Elaborating on the formatting problem SMF mentioned by
Hieronymus Graubart
on 2015-06-11 08:17:00 UTC
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It looks like the height of the lines is lower than the characters’ height, and it starts with this quote:
Twilight made an observation. “I'm noticing a pattern here. There seem to be different numbers of pictures for each of us. Who has the least?”
The next lines of the mission are still okay, but then the badfic’s formatting spills over into the mission, beginning with:
“That’s a horrible excuse, you’d have to be stupid or drunk to believe that,” Rina hissed. “And Valon, your Stu is creeping me out.”
(I may have seen something similar in other GDocs, but didn’t pay attention then. I have no idea whether this kind of glitch is visible before you set the GDoc to "published" or how to avoid or fix it.)
No other nitpicks, and congrats for doing a good job there.
HG
Good work! by
eatpraylove
on 2015-06-11 03:25:00 UTC
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I loved the part at the end where you turned the guy's shack into a clubhouse for the minis XD
Response ficlet! by
SkarmorySilver
on 2015-06-10 13:56:00 UTC
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RC #227:
"Well," said Falchion as he read the mission report, "it was about time somebody else in our department killed a badfic of their own creation."
"To be quite honest, I will have to say 'au contraire' to the notion that you were the one who wrote my homefic," Ripper replied. "I was angry at you back then because I thought you were the Stu, not the writer."
"All the same, Terrordactyl was a self-insert. Isn't that the same thing? I mean, Midnight Green was one too as far as Valon is concerned."
"...Huh. Good point."
"At any rate, I have to give it to Valon - he handled things a lot better than we did. I don't think Rosie's going to forget being sent to Medical for heart failure anytime soon!"
Ripper blinked in surprise. "Heart failure?"
"Did I tell you that? I think I did. Did I?"
"...I don't remember, honestly. I wasn't there, after all. Must've been what happened to that one antagonistic replacement, right?"
Falchion sighed and shook his head. "Apparently."
It was then that Ripper remembered something Falchion had said just now. "Wait, Midnight Green? Isn't that a Suvian name in of itself?"
"Not in the context of My Little Pony. Especially the latest Friendship is Magic generation."
"You have a little pony?"
Falchion stared at him, open-beaked, and then facewinged in silent laughter. "Oh, Ripper... You really do need to get out more."
**********
Fantastic work, all in all! There really should've been more horse puns from everybody, honestly, but I'll live. Like I said, the only thing I'm less than happy about is that Midnight Green didn't live and atone for his sins, because I was really hoping you'd recruit the guy and have an ex-Stu agent for once, but I'll let that slide because you guys explained your reasoning to me yesterday. And I can understand your loss of interest in this show - it happened to me too after Season 3, albeit for different reasons, though I do have plans to catch up on the rest of the episodes once I get a job and such.
Oh, and regarding "Raise This Barn": Whenever I hear that song (which is awesome btw), my walnut-sized brain always brings up the memetic Mondegreen of "Racist Barn". Mental note, take advantage of this in my next mission with Rayner...
I quite like it! by
Alleb
on 2015-06-10 03:09:00 UTC
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I got a really nice sense of both your characters, and I found the whole thing quite good!
Nice! ^^ by
SMF
on 2015-06-10 01:47:00 UTC
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That pun is terrible, which means of course that you two win everything. XD
There's something a bit wrong with the formatting (it's roughly 7/8ths through the mission): lines are overlapping. I can read them, but it's just a weird glitch-type thing. :/
That's all, though! ^^
I'm only about halfway through so far, but I already love it by
DawnFire
on 2015-06-10 01:18:00 UTC
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Things that stand out so far? The way it being Valon's old badfic is handled (very satisfying, somehow), Zeb saying that Valon and Kala smell like Rina around the Librarian (best bit of teasing yet, I think), and, most especially, Valon trying to figure out unicorn magic. That was just fantastic, that whole scene.
~DF