… and now extremely multi-coloured, despite SeaTurtle’s best efforts at ‘helping’, the Irish Samurai launches one final balloon at some figures fleeing in the distance, although it seems some paint has got in the ballista’s mechanisms, and it goes wildly off target.

‘Nevermind, I’m sure it’ll hit something. Physics or the Narrative Laws should see to that.’

Having given up on the trusty siege weapon, the Irish Samurai pulls out one of those long, thin, balloons normally used for making balloon-animals, and fills it with water to use as a water-katana (real katanas apparently being on the banned list for water fights since the Fourth Geneva Convention).

Still slightly under the influence of High Pink, he then wanders through the sodden and painted battlefield, muttering to himself about tap-dancing spiders, and looking for someone to duel.

Donning her 2-D glasses, TheMadHatteress quickly spots ThatOne in the two dimensional tree. Seething with fury over her ruined hat, she quickly bombards ThatOne with water balloons. Vengeance never tasted so sweet.

And as ThatOne had already secured herself to the tree, she is not swept away by the incoming tsunami. However some of her balloons come loose and splatter on Jopalopa, who is being a spoilsport by involving super telepathy. He is now coated in a horrible mixture of bled and crimsun.

I already KNOW that I'm a jerk. Anybody care to get gnarly?