Re: There's a small issue with it...

Really Bad Fanfic by Flyndragon on 2011-08-14 06:49:00 UTC Reply

Alright, so there is this fic called Family Matters . It. . .
Well, it may not be the worst fic evar, but it certainly makes me wish for bleeprin. It starts off sane and then only gets more and more ridiculous.

The Dursleys are horrible and abusive as they always are in bad fanfic, so Harry runs away to go live with the Grangers, who practice nudism and have no problem with Harry having sex with their teenage daughter under their own roof. Hermione's mom is constantly stated to look like she could be her daughter's older sister and we're told that the Granger's nudism is not about sex. . . and then Harry has sex with Mrs. Granger. But it's alright and Mr. Granger forgives him because it too dark for Harry to see WHO HE WAS HAVING SEX WITH!!!

Sorry, descended into capslock of rage there for a minute. I'm back now. To continue. . .

Then she gets pregnant, but Mr. Granger's okay with it — "it was an honest mistake", and they've always wanted another child. Oh, and it's twins. Hermione gets pregnant thanks to magical coma sex. Both female Grangers give birth on the same day and oh god make it stop!

Deep breaths, deep breaths. . .

So in the end everyone who's good gets a happy ending with lots of orgies and babies and everyone who's bad gets what's coming to them.

Also Harry becomes Minister of Magic at 16.

Now I think I'm going to go whimper in a corner for a bit.

What The Hey!? by dramaticsoprano on 2011-08-16 22:24:00 UTC Reply

Merely reading the summary makes me want to throw up. That kind of story is just disgusting.
Whaaaaaa....? by Myrtle Tamlane on 2011-08-16 07:00:00 UTC Reply

This reminds me of the Faramir/Shagrat love story that's sitting in Unclaimed Badfic right now, just because of the degree to which it makes me want to simultaneously laugh, vomit, and sob hysterically.
No. Just... No. by Luigifan on 2011-08-16 06:40:00 UTC Reply

.........I... what... gurk... That's it. Who wrote that drivel? I wanna blow their computer up.
Wait...WHAT?!?! by ShatteredSanity on 2011-08-15 01:41:00 UTC Reply

Okay, first thought: Wait, we're alowed to post links to bad fic?
Second thought:ummmmm okay...
Third thought:O.O
Fourth thought:WHAT THE F---!!!
Fifth thought: If Harry is 16 doesn't that mean he's out of age?

Yes. by Aeidhryn on 2011-08-15 14:15:00 UTC Reply

We're allowed to plug badfic. It gives us a place to vent about horribleness and yell WHY GOD WHY all together.

And never try to apply logic to badfic. Your head will explode.

There's a small issue with it... by HerrWozzeck on 2011-08-14 10:40:00 UTC Reply

...if anyone wants to spork it, we have to register with this site so we can see the fic. So unfortunately, yeah.

But what you just described I think gives us MORE than a good idea of what we need to expect. I mean, Jesus Christ on a pikestaff, what in the world is all that? That's just...

Excuse me while I go hunt down some Bleeprin...

That's just wrong. by theEmily on 2011-08-18 05:45:00 UTC Reply

I would totally register just to spork that kind of WTFery. It's just... WHUT. And just... BAD. But in an entertaining way.

At least it's not noncon?

Oh, never mind. I re-read the OP... by theEmily on 2011-08-18 05:50:00 UTC Reply

... and it is noncon after all. I think my brain just kind of blocked it out the first time. Couldn't handle both it and the incest and the multiple pregnancies and the tangled family tree and the nudism and...

Yeah, this is just WHUT.

Re: There's a small issue with it... by Flyndragon on 2011-08-14 23:39:00 UTC Reply

Sorry, I've been a part of the site for a long time so it didn't occur to me that others would need to create an account.
My bad.