Subject: I didn't add them mostly to avoid an even longer post.
Author:
Posted on: 2010-07-02 02:37:00 UTC

I guess I was more nitpicky than I thought, but I now count one more as positive rather than mixed.

chapter 1
Nice! Poor guy, but great writing.
(Positive)

chapter 2
Oh, no, not an amnesiac. *headdesk* Ughhhhh!
Okay, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you've researched it and can make it plausible, but still...
And haven't you ever noticed that the great majority of characters in this galaxy don't have English names... probably because there is no English because there is no Earth?
(negative, possibly nitpicky)

chapter 4
Okay, this is REALLY interesting. And it explains a lot about the movies.
I can't see Darth Vader thinking "crap", though. "Shit", maybe. Maybe.
(Mixed, nitpicky)

chapter 5
I assume this isn't complete, because there's still the stormtrooper to deal with, right?
(totally neutral)

chapter 6
This is going to get confusing with all the doubles, but I can't wait to see what happens next!
(Positive, includes some hint of confusion)

chapter 7
Chains of clones... wow...
I think I know where Johnny Doe comes from now.
I pretty much love this story, now, all because of LTWTL. Awesome! And the WTF was perfectly placed.
(Positive, I'm not sure if me saying something positive about one word is nitpicky...)

chapter 9
Okay, to begin with, Leia doesn't really need a lie detector test, though she probably doesn't know this. She has some Force powers, so she has to be a good enough lie detector herself. But also, if someone's good enough to look completely genuine to a politician, chances are great that he's good enough to fool the lie detector, too. So... well, if I were her, I'd watch what I said around him.
I KNEW [SPOILER]! Yay!
R2 is AWESOME. I always loved him, and it's great to understand his thoughts. I wish nobody had ever come up with the idea of writing it "Artoo," though. Ridiculous. Especially when it's in narration, not dialogue. And I seem to be the only person in the world who feels this way. Ugh.
(mixed, nitpicky about the fandom)

chapter 10
I got confused about the time jump. That might be my fault, though; I'm distracted by a very bad internet connection.
So he's a natural pilot. We should have known. :D If Leia *really* likes him it could be because of genetic attraction - people are often attracted to close relatives they didn't grow up with. It's true.
(Positive except a bit of confusion)

chapter 13
“Lamented sadly”? A bit redundant? The whole point of using a word like “lamented” is to avoid an adverb.
I don't like those descriptions of Yoda as a "troll". I mean, it's weird because we don't know what a troll is (there are so many opinions), and where do they get the word from? Are their fairy tales like ours? Wouldn't they have different ideas of strange-looking creatures?
So is this the real Yoda or not... I can't remember!
So that's why stormtroopers can't shoot straight.
(negative, and he went crazy)

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