Subject: Thoughts
Author:
Posted on: 2013-08-20 14:41:00 UTC

You did a fantastic job on these. It's amazing that you can create such sympathy for your characters in so few words. Very well-written and I'd love to read more of your work. :)

The only criticism I could possibly offer is that they're both too short. Even realizing that they were flash fiction or contest entries of some sort, I'd really like to see them extended. Like, did Angela feel any remorse about failing to protect Morgan? Does he die? And what happened leading up to the events in 'Visions?' Why do the characters need masks? What is a Toa, anyway? Or the other strange names, for that matter? Just a few thoughts if you were ever to add on.

-- Len

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