Subject: Ah shoite, doublepost (nm)
Author:
Posted on: 2014-07-28 04:26:00 UTC
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Potterverse Marauder-Era Sue by
on 2014-07-24 13:49:00 UTC
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10045176/1/Running
This starts out a rather textbook Sue--dead mother from whom she inherited Speshul powers, abusive father who somehow thinks it's a good idea to beat up his ridiculously overpowered daughter--and then just gets worse. She becomes friends with the Marauders despite their canonical hate of Slytherins, she disses Hufflepuffs (okay, so does everyone), she commandeers a class of Slughorn's for some reason, and her best friend thinks she needs a husband at sixteen. Also, it looks like BOTH Sirius and Remus have a thing for her.
And as if all that wasn't bad enough, Voldemort wants to rape and impregnate her. And tries to have a bunch of Slytherins her year--some of whom WEREN'T even at Hogwarts then if the author had any idea of proper chronology--rape her first.
Ugh.
I do have this to say, though, it's got a more sympathetic student-age Peter Pettigrew than I usually see. One that James and Sirius could have actually befriended.
Anyway, this is only after the first two chapters. I'm sure it doesn't get better. After I get some Agents together and get permission, I might take this one. -
You can claim things without permission. (nm) by
on 2014-07-27 11:54:00 UTC
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How much damage would this do to canon? by
on 2014-07-26 13:05:00 UTC
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The first chapter pretty much sums it up. They're character replacements, they'll return to copy of their world, and it's a deliberately stupid meta!pwp.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2465079/1/Self-Insert-Authoress-Tripe -
Two TF2/MLP crossovers by
on 2014-07-26 11:17:00 UTC
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Not really sure if these are sporkable (been a while) but here goes nothing.
First up, from FIMFiction, we have "My Little Fortress: Teamwork is Magic". This one seems pretty solid charicterization wise and really just needs a red pen, if you overlook a minor plothole (Who designed the pony outfits, the Team or Rarity?!) a major canon break at the end (spoiler:the Team supposedly never visits their families and said families think they're dead, despite in-canon their being shown in their homes-heck, just look at the canon comics for the "WAR!" update, it shows Demoman taking care of his mother in his mansion for crying out loud), and (spoiler) the Medic's gun supposedly breaking down for no reason to force the ponification of the Engineer.
Next up, fresh from the sewage of the Pit of Voles, we have "friendship and violence" (sic), a fic that seems to have a much better grasp of TF2 canon (unlike the previous fic's utter disregard for things like the WAR! update comic, this one even references the WAR! update's comic) at the time it was written (it's been on hiatus for a while and hopefully forever). However, it reeks of grammatical errors (mainly capitalization) and is really badly structured. The story itself seems pretty solid sometimes, but I'll leave you guys to decide that one.
LINKS:
My Little Fortress: Teamwork is Magic
friendship and violence - OH HEY DEVIANTART HAS MORE by on 2014-07-26 11:33:00 UTC Reply
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My sympathy to you all. by
on 2014-07-26 05:39:00 UTC
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Also, here's one set in the canon era: https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10471737/1/In-Life-and-Death-and-Fire-and-Ice
I call character replacements. Even someone as weird as Luna would neither time travel in order to "beat up Dumbledore" nor casually reveal major worldview-shattering details to anyone in the past. -
I had to stop a few sentences in. (nm) by
on 2014-07-27 11:47:00 UTC
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Why do I do this to myself? by
on 2014-07-25 23:11:00 UTC
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I'm continuing on the path of scrolling the Pit for badfic, and have now unearthed a dark!Harry--which, okay, I can see that being done well, but not when twelve-year-old Harry admits to the diary horcrux--right after seeing the memory of Tom Riddle accusing Hagrid, the first person Harry remembers being nice to him, of opening the Chamber--that he finds the panic with the basilisk funny.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10347022/1/Shared-Diary-of-Orphans
Good luck, if you want to read it. It also features the diary somehow knowing all about events that happened after Riddle graduated, despite there being no sensible way for Ginny to have told him, Riddle saying he wouldn't kill Muggleborns, Harry at twelve saying that he thinks he's dark and not being upset by this...and, in the prologue, 'little horcrux' being used as a pet name.
In addition to that rather creepy bit, there's the fact that one conversation with Riddle in which Dumbledore was never mentioned led Harry to conclude that Dumbledore had staged the entire first book. Also, Dumbledore said Harry was exaggerating the way the Dursleys treated him, which didn't happen anywhere in canon. There's some funny irony in that Harry can't wait to get away from Ron, who is an 'annoying, bigoted moron,'...so he can go talk to Tom Riddle. Who of course is nothing near bigoted, right?
And Hermione is neglected by her parents and is studying the Dark Arts. Right.
The only good thing about this is that it's only five chapters so far, although it still could be updated. -
'nother fic to add to the pile. by
on 2014-07-25 22:05:00 UTC
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8502434/1/The-Extiction
Mass Effect/Warhammer 40k crossover, 'speshul' characters, fairly obvious lack of knowledge about anything in depth to do with 40k, bad SPaG. And all this gathered from the first chapter which is nothing more than a character sheet.
Unfortunately probably not long enough to kill just yet. But definitely bad enough to be sporked when it is.
Storme Hawk. -
Can I claim this? (nm) by
on 2014-07-28 04:25:00 UTC
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Can I claim this? (nm) by
on 2014-07-28 01:33:00 UTC
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Ah shoite, doublepost (nm) by
on 2014-07-28 04:26:00 UTC
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Oh, and warning for occasional swear words (nm) by
on 2014-07-25 22:06:00 UTC
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And now Suemionie by
on 2014-07-25 21:35:00 UTC
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10304298/1/What-the-Heart-Wants
And here, we have an excellent example of a Mary Sue masquerading as Hermione. Or, I'm sorry, 'Hermionie,' who has, true to form, changed a lot over the summer. Anything describing Hermione's hair as 'sexy ringlets' is bad, right? Especially if Hermione's doing the describing, in the first person. Also either OOC or replaced Draco, as he's happy that his father got the Dementor's Kiss. Also, it's rated M on the Pit, as a warning.
Other than that, in the way of problems, there's a lot of gratuitous capitalization and OOC canons, tense changes--really really bad tense changes--lack of proper punctuation (I think the author has something against question marks and commas), Ron-bashing, creation of uncanonical locations (ie the Head Boy/Girl Common Room with only one bathroom), bad spelling, making Hermione a total Sue, changing the Hogwarts uniform, lack of consistency regarding the Hogwarts uniform...this is from four out of eleven chapters. I doubt it gets better. -
Re: And now Suemionie by
on 2014-07-25 21:57:00 UTC
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6'2 Golden boy? Wedge Converse?
Flipping to the last chapter... would eating a banana really do that to a guy? Do guys really joke about that? Would Draco submit to being called Drake? What is Hermione doing in Slitherine common room followed by a Weasley?
Crashing lips? Are people you like supposed to taste wonderful? Unless they're teasing, Draco and Hermione are going to do it. -
Whoop, someone catch that Mini-Aragog! (nm) (nm) by
on 2014-07-28 14:12:00 UTC
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This one might have been missed last time by
on 2014-07-25 17:55:00 UTC
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8867929/1/The-Knights-of-Equestria
Six bronies in MLP. One of them has so many mental problems that it's unbelievable.
Any time I try to decipher it, my brain starts to run into my shoes... I should start MTS'ing it just to see if I can mission it. -
Oww... by
on 2014-07-25 21:20:00 UTC
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That author has a bad case of indecipherable-wall-of-text. And also incredibly stilted and hard-to-read description. I'm not very familiar with the canon, so I can't offer any critique there, but best of luck if you try to mission it.
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New favorite typo. by
on 2014-07-25 04:28:00 UTC
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Minuets are very, very different than minutes.
- Minuets by on 2014-07-28 12:27:00 UTC Reply
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Ooh, minuets! by
on 2014-07-25 13:46:00 UTC
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I can still play Minuet in G Major, which is simple but really really fun. :) Have you ever heard heard Toccata in D Minor? It's probably better known as the Haunted House theme.
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Jak series for PS2 is it missionable? by
on 2014-07-25 00:44:00 UTC
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4478725/1/
Excessive ampersands, chatspeak.
For those who don't know, Light Jak and Dark Jak are supposed to be an angel form and a demon form for Jak. -
Re: Jak series for PS2 is it missionable? by
on 2014-07-25 01:52:00 UTC
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I am convinced that FF.net is engaging in an organized conspiracy to ruin my childhood.
Seriously though, WTFampersands? Also, WTFtalkingtocharactersinauthorsnotes? -
Re: Jak series for PS2 is it missionable? by
on 2014-07-25 02:00:00 UTC
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The talking to characters in author's notes was fairly standard in the LoKain series as well during that time.
Hmmm, are AN script-skits chargeable? -
I don't know about always, but THESE ones are... (nm) by
on 2014-07-25 02:01:00 UTC
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Urk. by
on 2014-07-25 01:42:00 UTC
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Yes, Jak is missionable, and this fic needs to go and die in a fire somewhere because urk self insert and urk the formatting makes my eyes bleed and urk ampersands.
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Here's another Marauder Era. by
on 2014-07-24 16:33:00 UTC
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10156950/1/Stuck-in-Harry-Potter It's been a while since I read Harry Potter, but they have a lot of "Stuck In" stories. The biggest thing I see wrong in the first chapter is that she recognizes where she is from an obscure clue.
Their Last Airbender fic looks sporkable with the movieverse contamination and the inserts being multi-benders. -
Huh by
on 2014-07-24 16:47:00 UTC
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I don't think I've ever seen a self-insert into the Crouch family before...that's a new one.
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Next time, by
on 2014-07-24 14:17:00 UTC
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let's attach new badfics to existing badfic posts, like the one two posts down, okay? Each post pushes a new one off the back of our records.
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Sorry! by
on 2014-07-24 14:27:00 UTC
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Sorry, I just didn't think. My bad!
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No problem. (nm) by
on 2014-07-24 14:32:00 UTC
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KILL IT WITH FIRE. by
on 2014-07-24 14:04:00 UTC
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Marauder's Era Sues are the ones I hate the most. This b***h need to DIE. Nobody messes with the Marauders. NOBODY.
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The worst has happened by
on 2014-07-24 15:30:00 UTC
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Not only has she messed around with the timeline to the point where the Marauders are only starting to become animagi in their sixth year--I'm pretty sure it took them years of study in canon, and now they're saying it'll be done by Christmas--
The Sue HEALED REMUS'S LYCANTHROPY. Through magic necromancer powers. Also, yeah, she's a necromancer. Why do people do this to canon?
Also, she randomly skips school to go shopping for anachronistic brands, and dances with Dumbledore, and has a bad case of 'single tear' at one moment.
Someone really needs to kill this lady. -
WHAT??? by
on 2014-07-24 19:02:00 UTC
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IT TOOK THEM YEARS TO LEARN AND MANAGED IT IN THEIR FIFTH YEAR. F**K THIS GIRL SIDEWAYS WITH A RUSTY METAL CACTUS.
WHY DID SHE HEAL HIS LYCANTHOPY HOW DID SHE LEARN NECROMANCY I'M CAPSLOCK RAGING AAAAAAGHHHH -
Whoa. by
on 2014-07-24 23:43:00 UTC
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-Offers Bleeptea, scones and jam-
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Thanks... by
on 2014-07-25 02:06:00 UTC
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Bleeptea, scones and jam are much appreciated.
This lady pisses me off. She also has ridiculous mood swings and can do wandless magic. Also, is Improbably Timed Menstruation a charge? -
I know by
on 2014-07-24 19:14:00 UTC
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Apparently she was born with it--the necromancy, that is. Which is why Voldemort wants her on his side. So, of course, all the death eaters alienate her and treat her horribly, because that makes total sense.
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It just gets WORSE by
on 2014-07-24 14:21:00 UTC
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Yeah, everything I mentioned? It turns out in the latest chapter that the Marauders have only known her for a WEEK. I wasn't sure how much time had passed, but I was hoping that it was closer to a month...
...on a lighter note, though, apparently if she has Voldemort's kid, the war will be over in 'a matter of minuets.'
Also, she apparently routinely seriously injures people who insult, threaten, or hit her but has never stood up against her father.
It just keeps getting worse. She shows no respect to the teachers and basically decides to kill a girl for slapping her. -
Who claimed "My Immortal"? by
on 2014-07-26 05:07:00 UTC
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Off topic, but I saw on the wiki that the story was claimed. If so, who claimed it?
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It always has been claimed. by
on 2014-07-26 13:08:00 UTC
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As far as I know, the fic is claimed and will remain claimed for perpetuity, hint hint.
Why spork what is already perfect?