Subject: Re: Things I Am Not Allowed to Do at the PPC
Author:
Posted on: 2012-05-05 02:28:00 UTC
I will not break a Pinkie Pie Promise.
-I will also not make a Pinkie Pie Promise in the first place if I can't keep it.
I will not attempt to make an agent sick by booby trapping their food with one of Fred and George Weasley's trick sweets.
-In fact, I am not allowed to play any of the Weasley Twins' pranks on anybody at all.
-Unless the target is a Sue.
I will not lock Pinkie Pie and Eeyore in the same room, just to see whose personality influences the other
-Ditto Kenpachi Zaraki and Shinji Ikari.
Duct-taping MREs to yourself and bluffing a suicide bombing is not an appropriate way to get a raise from the flowers. It won't work.
- Nor is it appropriate to use against a Sue.
- Or an Agent.
- Or a canon character.
-I will not market regular sunflower seeds as "Grow your own leader."
-I will not use Luxury as an excuse for why I was late for something if it isn't true. It only invites the possibility for it to happen.
-The SO's fronds and roots are not 'Combat Tentacles' and I will not try to prove this poor theory to my partner by portalling an angry Klingon into his office.
...I burst out laughing at that top one~ XD
I will not introduce Agent Lux to Don Juan.
They are also not allowed to get into any situation where they could reproduce. *shudder* No one needs frightening, blonde, over-libidio'ed children running around.
I've lost track of what numbers we should be on now, but I've got a couple to submit;
- I will treat this list as the warning it was intended as, not as a series of challenges.
Related to the above; I will not take carefully edited exerts from this list, and swap them with anyone else's Personal Challenge lists, or steps of any recovery program they may be on.
- may not use canon characters to transport loot back to your RC; you can only take what you can carry (this applies even if the characters are canonical slaves/servants and you neuralyze them afterwards).
-As far as we can tell, Princess Cadence is not a Sue...
...and you're not allowed to kill Canon characters anyway.
-I will not set up fights between Team Edward fans and Team Jacob fans, no matter how fun it might be.
...Nor fights between Twilight fans and Anti-Twilighters.
...Or, for that matter, obsessive Bronies and Anti-Bronies.
-I will not bring up "Cupcakes" around Pinkie Pie. If I do, I am to be held responsible for the consequences.
-Just because Kyuubey can come back from the dead doesn't give me the right to kill him repeatedly, no matter how much I hate the little bastard.
-I must remember that WWII is not as fun as Hetalia protrays it.
-I will stop griping about the end of Mass Effect 3, it's been run into the ground since then.
(Yeah, sorry if some of these are repeats, I've been trying to come up with these off the top of me head)
Although it was worded differently.
Yeah, the little cat-rabbit bastard isn't well liked among the PPC. I'd like to put a couple bullets through him myself.
No points for guessing on what I'm going to try out that air-soft AK-74 i'm thinking of buying.
(Yeah, I'm going to swiss-cheese a cutout of Kyubey. Yeah, plastic pellets against paper cutout ism't the same thing as real thing against real thing, but it's porbably better this way.)
The '74 like you can buy at Dick's? If so; don't bother - buy an M4. I had the '74 for a while, and it wasn't that great.
While I'd like to do it, my time is swallowed by other stuff and I'm not very physically fit either.
I do like to do things like building targets and exercise my aiming skills, though. Until now, I used a cheap spring-loaded Beretta 92.
A classmate of mine stopped doing it and is selling his stuff for dirt cheap, so I'm probably going to buy his AK-74.
1460:
-Or Tzeench. Although he probably knows how already.
I am not allowed to take an Ipod and speakers into fantasy canons and pretend to be a wizard.
~I will not draw England's eyebrows on people as they sleep.Especially not if the person happens to be America.Or anyone from the Hetalia fandom, for that matter.
~~I will not draw England's eyebrows on people if they are awake, either.
"Yolo" is never an acceptable excuse for anything. Ever.
This especially apples if you are a Time Lord.
14...74?. I am not allowed to introduce Agent Luxury to a White Court vampire "to see what would happen."
1475. I am not the Dragonborn. Consequently, shouting "Fus Ro Dah!" at a crowd in the cafeteria will just get me strange looks.
1476. "Kamina would have done it" is rarely a valid excuse.
- Ditto "Harry Dresden would have done it;" it makes the flowers uncomfortable.
1477. I am not to use a portal generator to put a window onto the Lesser Sea of Amorphia in my RC. No matter how pretty I think it is.
-Luxury is not to be allowed anywhere near Thomas Raith, especially during the last scene involving him in Ghost Story.
-No matter how much bad stuff she goes through, I am not allowed to print out goodfic and give it to Ivy.
-I will not write anything down that has to do with the PPC while in the Dresden Files.
-Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie are not allowed to meet Sherlock Holmes and/or Watson.
-No, Pinkie Pie will not be summoned if I say the phrase, 'Losing a friend's trust is the fastest way to lose a friend-'
--FOREVER! Oh, hey, am I on the internet?
1449 Addendum: The last time someone did that, the fans went rabid
1457 Addendum: I am not allowed to have a flamethrower built into my body. If my body wasn't like that at recruitment, I don't get to make it that way later.
Addendum 2: No, I am not allowed to use time-travel to put a flamethrower in my body before I get recruited.
-Akemi Homura and the Doctor are not allowed to meet
-I am not allowed to call Kyubey out on his not-knowledge of entropy
-Throwing a Magi!Sue's Soul Gem down a pit, while satisfying, still does not kill her (unless it breaks.) Destroy it properly.
-In the event a Puella Magi Suefic involves a timeskip or coma scene, I am not allowed to steal the Sue's soul gem for a few days, let her body rot, and then watch as everyone fawns over a girl with half her face gone.
-Dumping a body in a Witch's barrier to dispose of it is fine. Dumping a body on top of Kyubey while he's in a barrier is not.
--Yes, he deserves it, but he's never in a barrier and not with the main cast.
-Introducing Sakura Kinomoto or Usagi Tsukino to any cast member of Madoka is Right Out.
-Queen Chrysalis is not swiss cheese and I should stop treating her as such.
-Telling Charlotte that Queen Chrysalis is in fact a rare black cheese is cruel... to Charlotte.
-I will not spam Mami with the message 'Mami Mogu Mogu'
--Or with the wide, wide variety of CharlotteXMami fanart.
-I will not feed Kyubey a bomb cleverly disguised as a Grief Seed.
-- In fact, I will not try to kill Kyubey in any way. While he deserves it, killing canons is forbidden.
--- Besides, he would just reincarnate again.
-I will always make sure that Kyubey is properly neuralized before leaving a Madoka badfic. I will be considered responsible for every PPC Agent becoming a Puella Magi otherwise.
-I will not try to kill Walpurgisnacht to make Homura and Madoka to stay together. I don't have that kind of firepower, and I would be a Sue if I did.
-- Portaling Nanoha in to blast Walpurgisnacht with a Starlight Breaker is right out.
--- No, both anime being directed by Akiyuki Shinbo is not a valid justification.
-Homura does not want Madoka's panties. She will probably fill you with bullets for suggesting it.
-I will not explain to Kyoko the 'value of used panties'
--As soon as she reads this, Luxury will not be allowed into Madoka.
-Charlotte and Elly are dangerous creatures that feed on despair. They are not for hugging.
-Addendum to the second-to last one: Neither will I spam Sayaka with EllyXSayaka fanart
-Hitomi punched Madoka in the stomach once, while being controlled by a Witch, so I should stop referencing it.
Speaking of Kyubey...
-I am not allowed to make a contract with Kyubey.
--This counts double if I am male.
-I cannot force canon or OC characters to contract either.
Addendum to the second:
-That would be cruel, and attempting to do it will probably result in the characters wishing for me to be destroyed.
-I will not make logic-bomb wishes (I wish that I was not a magical girl, etc.)
I am not a consulting detective.
-People find it rude when I try to deduce their life stories with a single glance.
I will not bring up jam around Agents who work in the Sherlock fandom.
-Same goes for hedgehogs and otters.
John Watson is not a hedgehog.
-Sherlock Holmes is not an otter.
-Holmesian Agents really don't like it when I insist they are.
I will not run around trying to taste everyone's blood, insisting that I am a "rainbow drinker".
I will not install sBurb onto my console.
I will not bring Gamzee Makara into HQ.
I will not "do the windy thing".
-Nor will I do the Spacey Thing, Lifey Thing, Voidy Thing, Ragey Thing, Hopey Thing, Hearty Thing, or any of the many other variations thereon.
I will not break a Pinkie Pie Promise.
-I will also not make a Pinkie Pie Promise in the first place if I can't keep it.
I will not attempt to make an agent sick by booby trapping their food with one of Fred and George Weasley's trick sweets.
-In fact, I am not allowed to play any of the Weasley Twins' pranks on anybody at all.
-Unless the target is a Sue.