Subject: That was intentional.
Author:
Posted on: 2015-11-10 18:32:00 UTC
It shows that the quote continues over more than one paragraph. :)
Subject: That was intentional.
Author:
Posted on: 2015-11-10 18:32:00 UTC
It shows that the quote continues over more than one paragraph. :)
Chris and co. return to the Pokémon-verse for a doozy of a fanfic. Fortunately, it's not as much of one as I'd originally thought/planned. Shout-out to my awesome beta reading team, SkarmorySilver, Scapegrace, and Mattman The Comet.
Questions? Comments? Want a mini-Missingno? (Seriously, take one, I have too many.)
I don’t think Totodile aren’t supposed to know Water Gun at level five, either, not if they learn moves at the same rate Chikorita do.
Is the double negation intentional? I admit that I don’t know how these pocket monsters work, but to me it sounds like this specific Totodile is supposed to know Water Gun, and it actually does, so where is the problem?
(I guess you tried to say that this starter Totodile is supposed to be on level five and thus shouldn’t have learned Water Gun yet, but Chris actually says that he thinks it should.)
HG
Not much to say in terms of commentary: this was a good mission, and good work showing off your characters' reactions to the fic.
But of course, no SOH176 reply would be complete without corrections, so:
1) [pokémon trainer the mini-Missingno] laughed mockingly. “That mean I win! Mini one, pony-girl zero!”
Ami is in human disguise in this mission, yes? Then how did the mini know that Ami is a pony?
The same issue appears later:
“Fairy-boy, why you steal Mommy’s pizza?” asked sliver conference.
2) poképurse the mini-Missingno: Minis are created via misspellings of canonical names. But you've made clear in this very mission that there's no such thing in canon as a "poképurse". Hence there should be no mini.
3) The agents were teleported to Wendi’s general area again, but thanks to a glaring word error, she entered not the tall grass at the center of the park, but the same generic forest.
What word error? I did not catch anything that would have implied that the Sue went anywhere but the National Park.
But that aside, good mission.
I hadn't really thought about that aspect of mini-Missingno nicknaming people, whoopsie ^_^; I'll fix that as soon as I'm able.
In regards to "poképurse"...back in my first mission, the Sue made up a move called "psych-heal", which manifested as a mini. I was applying the same principle to our glitchy friend here.
Finally, the word error I talked about comes from this line before she spots a Beedrill: "I was venturing deeper into the forest to look for some really good bug pokémon." The only forest near or in National Park is the one outside its borders; the park itself is an open space with tall grass cut to look like a Poké Ball, as I'm sure you know. :)
You forgot a quotation mark after 'good memories of when you did.' in the intro
It shows that the quote continues over more than one paragraph. :)
You learn something new every day.