Lily, congratulations on getting into grad school! I hope you’re able to get all the funding you need, and that your research projects are successful! You are extremely cool!

Ugh, I hate to say this, because I do love Hermione, but . . . I can understand Ron’s frustration with her a bit, too? She cares about her friends, but she expresses that care as a “mom friend,” enforcing rules and such. Hogwarts kids have enough adults in their lives; they don’t need more parenting from their own peer group! But . . . I’m also being a hypocrite, because that’s probably the type of friend I was as a child and teenager, too! We partly grow out of it???

Oh wow, the . . . Avalon cult is even more significantly worse than I realized! That hymn is dark beyond dark, like, the violence—the MURDER—is right there in the text! On the page! And they teach this stuff to children! (Yeah, I know the real Bible holds the record for “most characters murdered on page with an animal jawbone,” so real life isn’t really any better, but I’m still horrified.) Oh, and what a surprise, belief in Mother Magic comes with its own variation of rapture ideology. What’s the word for a religion that’s obsessed with the afterlife being more important than the living world, and looking forward to dying? Gosh, it rhymes with “breath tult,” what was it . . .

And speaking of things that were even more significantly worse than I realized, Cygnet Lodge needs to be, uh, razed to the ground and the earth beneath it salted? Because you are telling me, on top of all the troubled teens camp/gay conversion therapy coding, that the Carrows were also kidnapping Muggle children and telling the magic children to MURDER THE MUGGLE CHILDREN? And Draco refused, of course, but I’m betting some of the students actually do it? That is A LOT, wow. Now I’m scared to find out what happened between Draco and Lavender at Cygnet, because I’m scared it involved that Muggle boy somehow . . .

Little boy Gaunt isn’t quite as bad as his canon counterpart, in my eyes. Still malicious for sure, with his ire being focused on anyone “beneath” him, fitting with him growing up in privilege in a stratified society. But it’s also obvious that growing up with a parent has been good for him. He’s not a solitary figure lashing out with harm at anyone for any reason; he’s more calculating and indirect about what he does, with more concrete goals than “make others feel my misery.” It's also interesting that his name preference is chosen for a much more shallow reason: instead of Voldemort constructing a new name out of the old letters to forge himself a new future, Marvolo just wanted to “sound wizardy,” to fit in with (his perception of) his new culture. And of course, we know from Myrtle just how desperate he was to fit in . . . Oh, and Agatha cute, more Agatha please?

The ending scene was very lovely! After all the, uh, heavy? scenes between Harry and Draco this year, it was nice to see Harry just comforting Draco, and giving him somewhere safe to sleep. A nice cuddle for two tired kids!

—doctorlit is amused that if Harry had left Draco at the Slytherin common room, Harry would have been caught by Filch on the way back to Gryffindor’s

Amazing how Gaunt just contradicted his own logic, right there in the newspaper! “Hogwarts students have outsized influence on elections” and “there are only double digits worth of student voters in a given year” are a square peg and a gerrymander-shaped hole. But I’m sure his friends in the Circle of Avalon won’t notice, because they think they deserve to win all elections; he’s telling them exactly what they want to hear. Heck, Harry’s nightmare later in this very chapter confirms that following the heir of Slytherin is actually taught as part of the Avalonian “scripture.” Terrifying! It assumes that lineage will never produce an abusive monster! Thank goodness there aren’t any real life religions in the United States that would look to a particular politician as a figurehead, and vote him into a position of power on the assumption that he would destroy their perceived enemies and place their religion in ascension over the rest of U.S. culture! That would be destructive and harmful indeed! Anyway, I’m glad to see Marvolo Gaunt is finally making New Avalon great again.

Welp. I must be just as dense as Ron, because when Ginny said he had “three girls on the hook,” I had the exact same reaction. Who’s the third girl? Lavender, and Hermione . . . after three to five minutes of contemplation, I finally remembered Ron is interested in Cho in this timeline. I am not, uh . . . smart! (And yes, I know Hermione is the one Ron is failing to recognize, but obviously I wasn’t going to forget the local book nerd!) Also, speaking of Lavender, I know she isn’t “the one I’m supposed to be rooting for,” but I really do love that she got her hands on the commentator microphone and just immediately started talking up her man midgame. I like to think that even without Harry’s placebo ploy, Ron would have gotten a good enough confidence boost from Lavender’s words to get the job done satisfactorily. Lavender’s pretty okay, actually!

Oh ho ho, Brutus Malfoy played fast and loose with people’s safety, and paid a price! It seems that power and money can’t always save you after all! If Brutus hadn’t denied all those coverage claims, Luigi might not have—shoot, sorry, I moused over the wrong tab!

Ooooooooooooh, Rabastan is a bad dude. Like, I already knew that, for at least a couple reasons, but holy cow, that is a baaaaaad maaaaaan. He’s, um. That scene was kind of ill-making, you know what I mean? My stomach was upset with my eyes? Blegh. No wonder the Malfoy parents have ramped up their protagonist vibes this year; I’m impressed Narcissa had the pateience and strength of will to not murder Rabastan and join the Order of the Phoenix on the spot. Yeah, we need to, uh. We need to “finish the bonding” as soon as possible, so there’s no chance Draco can get forced into marrying Rabastan? And also, maybe, possibly, kill Rabaatan?! Because there might be more skinny teenage boys??!? And we need to??!?!?! Not let that!!?!?!?!?! Happen?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Boy, I did not catch the name during the Pensieve scene; that was Gregson? Man, she was on both ends of the Marvolo Gaunt situation, and didn’t even realize it . . . I love it as a writing detail, though, linking two separate years through a minor character. I’m also glad Draco was able to communicate the basilisk’s presence to someone close to the Order, too; They’re already lucky no one has run into the basilisk during the spying work! Progress! (My note-to-myself for this section reads, “basilisk at lastolisk.” Because I am a child.)

Some minor stuffs:
-Pansy immediately dropping Draco from the team is such a quintessentially Slytherin solution to a problem! “Teamwork not teamworking? Just cut off the weakest link and move on!”
-Pointless to keep ranting about it, but Nott is maneuvering in the background AGAIN. Although . . . interesting tidbit about one of his family’s elves getting MURDERED! Like, for what, the unionizing situation? But Nott’s father would seem like the logical suspect there, but he’s clearly concerned by it, AND seems to think it’s related to his own wife’s death, too? Extremely weird stuff going on there, and maybe Nott isn’t up to something dastardly after all . . . Oops. I ranted again.
-Noooo Hermione, calm down! You can’t go around attacking other students, you’ll get in trouble again!
-New word, sort of: “secateurs,” though I learned them as “garden shears.”

And a possible missing word, though I may have read the sentence wrong because it was very early this morning:
Harry dove into another fight with the Snargaluff, just Dean and Seamus’ whispered row . . .
I think you wanted “just as” after Snargaluff? Also, how dare you remind me Snargaluffs exist, I hate them so much.

—doctorlit makes his first post on the board since being declared cancer-free!

Heh, “Babbitea Rabbitea!” A pun worthy of the Potter section of that Universal Studios park, and it feels like it could exist in canon, as well. The animate rabbit cake also has the vibe of canon to it, alongside chocolate frogs and wizards’ chess. (Plus, yeah, I can easily picture kids having a little too much fun “hunting” after their cake . . .)

Go for it, Emily! I hope she finds a way through the wards, all the same, and finds her way back to her real family. If the situation with Gaunt and the Bonding weren’t so demanding of Our Heroes’ time, I feel like they would be looking for a way to help Emily. Hopefully you’re doing that Rowlingesque thing where a minor plot gets resolved as an accidental side consequence of the main conflict being addressed . . . We’ve got to get that girl home!

Boy, I wasn’t expecting this chapter to be such a huge deal when I started it, but it’s allowed me to finally and definitively shift the Lord and Lady Malfoy into the “protagonist column” in my mind. I just hope their willingness to prioritize Draco’s safety and Gaunt’s lack of access to more magic isn’t going to lead to their own deaths . . . Lucius transferring the family magic to Draco here and now is such a power play! Terrifying to see Draco visibly bending under it, though. This society is so used to accepting and using magic, that they’ve become desensitized to the side effects of its constant presence. (Although I suppose that’s common enough in any society. glances at alcohol, tobacco and cars) But I liked Harry’s little mini-speech about how Draco’s friendship has made him a better person, and the admission that he might have had a more black-and-white moral view of the Wizarding World if he hadn’t seen Draco learning to question things. I think it was good for Lucius to hear that, too!

I am in deep love with the fact that Ron is the only member of the quartet who has his eyes on a very serious plot point! Although I admit I’m second-guessing myself about my previous assumption: I don’t know if Nott is carrying out the Dumbledore assassination from canon, or if he really is just working to sabotage the Gryffindor Quidditch team! The vanishing cabinet feels like a major point there, because it was the main crux of Draco’s canon plan, but doesn’t seem like it would serve much point sabotaging the team, since dragging it to the pitch would be impossible to conceal without someone noticing . . . Unless he’s only using it as secret transport to Knockturn Alley to get other supplies, with no intention to move anything or anyone else through? Hm. I must read more chapters for data . . .

—doctorlit is vindicated to finally see some progress on the party drug potion plotline!

doctorlit, last chapter: Was that a Maiden’s Kiss?
narrator: It was, in fact, a Maiden’s Kiss.

I see the pre-Bond from the Maiden’s Kiss is connecting Harry with Draco’s dreams, just like what happens with Lily sometimes. I admit, though, that when that first nightmare started, I thought it was Harry dreaming about the abusive conditions Merope had grown up in after “meeting” her in the Pensieve . . . So it was a little horrifying to realize that it was actually Draco remembering Cygnet Lodge! That’s a real prisony, torturey vibe they have going on there, to say nothing of the conversion therapy/troubled teen industry metaphor! Then again, we saw what the Carrows were like while they were in control of Hogwarts in canon, so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that their alternate timeline selves are just as awful with authority over children. But man, making a ward that behaves like a boggart feels so far beyond the pale, even for this society! I guess they think a little PTSD is a reasonable price to pay for teaching the kids to “break down their resistance.” On a lighter note, I did enjoy the symbolism during the dream/memory of Pansy’s jump rope rhyme: Draco trips on the “H” for “Harry!”

I’m generally terrible at forming mental pictures of characters, but the second I read the green scarf in the Forbidden Forest, I immediately thought it belonged to Astoria. The end of the chapter seems to have proved me right, since it implies she saw Harry and Draco kissing that night! Astoria-stop-being-antagonistic-challenge, difficulty: impossible. And now Nott knows . . . And Nott was clearly heading for the Vanishing Cabinet, and is apparently in direct contact with Gaunt . . . He really is planning to sneak Knights of Camelot into Hogwarts to assassinate Dumbledore, isn’t he? There’s too much drama between Gaunt and the Malfoys in this timeline, so Gaunt selected a different Pureblood student for the task . . .

I know I’ve gone off on this before, but now that I’ve truly had a first-person account of how the Maiden’s Kiss affects people: this society all garbage! I hate that anyone goes through the Bonding process and thinks, “Yeah, I’m definitely going to apply that same potion to every one of my future infants so they can all experience the Objectively Worst Puberty, too! Glad I live in such an enlightened age.” Garbage. This practice should have died out after literally one generation. It’s mind control, and it’s nearly reducing Harry and Draco to animals. I hate it. Bless Lily and Jenni for their desperately necessary work!

Professor Liu: starts bringing up wife cauldrons
doctorlit: I don’t think this is some metaphor. It’s probably just telling the young men they need to help with house chores, and not leave all the domestic responsibilities to their future wives.
narrator: It was, in fact, some metaphor.

I’m glad to see Draco is being involved in the Pensieve lessons, and generally in the movement against Gaunt. He’s certainly had more time with the trio in this timeline, but he’s still felt distanced for a lot of the previous years; it’s high time the trio became a quartet for good, and Dumbledore recognizes it. For that matter, I like that Babbling’s research into Hogwarts’s history and the Tome’s archaeological veracity also seem to be leading her to a point of debunking some of Gaunt’s claims about the world. And perhaps the next session with Dumbledore will involve a first-hand account from Myrtle, rather than Pensieve memories? Dumbledore really seems to be weaving a lot of different threads together to deconstruct Gaunt’s fascism, and I love to see it!

Oh my, that Smart-Answer Quill is giving New Avalon an early taste of AI-generated essays! That’s very sad! I’m fond of the twins, but they need to let students learn how to construct sentences, dang . . .

Boy oh boy, this Pensieve memory is displaying a serious lack of reasoning skills, all around! First, Ogden and Radford listen to an account of what’s pretty clearly a dosing with love potion/Bond enhancer and they . . . just don’t notice? And then Cece and Dottie overhear two strangers in strange clothes talk about putting something in the lemonade, and then accept lemonade from those strangers like two minutes later? No wonder Merope got away with her plan, she was apparently the only intelligent person, wizard or Muggle, for miles and miles around!

New words you taught me:
Chivvy (I feel like this one has been in my vocabulary subconsciously, but I never really looked it up before now, and I don’t think I’ve ever used it myself!)
Craic

—doctorlit is impressed Dumbledore got the Acromantulas to sign anything at all, considering how spider feet are shaped . . .

Nothing good is going to come of Draco grabbing a sample of Draught of Living Death, especially since he hasn’t been tasked with assassinating Dumbledore in this timeline.
Oho.

I just hope the Sectumsempra spell isn’t there in this timeline, or that Harry doesn’t run into it, or never gets put in a position to try it.
Ohoho.

I guess someone’s trying to sabotage Gryffindor this year? Or maybe specifically the Gryffindor Quidditch team?
Ohohoho.

I'm glad you liked the house-elf shenanigans :D And yes, Astoria is such a wet cat right now. Poor pathetic little meow meow with her ill-advised crush... It is like a plot from a badfic, isn't it?

You make a good point about Gaunt Snr. being so obsessed with reclaiming the manor like Sauron reclaiming the Ring! I'd argue he's a bit more Gollumy, but y'know.

Read on to see more maidenly shenanigans ;) (I laughed so hard at that joke tbh)