Subject: Matthew 6:5 ...
Author:
Posted on: 2011-10-24 00:16:00 UTC
"And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward."
blasphemers and apostates of AMERICA heed the word of the LORD and repent
murderers
gays
rapists
idol worshippers
child molesters
atheists
deniers of the LORD's glory
shall burn in the pit of HELL unless they admit their SINS and repent and give themselves over to the LORD's grace and mercy
Hey fella I don't think that's gonna convert anyone, trust me a youth club works much better.
Who's up for some scrambled troll?
*sends Frenchmen after the spammer*
I am not christian! I have respect for most Christians, who are just normal people. Anyways, what is that? Two trolls in a short period? (Remember Mr. Anonymous?)
Use the shift key more.
Please, annoy people somewhere else.
You aten't going to convert anybody, you know.
I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the flame of Anor! The dark and fire will not avail you, flame of Udun. Go back to the shadow! YOU! SHALL NOT! PASS!
I know I shouldn't feed the troll, but here goes anyway:
"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."
Look, mac, I don't know whether you are a person behind a computer or some automated bot. I'll assume, for now, that you are the former.
First off, you're singling out a single nation in your message. Isn't the "word of the LORD", as you put it, meant to be a global message?
Second, all I'm hearing here is "fire and brimstone" "preaching" (if such could be called). You do know we Christians generally fell out of that quite some time ago?
Third and finally, why specify specific sins in that little rant? I mean, aren't ALL sins a sin in the sight of the Lord?
If this is a bot, I laugh. If this is a troll, check your Bible once again and leave the Board out of this.
It's people like you that give Christianity a bad name.
Also, a point of advice: Threatening people with something they don't believe in, and you can't prove, isn't going to do anything more than make you look like an idiot and an asshole. (Or maybe a troll, either way it's not going to convert anyone.)
Well, that and maybe garner some entertaining responses from the local smart asses.
The corrupt and the wicked and do not falter.
Blessed are the peacekeepers, the champions of the just.
-Benedictions 4:10
... Oh, I'm sorry, I thought this had turned into a chanter's board. :S
When everyone's heart is filled with light, the inhabitants of all words will be reunited under the light of Kingdom Hearts! Have you defeated any Heartless lately? What are you doing to bring us all closer to once again living in the single World?
I can be reached at Techno.Dann@gmail.com , if you don't feel like posting it here. (I get a ton of spam already, so do your worst, spammers.)
Have I done something wrong? If so, I'm sorry.
I'm just trying to get all the PGs' E-mail addresses, in case something comes up. :D
Well, that was certainly refreshing.
Anybody else up for some deep-fried troll tonight? I brought the vat of oil!
"Asteroid strike?" said Aziraphale. "Quite the fashion these days, I understand. Strike into the Indian Ocean, great big cloud of dust and vapor, goodbye all higher life forms."
"Wow," said Crowley, taking care to exceed the speed limit. Every little bit helped.
"Doesn't bear thinking about. does it," said Aziraphale gloomily.
"All the higher life forms scythed away, just like that."
"Terrible."
"Nothing but dust and fundamentalists."
- Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, Good Omens
"Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."
- Matthew 22:37-40
"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God."
- Matthew 5:9
"And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward."
Hey, random capitalisation is fun!
*finds gigantic flyswatter and beats troll about the head*
Seen it all before. Besides, given that like Laburnum and Eileen, I'm not in America, your rant doesn't apply to me. Go back to your bridge and keep screaming your incoherent ridiculousness, nobody here's listening.
Nice try but no cigar. You're far too obvious to be a sincere poster.
(Trolls will be laughed at)
What'you bother me for?!
Yay, I'm English so I can murder people all I like!
While it is absolutely right to mock the troll, be careful that you are not mocking the people that the troll is pretending to represent.
We do not mock religions or the people who truly believe in them, though we may disagree with what they have to say.
Now go about your troll hunt. (Pro-tip: Why do they care about people who blaspheme or defect from America? Discuss.)
-Phobos
Though I would note that, if memory serves true, at least half the people currently mocking the troll are indeed Christians of some bent or other.
Though I would note that all sects of Christianity don't always get along. I have heard Christians say offensive things about what Christians, of other denominations, believe.
How can such a thing even be possible? You speak madness, sirrah, sheer folly and madness.
:P
hS, firm believer that left-handed Christians actually worship pineapples
[Insert Baptist comment on Catholics and alcohol here]
I very nearly added to the above, "And I really don't think any sect of Christianity is quite as crazy as our trollish friend up there." But didn't.
Also, relatedly: a plug! Slacktivist: You Might be an Evangelical if... The comments are, as is so often the case, at least as good-- everyone, including the atheists, jumped in with their own jokes. 'Twas a fun thread.
Hey there, troll.
I thought you lot were all supposed to vanish two days ago...
Lookie, spare parts!
Since I'm not in America, I'll just ignore your advice, then. Probably would have done so, even if I were in America.
The Lord's grace and mercy, which includes burning everyone you don't like forever in the pit of HELL.
Or, as I put it to a new-met friend last night, "We're here to tell you the Good News! ...You're going to Hell."
You're a troll, so I won't bother picking your theological ideas trollishness apart. Go back to your bridge.
Do I see things, or this sounds like a very intolerant/fanatic Catholic Christian?
Don't get me wrong here, I'm catholic myself (Mostly. I don't quite approve that the Church thinks that homosexuality is a sin, even if I am straight myself), the thing that sounds bad is the fact that this bot, troll or whatever is using religion to annoy people.
I find myself to be amused, not annoyed.
If they think they can get the Christians and non-Christians arguing about this, they need to go to Wal-Mart and buy themselves a brain. This is so extremist it's ludicrous. Hardly anybody still thinks Christians really act like that. (Well, unless they're one of the seventy-some Westboro Baptist people, but they're such a joke that nobody listens to them.)
Glad to see we have some--
Oh, wait, I would reserve that line for an actual newbie. You're not one of them, so yeah.
Also, if you're serious, I can tell you without a single shadow of a doubt that you're going to hell for being so shamelessly hateful.
Also, to your comment referring to "gays" going to hell, I present this: http://humon.deviantart.com/art/Sheep-262786780
And if you're trolling, well... Whatever.
I think that link is going to be my new favorite picture.
...during the most recent torrent of bot-spam. Probably some kind of open proxy, which leads me to believe that this is nothing more than (a poor attempt at) trolling.
If the former, look up the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector. If the latter, it's an low-down trick.