Subject: Ah, welcome, comrade!
Author:
Posted on: 2009-04-10 20:02:00 UTC

Welcome to our bizarre, barely sane world, my friend. Please take a complimentary salted walnut. By the off chance one of them starts talking to you, I implore you to ignore its advice. Don't worry, though, it will never threaten to stab you.

My agents welcome you, and both of them hope that the arrival of your agents will lessen the workload for them. Though I doubt that.

I gift you with a jar containing a live Portuguese man o' war, and this sock full of rocks. I'm sure you'll find them useful.

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