https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ouV0di1a__mTOV8jb7Nq0YiNQkoks96lt3oRsU4Wo7g/edit?usp=sharing

Behold Valon's updated bio. He's overall more level-headed now, his profile is more detailed, and he's kept his hat addiction.

Any thoughts?

I'm sorry if this sounds discouraging or otherwise bad, but I'm not exactly the best at wording certain things...

There's a lot of ideas that could work here, but there's also a not of things that people generally do not want around here (torture and so on). You may want to polish things up and remove the things that go against how people see the setting.

That second paragraph, and the first sentence of the first, are completely gone. He is now overall more cool-headed, but also slightly irritable. Not a hair-trigger temper, but he can lose his patience.

Not sure what else to do, though.

Just thought I'd give you this handy dandy link spammage.

First off, the Wiki page for Permission. It can be pretty helpful in working some things out with Agents, as someone who has been working on agents for at least 3 months, on and off.

Secondly, the Permission Self-Check. I know it's on the Permission page, but I had a hard time finding it anyway. It's good for checking whether you're ready to ask for permission. This is probably because that's what it was made for.

Now, here's the link to a collection of missions, the Original Series and other tidbits. Reading always helps, and seeing other agents in missions is good for brainstorming ideas that work. And if you've read them, eh, no harm in re-reading.

Finally, a picture of a rabbit with a top hat. Because why not? And I know that sometimes people get upset at criticism, good or bad, so I felt a cute picture would be a nice idea.

Good luck in working out ideas for agents, and remember - have fun while you're doing it! All stress and no fun makes the PPC a boring place.

Having read this description and looked at the pictures, I'm not entirely sure you understand what the PPC is all about.

Torture, and 'taking his frustration out on them personally', is most emphatically not what we do. PPC stories are, er, funny: that's kind of the point. Valon isn't funny: he's scary. Yes, you've added some quirks, but you've added them to a violent psychopath who 'turns off his sense of empathy' and, for bonus points, 'spends a lot of time ogling female Agents and canonicals' - including when he's an empathyless torture-fiend. That is not someone I can see fitting into the PPC.

So: I'd like to recommend you read around the subject more. I note on your intro thread you say you've read Laburnum's missions: I'm aware that they make up a large chunk of our Redwall stuff, but they're really not representative of the PPC as a whole. I see you are (or were) also reading the Original Series, which is good - we try to model our agents off Jay and Acacia, with different characters but the same basic outlook of 'Doing this job, have to have a sense of humour, get angry sometimes but try to stay professional'.

So: read some more missions! Unfortunately I don't appear to share any fandoms with you - well, a couple, but I don't recall any missions set in them - but I can point you at the Killed Badfic list. To get a good feel for what the PPC's like, try avoiding the high-rated/NSFW stuff and reading some of the K+/T material.

For one specific (non-mission, but PPC)recommendation, the Irish Samurai recently posted an interlude to do with Abhorsen: The Mini-Mogget Adoption Agency. I think it gets over the feel of the PPC very well.

hS

One, torture is not allowed. Even for Sues. It's a bad idea. Killing them slowly, maybe, but nobody is supposed to torture. It ticks off the Flowers, because it's Black Cat methodology and also seriously not cool.

Two, you are way too new to start up Permission ideas. I realize this wasn't an official request, but keep it private until you've got more parts of the Agent finalized and the Board gets to know you.

Three, his personality traits seem contradictory. Psychopathic rage and cool tolerance of others, for example. I realize you're still hammering him out, but read the bio beforehand and make sure it looks consistent.

Without that, it's not that bad. The hat obsession could potentially lead to a few fun scenes, and the physical description seems all right. You could really enhance him by bringing along a partner who opposes him in terms of knowledge type and reactions to situations, especially since doing so would help justify the "knows about everything" bit if you give him, say, a very ditzy partner. The partner dynamic is why you see so many passionate/stoic pairs or rageful/joyful pairs. Odd couples are fun and help with characterization.

You've created about three threads in a row. That's a little much especially since your introduction post is still on the front page. That's also an indicator that it is a bit too early for you to be discussing Agents with the Board.

If you really need advice, I suggest asking someone via email or the IRC.

That being said, is it necessary to have two different personalities for an Agent dependant on what he's doing? Suggesting that an Agent is only sane off duty is underestimating HQ's ability to turn someone insane. And last time I checked, Sues also had shoddy split personalities like that.

Take a step back, relax, and just participate in the topics already on the Board. We're in no rush.

First off, torturing Sues is a no-go. And the way it's described, like that happens constantly, he sounds like he's a psychopath on or off duty. The pictures don't help with that.