Okay, to begin with the agents themselves: You have an agent from a terrifyingly overpowered race, which Wikipedia tells me are super intelligent and are learn-all to know-all types. This does not give me great confidence, and goes somewhat crosswise to the general idea of ordinary- or at least not super special- agents. Especially given Lovecraft. If anyone else reads this who is more familiar with Lovecraft's mythos and this particular species, I'd like you to chime in here as to this agent and their viability because I, personally, am not sure of this one working well at all.
Your second agent appears to be all of six years old, sets all the things on fire, and given your character description, does not seem to be controllable in the least.
The age factor makes me- and probably most others- uneasy. The lowest age I've seen for a field agent is twelve or thirteen. Youngest agent I've seen at all was eleven or so, and she was not a field agent at all. This is, of course, going with apparent age/acted age. (Ilraen, for example, doesn't count.) Your badfic linked has sex in it. You're pairing that with the intent of having an apparent six year old as an agent to take part in killing it. The reasons why this is a bad idea and will make many, if not all people here uncomfortable should be clear.
Second point: Setting all the things on fire is her thing? Okay. Is there anything else? Apparently not. 'Sets everything on fire' is not a character trait. Well, pyromania is a character trait, but it doesn't make for a character.
Third point, and possibly the one that needs to be elaborated on the most: She cannot be controlled. This is not a good thing. This is not a 'oh, this is so funny!'. This is the point where one wonders why she is still around. PPC agents might rail against the establishment, or they might dislike the Flowers, or they might hate their partner, but they are able to be check in check under normal situations.
I was reading the Christmas party RP, and I noticed your posts. Kasaiko, you made evident, has no sense of self control and cannot be controlled even under normal circumstances. (You also godmoded to ensure that, and make it clear.)
This character would make a terrible agent because she has no personality traits whatsoever, does not work with the PPC because of the issue with control, and would make people feel distinctly uncomfortable at best, and like utter scummy creeps at worst, and also have the potential for getting people in severe trouble due to the combination of what is in fics and her apparent age.
Now, to move on to the writing sample.
This is bad writing.
Your sentences have no structure at all; let's take this first paragraph you gave us.
Ekaes, a lady of the wind, and small so, again flew from her home in the high peaks of Celara, because the earth rumbled about her, and so she thought that a fourth war had come. She possessed little, so she flew away unencumbered. Ekaes was always flying somewhere, moving as often as someone of the flame, though she had not fire’s courage. Indeed, moving without purpose was common for the people of the wind, but when the third war was beginning, she fled from the old world, and so she survived.
This is purple prose. These sentences have little, if any, grammatical structure behind them. This whole paragraph has me utterly baffled as to how you are trying to say this that I'm not even sure how to say it's wrong besides that it is wrong.
The rest of the sample fares even worse- there are outright contradictions and things that make no sense. "Even though the people of the wind wore light clothing, because thicker clothes would merely weigh these small people down, Ekaes felt the heat." Thin clothing does not stop heat from reaching you.
I could- and probably should- continue, but it is past two AM and I have work.
Also, fire does not need to be in all capitals.
Permission not granted.