IÂ’m a bit confused here by
Hieronymus Graubart
on 2015-11-13 15:52:00 UTC
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I don’t think Totodile aren’t supposed to know Water Gun at level five, either, not if they learn moves at the same rate Chikorita do.
Is the double negation intentional? I admit that I don’t know how these pocket monsters work, but to me it sounds like this specific Totodile is supposed to know Water Gun, and it actually does, so where is the problem?
(I guess you tried to say that this starter Totodile is supposed to be on level five and thus shouldn’t have learned Water Gun yet, but Chris actually says that he thinks it should.)
HG
Good mission by
son_of_heaven176
on 2015-11-12 01:11:00 UTC
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Not much to say in terms of commentary: this was a good mission, and good work showing off your characters' reactions to the fic.
But of course, no SOH176 reply would be complete without corrections, so:
1) [pokémon trainer the mini-Missingno] laughed mockingly. “That mean I win! Mini one, pony-girl zero!”
Ami is in human disguise in this mission, yes? Then how did the mini know that Ami is a pony?
The same issue appears later:
“Fairy-boy, why you steal Mommy’s pizza?” asked sliver conference.
2) poképurse the mini-Missingno: Minis are created via misspellings of canonical names. But you've made clear in this very mission that there's no such thing in canon as a "poképurse". Hence there should be no mini.
3) The agents were teleported to Wendi’s general area again, but thanks to a glaring word error, she entered not the tall grass at the center of the park, but the same generic forest.
What word error? I did not catch anything that would have implied that the Sue went anywhere but the National Park.
But that aside, good mission.
Psst by
cattomboy/jebboy
on 2015-11-10 18:21:00 UTC
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You forgot a quotation mark after 'good memories of when you did.' in the intro