...Ah, that's the other reason your name is ringing little gongs in my head. Jacer goes to both Jace, a Stu in my sister's guilty pleasure novels, City of Ash and their ilk, and Jacer + Narnia + Christianity rings bells of Agent Jaster, who used to hang around here, and whose C. S. Lewis icon reminds me a great deal of 6). I'll have to look it up at some point.

You seem nice, and I look forward to seeing you around here, and hopefully the IRC as well!

A few things, though:
We don't do Bible fic here-- when it was discovered, there was something of a shockwave, and the general decision was No, we don't even want to Go There. I dunno if opinion has changed since then, but... I'm still in the place where Bible fic is just so much Do Not Want.
Secondly, um. On the slash thing. I would love to discuss this with you, but here does not seem like a good place. There are links and things that kind of explain my position on slash, and... well, non-heterosexuality in general, as a bisexual Christian.
Thirdly: Coraline! You're a Neil Gaiman fan? Have you read his other stuff-- or his blog? Are you in any other of his fandoms?

At any rate! Have a spork and a towel, two things a PPCer should never be without! See you around!

Hey there! I still think of myself as a newbie too, considering I almost never post, but...*waves*
Here, have a lemon square and a funny-looking train ticket! If you can guess where I stole the train ticket from, you can have a pony! (Hint: It wasn't San Francisco :D )

Hello and welcome to the PPC Posting Board! Here, have some chocolate, and please enjoy your stay!

and may force be with you... always

Have some robes!

Besides, if you are really thinking about writing ppc missions, then just be careful out there- you might never know what you'll encounter out there in this verse.

...new fellow with a really long introduction!

I don't think anyone will kill you unless you speak your mind in a harshly way; after all we're a group of people (people tend to never think exactly the same about a same topic)from different parts of the world, but anyway we can share opinions without killing each other.
So, ok of moral speech. Here you have a bobble head Lewis which works better if you put it in front of a window.

Hi Jacer! Have some fudge!

Don't feed it Sues or Stus.

Fair winds!

Now you can throw BBQ parties!

Yay, you referenced AVPM! And, out if curiosity, what is Bible fanfiction like? I've often wondered, but been too afraid to look.
Anyway, have a funny hat, a pet cat and a squeaky rubber rat.

Welcome, new friend! Have a stodgy old narrator with a British accent. He's a joy to listen to, even when he's just describing the things around him. Enjoy!

Morbid curiosity forces me to ask what your problem is with slash. I can understand thinking badslash is wrong, because it is, but all slash? Even if it's not canon, there are some surprisingly good slash stories out there that stay within the realm of both possibility and plausibility.

Hello! Have a seventeen foot long, multicolored, wool, knit scarf (curly wig not included), and a bag of jelly babies.

Please use them IRresponsibly!

Now a Disclaimer: You do not have to read these things (except the Board Constitution--which you already read). You do not have to write to be a part of the PPC. Some active and respected PPCer's have never been to the wiki, and quite a few very active and respected PPCer's have not and never plan to write missions. That said, many people have found these things to be useful and/or to answer a lot of the questions that often come up.

* The Original PPC Series, which we assume you've already read.
* The List of Killed Badfic, which will direct you to a large number of non-Original Series PPC Missions.

The Board:
* The Board Constitution
* The FAQ: For the Board

The Wiki:
* We have our very own PPC Wiki
* The very-important-to-read-before-requesting-Permission Permission article
* Our Guide To The PPC
* The Mission Writing Guide
* The Slash-Sporking Guide
* The FAQ: For Newbies
When you are ready to edit the wiki, make sure to read Neshomeh's excellent editing tutorial

And finally, but very usefully,
* The List of Everything PPC

Greetings, newbie! Have some Red Vines!

Nice to meet you. Have a cheese cracker.

It's been too long since I greeted a newbie, Welcome, Jacer!

Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object of much shininess. It's nice to meet you.

...Also, you like AVPM? Totally awesome! :D Hardly anyone I know likes it much.

It is being hand-knitted with zig-zag stripes of alternating colors, none of which have absolutely any bearing on eachother whatsoever. The colors are all neon, and predominantly blue. It is roughly three feet too long for you. No matter how tall you are or will grow, it is and will still be three feet to long for you.

If you are refusing this gift, I am paying as many people as I can afford to be hunting you down and doing horrible things to your pets. If you do not have pets, I will buy and send you pets and pay people to do horrible things to them. THIS IS HOW WE ARE DOING THINGS IN PPC. IN SOVIET INTERNETS, LOLCAT STICK CAPTION UP YOU...

Wait, what? Oh, I'm sorry, I think I may have just had an episode. That...happens here. So yeah...

Welcome to the PPC, a totally chill group of totally non-tyrannical non-communist dudes and lady-dudes. In fact, apart from previously afformentioned gift-giving, I'm fairly sure we don't have any economy whatsoever. Or any government, for that matter, unless you count the Oldbies, and they're not really much for tyranny so far as I've seen. I mean, honestly, Russians? What Russians? Ain't nobody here but us French-Americans. Weeell, I'm French-American, anyway. I really have to also say 'and us other Americans', too. And us Brits and Aussies. And, all us other Europeans, Asians, Africans, South Americans, and Mexicans. and every other group I forgot to mention because I'm really lazy. Oh, yeah, and all those 'Canadians', too.

(NOTE: I don't believe in Canada, for reasons to be explained at a later, entirely hypothetical date. Hopefully, said hypothetical date is none too soon.)

The point being. The point being what? Oh, I remember. The point being, no Russians. To my knowledge. Unless, of course, Sergio Turbo...Well, it sounds a bit Russian, sort of, a little...Umm...

(NOTE X2: To Sergio Turbo and all other hypothetical, plausible Russians - If you are reading any of this, PLEASE DISREGARD ANYTHING I HAVE EVER SAID, EVER. Thank you.)

The point being...The point being...Oh, yes. The point being, don't even bother cutting down your posts. Don't even bother. Because here at the PPC, we will outramble, outrant, and outruminate you into the ground. You cannot outlast us, and WE WILL DEFEAT YOU. Bon nuit, et viva le Francais!

PS. You might want to look up the definiton of slash. Just sayin', you just really should know what you're arguing for or against. Most of the other stuff we all agree with far as I know, but yah might recieve some hatin' over that lil' tidbit of news. Just saying. Peace, yo.

Also, since you've had the misfortune to remind me that we used to give out bumper stickers around here, here you go! *sticks you with a sticker that says "Love me, love my beta."*

I'm not the Official Bumper Sticker Giver or the Deputy Bumper Sticker Giver, by the way. Those people faded away ages ago. I'm just slightly less ancient than they are, and too stubborn to leave, that's all. ^^;

I'd like to take a moment and be happy that there's someone else in the world who's heard of the BBC (Wonderworks, wasn't it?) Narnia movies. Sometimes I think my brother and I are the only ones. ^^

Enjoy the deluge of presents you shall shortly receive!

~Neshomeh

Have a hat knit from only the softest pelts of Cute Animal Friends! Sure to keep you warm in the coldest, darkest, soul-crunchingest badness of badfic!

Don't worry. We don't turn people away because they're twihards... but she may understand when she gets here and sees the wiki. >_>

Here, have an Adamantium combat knife, guaranteed to gut most sues and cut almost all types of cake!

Now, onto your questions.

Well, all the gifts you receive, you can assume they are given to your agents should you get permission and use them however you will.

2). It is good you are a SPaG (SPelling and Grammar) nut, those are welcomed here.

10) Absolutely no problem with having a Twihard among us, I myself am a recovering Twilight add- I mean fan. We don't have many agents who will do Twilight, so it would be helpful.

As for the number of agents, you can have as many as you want (within reason), though only having two or three to a team. you can have other teams if you wish, though too many can be too cumbersome.

As for them being sues, have you put them through one of the litmus tests? those can help you fix many characters, it did for mine.

And don't feel afraid to make long posts, especially if it is introducing yourself.