Have a large red flower that lets you throw fireballs, a shining star for steering tall ships by, a dented full helm, and a handful of pocket lint.

Welcome to the Board! Here, have some chocolate, end enjoy your stay!

Here, have a conical hat and a tea biscuit!

The conical hat is made from duct tape and tinfoil, so it's conspiracy-theoristproof. The tea biscuit is just this tea biscuit, y'know?

Hi, have some fudge!

Actually, for being dragged into that self-insert Suefic, have a second plate :) .

Fair winds!

Now you can throw BBQ parties!

Have this watering can and this sheet of A3 paper!

Don't feed her Sues or Stus.

Welcome to the Board, delicious friend! Have a pet cat, a tinfoil hat and a purple bat.

I've just been welcomed myself. Please, take this hat. It's just your style.

Here, have some snacks and water!

Welcome, new friend! Have a poisoned shuriken! Just don't touch this edge here, where--Ah! Ouch!...Oh dear...
*sound of body hitting floor*