Subject: From the Minister of Distressing Statistics...
Author:
Posted on: 2017-03-23 06:00:00 UTC

Prime Minister,

It appears that the economy, both at home and across the entire globe, is in latrina. Given the direness of the situation, it may be time to make some harsh cuts to existing programs so as to bolster our GDP. We might possibly pass tax breaks for foreign investors? It is also for this reason that I argue we should not restrict banking bonuses. While this may strike some as odious, we must provide at least some corporate-centric incentives.

There are also multiple issues with crime and criminality in our fair nation. Organized crime, uncontrolled public drunkenness, lynch mobs—the entire situation is a dire one. Once again, I encourage us to—at the very least—increase the alcohol tax. Possibly even the drinking age. Eliminating the alcohol problem may also help alleviate some of our economic issues. It may not be popular, but neither is all the vomit in the gutters.

Yours respectfully,
PoorCynic, MoDS

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