"Welcome to Imladris I Haven't a Clue. We are all here at this council to discuss an ancient evil that has been awoken. A shadow long forgotten has risen again out of the distant past. If unstopped it will bring untold horror and destruction to all in Middle-earth.
"How can something so old cause so much suffering? Let's meet the teams."
"Éowyn's my sister." SLAP! "She's my daughter." SLAP! "She's my sister-daughter."
F/X: SHOP DOOR
ARAGORN: Hello, anybody there?
LEGOLAS: Hello. I'm Legolas and this is my friend Gimli.
GIMLI: Yes, and we are your Bona Adventurers.
ARAGORN: Well, my name is Aragorn, son of Arathorn, and I—
GIMLI: Ooh look, Legs! It's Mr. 'Orn.
LEGOLAS: Oh, yes. Mr. 'Orn, how bona to Elbereth you dolly old eek.
ARAGORN: Thank you. Wait a minute. To Elbereth?
GIMLI: Yes, it means to Varda.
LEGOLAS: That's your actual Elvish.
Legolas by Laura Palmer
Legolas was riding along the woods and one day he found a body whaped in plastic...
And for a non LotR one...