Subject: ...this should be fun.
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Posted on: 2014-04-06 16:07:00 UTC

'The Right Kind of Doctor', or Three Jacks Walk Into A Plothole [Torchwood PPC Mission]
This trailer has been approved for general audiences
The screen is black
NARRATOR: In a land of words and a time of badfic, the destiny of a great canon rests on the shoulders of a character replacement. His name...Jacques.
(cut to Jacques Bonnefoy, dancing around his RC. He is waving a rapier around and singing at the top of his lungs.)
NARRATOR: When Jacques Bonnefoy gets a call...
(shot of Jacques silencing the console)
NARRATOR: ...he will return to Torchwood to save the day.
(shot of Jacques stepping out of a portal)
JACK: (offscreen) I was wondering when you'd get here.
JACQUES: I need your help.
(shot of Jacques staring at a Sue in horror; cut to him talking angrily into his wriststrap)
NARRATOR: The task before him will not be easy.
(cut to Jacques watching angrily as in-fic Jack yells at his Sue daughter)
FIC!JACK: What are you wearing?!
(flash; camera zooms in on fic!Jack)
FIC!JACK: Your only 17!
(flash; camera zooms out. Jacques is glaring)
NARRATOR: And to keep his sanity...
(shot of Jacques turning sharply and walking through a portal)
NARRATOR: He will seek out help.
(shot of Ianto Jones, eyebrows raised)
(shot of Toshiko Sato, shaking her head slowly)
(shot of Jack Harkness, grinning and straightening his coat)
NARRATOR: This year
(shot of Ianto and Jacques laughing. Jacques is waving his arms around as he makes a point)
NARRATOR: Experience the chaos.
(flash: shot of Jacques and Jack confronting fic!Jack)
(flash: shot of fic!Jack yelling, red-faced, as the Sue clings to Gwen)
(flash: shot of Ianto grinning. Flash: shot of a girl snatching a book from the Sue's hands and throwing it into the garbage. Flash: Jacques glares at the fic; Jack turns Jacques' head and kisses him)
(cut to black)
(fade-in shot of Jacques standing surrounded by mini-Reapers and smiling at fic!Jack)
JACQUES: I've got an idea.
(flash: a house in the middle of nowhere. Flash: Gwen and Rhys running out of the house. Flash: a helicopter swings through the sky, shooting as it goes. Flash: Gwen stands up in the back of a careening vehicle and prepares to fire a bazooka.)
(Shot: back to Jacques, now smirking)
JACQUES: And you are not going to like it.
(cut to black. Title slowly expands to fill the screen)
Three Jacks Walk Into A Plothole
Coming later this year

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