This was a hard read, by
Hieronymus Graubart
on 2015-07-22 20:37:00 UTC
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but it was totally worth it. And I don’t even know much about Gallifrey.
Some typos:
“Close. Type 77,” announced the Guardsman, still looking the screen.
There’s probably a word missing before "the screen”.
The Guardsman begrudgingly gave her his tools and stomped over the the terminal, not looking at the Reader.
A TARDIS is a marvel of engineering—as beautiful as it is precariously perched on the brink of total dimensional singularity.
I don’t understand the techno-babble, but I’m not entirely sure whether this should not be "the brink of a total dimensional singularity".
HG
In a word: Fascinating by
Tira
on 2015-07-20 06:08:00 UTC
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My knowledge of Doctor Who is pretty cursory - just the kind of stuff you pick up from watching the show mostly to ogle David Tennant. This makes me want to really dig into the history of the setting, so I can understand all the subtle nuances going on right now. Because I am absolutely certain they are incredibly and fascinating, but I think I'm missing out on a lot of them.
One weird thing I noticed - on page eleven, there are a couple of references to the Notary as being male. Either she regenerated and I didn't notice, or you might want to go back and edit that.