Okay... by
Herr Wozzeck
on 2013-10-23 03:57:00 UTC
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Let's do this!
Lasting Damage:
Now this was a sweet little thing. I don't have too much to say about it, 'cause it was a sweet little piece, it had good interactions with the characters, and really, that's all you need from an interlude, y'know?
So yeah, this was good. Now on to the next one...
End in Tears:
Okay, this one I did have a slight issue with: I think the main problem is that the bulk of the action just goes by too quickly. I think that mostly, it might be a function of the fact that, for a PPC mission, there's almost nothing about the fic it's snarking in there. The vast majority of the mission was summary, with barely enough ficbit to qualify as a proper PPC mission.
And yes, I get that End in Tears was less about the Suefic and more about the culmination of Anebrin's snapping, but I feel that you could indeed still have gotten that across even while showing a little more of the Suefic. I don't know: I get your intent, but at the same time I feel like your intent basically sacrificed the fic being sporked for the sake of character development, which is not something I feel should be done in a PPC mission.
I don't know. Color me a little less than impressed with this one.
Lasting Damage made me cry, almost. by
Ailavyn Siniyash
on 2013-10-23 01:53:00 UTC
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I haven't read End In Tears yet, but considering the little glimpse we got of Anebrin's desperation in Lasting Damage, and the fact that you said his story ends there, I can only imagine what happens.
-Aila