Subject: Don't worry.
Author:
Posted on: 2010-10-28 16:14:00 UTC
As a rule of thumb, is better gift somebody with either real things or already existing PPC-related ones.
However, relax. Nothing bad happened. Here, take this Random Sue Execution Gun and try it. If you want, we can break into DoSAT and steal the plans. And then build enough to give them to all newbies.
Hi, newer than me newbie
Here's a machete. Good for hacking up tree branches and dumb campers. :P
From a fellow newbie! I don't have much to give, as of yet, but I hope this Miniature Rabid Landshark will serve you well.
Have a cake, complete with a entry titled "How to Kill Someone With Your Bare Hands" and one cross bore hole electromagnetic imaging rhubarb.
Unbelievable. You, [SubjectNameHere], must be the pride of [SubjectHometownHere].
Ahem. Have one of GLaDOS' computer spheres. Don't even ask me how I got my hands on one of those. Unlike the weighted companion cube (Remember? Your bestest friend? The one you killed, you psycho?), the computer sphere will threaten to stab you, and in fact, can speak.
Fair winds!
Now you can throw your BBQ parties!
Hello and welcometo the Board! Here, have some chocolate, and enjoy your stay!
Glad to have you here. Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object.
Hello [SUBJECT NAME HERE]. Would you be from [SUBJECT HOMETOWN HERE], perchance?
Have a pet cat and a Pie of Rassilon.You may name the pet cat whatever you wish, so long as you do not euthanise* it. As for the pie...let's just say I'm a humanutarian, and leave it at that.
*However, if you do choose to euthanise it, you will have done faster than any test subject on record. You monster.
Thanks for the warm welcome and the large collection of wonderfully random objects!
Now I just need to find somewhere to put them...
YAY for Portal. ^_^ (my boyfriend loves the game, and he literally sang "Still Alive" to me over the phone when I was having a bad day, which made me laugh).
Here, have some Corellian firewhiskey, a lightsaber of your color choice (not to be used inside HQ) and a vornskr pup. Name it as you please.
Have a gun... no, wait, you already got one. Er, have a folding car. It becomes a (heavy) case when not in use. Do not keep it in small places, if the folding mechanism malfunctions there would be troubles!
Do not feed it Sues or Stus.
Welcome, *subject name here*!
Have a genuine Aperture Science coffee mug, an Aperture Science radio (na na na naa na...) and an Aperture Science swivelling chair. We hope you enjoy these tokens and bribes of our appreciation.
Did you know that this chat-room is now more valuable than all the blood and organs of the population of *subject hometown here*?
Have a Paranoiac's Friend (tm) Mark VII camera! It runs for over three weeks without recharging and has a complicated turn-off sequence so people can't turn it off*! Now with thumbtack attachment for bugging places, people, and other nouns! Paranoiac's Friend: for the paranoiac in all of us!
(*Including, probably, you. Good luck with that.)
Have some chocolate.
Welcome to the Board!
Here's a Randomly Generated Sue Execution Device. keep it handy on your first Mission, and let it be whatever grisly tool the plot needs it to be.
If you just wanted to give a weapon letting him choose what it is, I'm sorry for misundrstanding, but if the RGSED is actually a weapon that changes itself at each different use, there is already the Random Sue Execution Gun, briefly glimpsed (it didn't work) in my first mission.
Don't worry, I do not want to be mean and I am not angry, but two almost identical things, with the same use and similar name, can be confusing.
I hadn't thought to check. Then again, with so many Boarders with their own newbie gifts, it's difficult to come up with something original.
Gah. This is embarrassing.
As a rule of thumb, is better gift somebody with either real things or already existing PPC-related ones.
However, relax. Nothing bad happened. Here, take this Random Sue Execution Gun and try it. If you want, we can break into DoSAT and steal the plans. And then build enough to give them to all newbies.
Have some cookies. They're made of awesome.
Hi, and welcome to the board! I'm TheLowtide, a fellow newbie here. Uh, I don't have anything to give you outside of what I got, but heck, I can get another. Have a Sawed-off Shotgun, but remember to make sure you've got your permits. See you on the board!