Subject: Very well done, sirs. (nm)
Author:
Posted on: 2014-04-06 15:03:00 UTC
-
New mission! by
on 2014-04-05 22:29:00 UTC
Reply
Took me some time, but I've finished my latest mission.
-Drumroll-
Of Course I Still Love You, in which Des gets a new partner and they tackle an unusual Sue.
Concrit is welcome, as always.
The following mini-Eyeballs, rescued in this mission, are up for adoption: See Elfs, Wide Elfs, Drizzt Do-Urden, Faerun, Elv and start elf.
The Sue Sword Twinkledeath was looted by the agents. -
Re: Mission by
on 2014-04-07 06:34:00 UTC
Reply
I like the beginning of this mission immensely. Agent Desdendelle's reaction to Anebrin's snapping feels realistic, and I can empathize with that. The Librarian's introduction starts out strong, with the Time Lord's straightforwardness and lack of emotional reaction serving as a good counterpoint to Agent Des's attitude.
Once the mission gets going, though, it seems like the Librarian fades into the background. Most of his dialogue during the mission is basically just re-statements of what's happening around him ("You are telling me that this… author… did not research their subject before writing about it?") or leading questions that allow Des to tutor him in mission basics ("... How do you know the… author misspelled anything?") He doesn't express much of a personality during all this interplay, or even much in the way of Time Lordiness, apart from one comment about the flow of time being affected by the fic. It's good to show a new agent reacting to their first badfic, but the Librarian hardly reacts at all--he just talks about it. I hope he'll show more of his personality in future missions.
Also, a note about the minis: technically, Forgotten Realms already had mini-Slayers as its mini; however, based on when you were talking about this mission in the chat, you couldn't possibly have known that, because I hadn't put it on the wiki until after you started writing. Since all surviving mentions of mini-Slayers apart from that Directory are gone, and no one is recorded as having adopted any, I'll happily support mini-Eyeballs as the official mini type. (Now go make them a page, please. I don't know much about FR!) -
Re: Mission by
on 2014-04-07 20:01:00 UTC
Reply
First of all, thanks for the concrit.
The Librarian fading into the background is a product of two main things. One, this is his first mission, so he can't really snark yet - he doesn't get what's going on, basically, and the Notary isn't involved, so he doesn't have someone to shout at. Two, maybe on hindsight I should've used a Doctor Who badfic as his first mission, as it would have elicited a stronger reaction from him; simply put, he doesn't care enough about FR now.
As to the Minis, I saw something about Baldur's Gate having mini-Slayers in the wiki (and to be honest, since I've never progressed much in that game or its sequel, I have no idea what mini-Slayers even look like), but that was after I wrote the mission... and since you support the mini-Eyeballs, we'll use that. I'll write a page, alright. -
We could also . . . by
on 2014-04-08 06:00:00 UTC
Reply
use mini-Eyeballs as the main FR continuum's mini, and the mini-Slayer as the mini for the BG games, since they seem to be a spin-off of sorts. That way, the old OFU author still has some input in the matter.
-
Seems legit. by
on 2014-04-08 10:35:00 UTC
Reply
Page incoming when I return from the army.
-
Very well done, sirs. (nm) by
on 2014-04-06 15:03:00 UTC
Reply
-
Sirs...? by
on 2014-04-06 19:34:00 UTC
Reply
Last time I checked, there was only one of me (though there's a guy with my name in another unit that I know of).
-
Oooh, lovely fun! by
on 2014-04-06 04:45:00 UTC
Reply
Relatively low-key mission, for the most part, mostly focused on character interaction, which was wonderful. I love the dynamic you set up between Des and the Librarian. Greatly amusing!
-Aila -
Mini-Boarder? by
on 2014-04-06 01:56:00 UTC
Reply
Does a misspelling in the credits (sonofheaven176, no underscores) create a mini?
-
Not quite. by
on 2014-04-06 07:09:00 UTC
Reply
It has been edited out of existence.
-
Ooooh! Dibs on any spare Eyeballs! by
on 2014-04-06 00:38:00 UTC
Reply
Biotech is about the only gadgetry Wobbles has access to more complicated than a sock full of marbles. I'm fairly certain a stable of more or less sane minis would be something she'd enjoy.
Plus, the Notary would haaaaaate it. Which is all to the good. =] -
Clarification by
on 2014-04-06 07:11:00 UTC
Reply
Eyeballs are basically mini Beholders, not actual eyeballs, so they're basically mini-mini-Beholders.
-
Wobbles would still love him. by
on 2014-04-06 12:26:00 UTC
Reply
Also keep him on a little lead as an attack Eyeball, all floaty and cuddly and so forth. Wobbles is a bit like Hagrid in that regard; she's a friend to all living creatures, even the ones that bite and sting and maim and so on.
-
Oh, it's better than that. by
on 2014-04-06 20:26:00 UTC
Reply
Not only do Eyeballs bite, they can use their eye beams to cast Cause Fear, Daze, Mage Hand and Frost. They're also Selfish Evil.
-
She does love a challenge... by
on 2014-04-07 12:42:00 UTC
Reply
She's also largely indifferent to physical pain what with slapstick being her day job. Oh well, taming anything requires love and friendship, so she's probably got half a chance!
Who am I kidding, it'd end in failure. -
Well... by
on 2014-04-07 20:04:00 UTC
Reply
The Librarian would be delighted to let Wobbles and the Notary take care of the mini-Eyeballs. There are already enough minis in RC log e (Doctor who, Arctic circle and another one whose name eludes me at the moment), and he'd love to see the Notary squirm.
-
How that ended up. by
on 2014-04-08 00:13:00 UTC
Reply
"So, how do you like our new pets, Agent Photo Free?"
"OH SWEET RASSILON THEY'RE IN MY HAIR!"
"Good, good." -
Rassafrassafrassin' brick-thick pudgy clown fingers... by
on 2014-04-06 00:50:00 UTC
Reply
I clicked the wrong button when posting my previous missive and didn't talk about the mission itself.
Anyway, I really enjoyed that. Des and the Librarian have great chemistry and the fic's collection of idiocy made for some really funny moments. Well done! =] -
this gives me a good idea by
on 2014-04-06 01:17:00 UTC
Reply
I enjoyed this one too.
the stupid writing and the librarian's inexperience made for one funny story.
