Subject: I'll help.
Author:
Posted on: 2010-04-08 03:06:00 UTC
Just delete any notes I make before you post :P
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Beta Request by
on 2010-04-07 15:53:00 UTC
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I have finished Miah and Cali's next Mission, and I am looking for a beta.
I always need particular help with grammar.
This is set in NCIS, but the charges all relate to writing like a chimpanzee, so you do not need to have even heard of NCIS to make sense of this Mission.
https://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AdAslkokw01-ZGdrN3ZuZDZfOGhtZ3RtY2Nt&hl=en
"Of Glitter and Men" In which Miah makes kissy noises, Cali rescues four children, and the NCIS continua is saved from a fluffy, wangst!Sue and her plague of glitter. -
Mission Plug by
on 2010-04-09 00:47:00 UTC
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"Of Glitter and Men"
http://miah-arthur.livejournal.com/6127.html
Summary: Miah makes kissy noises, Castor enjoys pumpkin guts a bit too much, Cali rescues four children, and the NCIS continua is saved from a fluffy, wangst!Sue and her plague of glitter. -
I'll help. by
on 2010-04-08 03:06:00 UTC
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Just delete any notes I make before you post :P
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Thank you (nm) by
on 2010-04-08 03:08:00 UTC
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Re: Beta Request by
on 2010-04-07 21:09:00 UTC
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I haven't seen any major problems, only minor spelling and grammar stuff. Okay...you capitalized every instance of the word 'Mission' even when it's not neccesarily a PPC mission, you used a comma instead of a question mark right at the beginning (What about the cat), and a few more pronouns would probably make things flow better. The execution scene is slightly vauge, and you're using commas too sparsely (or is that an effect of the Sue on the wordworld? It would be interesting if it was). Other than that, it's really very nicely done; in my veiw, the mission's funny, the characters are well-written, just fix the mechanics and it will be really good when its posted.
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Re: Beta Request by
on 2010-04-07 22:15:00 UTC
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Would you be willing to mark (like in a different color) the places I have missed commas. Although, it would be funny to blame it on the Suethor, I have a serious problem with grammar, all by myself, especially for commas. That is why I don't post stuff for the whole world to see without using a beta, unlike that particular Suethor. If a large part of the charging involves grammar and it is coming from me, you know it has to be bad.
Thank you for helping me out. If it doesn't involve grammar, I will be happy to read over something for you later. -
Re: Beta Request by
on 2010-04-07 21:11:00 UTC
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And I forgot to log in again. This is going to be annoying.