(broette? I'm not sure what the correct way to address you is)

As they say in the Daily Beast article, most of the major plot points have been leaked for a while now. This is just a summary of the play itself.

I apparently can't fiddle with the bot. That'll fall on Tomash I guess, since technically he's the only op.

What typo, though?

I always supported that typo.

There's a total of three or so people in the world who can make a decent story involving time travel, and I somehow doubt they were involved in this production.

I do find some joy in the irony of them destroying the canon that the fans were fans of in order to create fanservice for the fans who are now (very reasonably) upset because the canon has been ruined in their attempts to create fanservice.
It's a bit like improving the efficiency of your racehorse by breaking all of its legs and then strapping the creature to a large truck that's constantly driving in the opposite direction of the racetrack.

This has to be a joke. There is no way that this can be serious. It's either some form of joke or a very clever conspiracy, because there's no way that something that makes me want to drown myself in Bleepfee without even getting through the entire thing can come from the same person who wrote the Harry Potter books. They're obviously pulling some kind of joke to shock everybody into not speculating and ruining the plot of the play. That must be it.

"Every conversation in this alternate reality ends by people crossing their wrists and saying: For Voldemort and valor.

Every girl at Hogwarts is hoping Scorpius - known as the Scorpion King - will ask them to the Blood Ball. The other kids do his homework."

I'm pretty sure this was taken from the My Immortal version of the epilogue.

Remember Pottermore? That lovely little website containing backstory and why X didn't do Y or what have you?

As our investigations currently stand, the longest period that may be relived without the possibility of serious harm to the traveller or to time itself is around five hours. We have been able to encase single Hour-Reversal Charms, which are unstable and benefit from containment, in small, enchanted hour-glasses that may be worn around a witch or wizard’s neck and revolved according to the number of hours the user wishes to relive.

All attempts to travel back further than a few hours have resulted in catastrophic harm to the witch or wizard involved. It was not realised for many years why time travellers over great distances never survived their journeys. All such experiments have been abandoned since 1899, when Eloise Mintumble became trapped, for a period of five days, in the year 1402. Now we understand that her body had aged five centuries in its return to the present and, irreparably damaged, she died in St Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries shortly after we managed to retrieve her. What is more, her five days in the distant past caused great disturbance to the life paths of all those she met, changing the course of their lives so dramatically that no fewer than twenty-five of their descendants vanished in the present, having been “un-born”.

Finally, there were alarming signs, during the days following Madam Mintumble’s recovery, that time itself had been disturbed by such a serious breach of its laws. Tuesday following her reappearance lasted two and a half full days, whereas Thursday shot by in the space of four hours. The Ministry of Magic had a great deal of trouble in covering this up and since that time, the most stringent laws and penalties have been placed around those studying time travel.

Claiming that it was a "prototype" Time-Turner that didn't have the five-hour limit is exactly the sort of thing a Suethor would claim. The fact that time was pretty much fine after Albus and Scorpius' wild hijinks is exactly the sort of hand-waving a Sue would do. A girl claiming to be Voldemort's and Bellatrix' daughter is exactly something a Sue would do.

Conclusion: Jack Thorne is a Suethor.

Because he's the one who actually wrote the play; JK Rowling helped him and considers it canon (!!!), but she wasn't the main writer.

All I can say, if she considers this canon:

Yeah that is. Definitely something.