Digimon, eh? Nifty. Here's a heavily-annotated copy of V. Propp's "Morphology of the Folktale" and a small stuffed moose.

Have some food!

Have some colored pencils and two generic keys.

'Ere, 'ave a conical hat and a pie.

The conical hat is made from tin foil and duct tape, so it keeps the conspiracy theorists out.

The pie is just this pie, y'know?

Here you have a really small gomamon. Watch out, he bites.

Have some Mary Sue candy!

Thanks for the virtual stuff. I'm hoping you'll see it again soon.
I have a couple of questions. First of all, do both of your agents have to be human (I saw one that was a small lizard man)? Also, where can I post completed missions? I'm pretty sure the Pit of Voles wouldn't like me running around on their site going "Die, Sue, die- oh, shiny!". Are any of these places free, like the Pit? Lastly, if I target a fic, can I tell the charges to the author of the fic to help them fix the fic or write better in the future (except, obviously, annoying the agents)?

Have a thought balloon and some astronaut ice-cream!

It's always nice to see new people here.

Here, have some Debussy for the road:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LviYYTK6Apw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmD6jYW1_pc&feature=related

Well met, rookie! Enjoy this Big Shiny Distracting Thing as a welcoming gift.

Hi! Have some fudge!

Have a Dramatic Longcoat. Great for posing, as they'll flutter dramatically regardless of if there's wind or not.

Welcome to the board. Have a leather bound copy of the missions of Jay and Acacia.

Don't feed it Sue meat.

Have a pair of socks, useful for when you need another pair to wear or as an improvised weapon!

Fair winds!

Now you can throw BBQ parties!

Welcome, new friend! Help yourself to the sack of venomous arthropods. Don't worry, they don't bite!