Subject: Two amazing people were born today, and I wrote a thing for them.
Author:
Posted on: 2020-04-01 14:56:52 UTC

Don't read any further than this. Turn away from the screen, or bad things will happen.

Guess what, if you're already at this point, then too bad. You should not have continued reading after the first sentence. After all, I did say "Don't read any further than this."

Well, it's too late anyway. So here you go, I guess.

~ ~ ~

“There’s a customer out here looking for Instant Darkness Powder, Mr. Weasley and Mr. Weasley,” Verity poked her head around the curtain and said.

Fred and George shifted their attention momentarily from the experiment they were conducting to their magenta-robed employee. That one second of not focusing made the cauldron they were looking after explode. Verity flinched back a little. It was a big improvement from what she did about a month ago, when she saw her first explosion at the Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes. They had to forcibly silence her with magic so she wouldn’t scare away all the customers.

“Ow,” Fred muttered as he brandished his wand, making the smoking substance on his face disappear. George did the same.

“Right,” George said after he vanished the melting cauldron with a wave of his wand. “Instant Darkness Powder, is it?”

“Yes, Mr. Weasley. Although I am not entirely sure you should be the one to…” Verity eyed Fred and George’s singed hair warily.

“Don’t worry about it,” Fred ran his fingers through his hair absentmindedly, “It fits with the theme.”

“That’s right,” George grinned at the young witch, “Happy April Fool’s, Verity.” he winked.

Merlin’s beard, it was April Fool’s! She had forgotten! And that wink… Oh no, that couldn’t be good.

Verity’s looked down at herself. Her robe looked the same. Her hands and arms looked the same. Her legs and feet looked the same. She took off her robe and examined the back. It was perfectly intact. What could be wrong?

Wait…

Verity ran as fast as she could to the nearest mirror. Along the way, she could hear snickers from the customers as they looked at her. Uh oh. This was bad.

The mirror confirmed that fact mercilessly. Her eyes widened in terror as she saw what had been done to her neck and her face. The skin there had been turned into this weird mixture of light yellow and white, so it looked like it was made of smashed eggs. Just because she said she liked eggs that one time more than a week ago.

But what truly made her mad was what had been done to her hair. It should be noted that her short, spiky, light blonde hair was her proudest physical feature. It was her trademark. It made her stand out. Now, it was sloppy and stuck to her scalp with no intention of spiking up again anytime soon, and it was dyed a shade of green that looked like, of all things, spinach. Yes, it still made her stand out, but she thought she would rather not at the moment.

Verity stood still for a long while in front of the mirror with her mouth hanging open. Then she resolutely turned around and screamed.

Meanwhile, the culprits were directing their trademark grins at a girl standing before them.

“Was it you who asked for Instant Darkness Powder?” Fred asked.

“Yes,” the girl averted her eyes and smiled nervously.

“Very good choice if you are in need of a quick getaway,” George said in an approving tone, “Over here.”

“Hey, you look the right age to be in school,” Fred looked her over, “We are most honored that you would skip…”

“No no no, I didn’t skip school,” the girl sighed, “this is going to be awkward, but… just pretend I’m a squib, okay? I mean, it’s a fine role to play. I am familiar with the wizarding world, but I cannot cast magic. You know what, I’m a squib. There.”

“Oh, well,” Fred scratched his head awkwardly, “Still, you can have some fun, right?”

“You’re in luck. This place is full of fun stuff. Oh, we’re here,” George said, taking an evil-looking package from a shelf and handing it to the girl. She handed him a few coins in return.

“Thanks,” she said, holding the package close. She looked up for a split second before directing her eyes at the ground again. If she had the physical ability to blush, she would have. Instead, she just muttered, “Happy birthday, Mr. Weasley and Mr. Weasley.” Then she fled from the shop, but not before casting a pained glance at the twins. It was meant to be directed towards Fred, but since she honestly couldn’t tell them apart, it was directed at both of them instead.

After she was gone, George turned to look at Fred.

“Well, that was strange,” he remarked, “How did she know it’s our birthday?”

Fred shrugged. “I had almost forgotten myself. But since she so kindly reminded us, we should hold a celebration, shouldn’t we, Forge?”

“That is a magnificent idea, Gred. But first, let’s check on Verity,”

The word “Verity” was barely heard over the long scream from the approximate position of the mirror.

“Yes, let’s check on Verity.”

~ ~ ~

I told you something bad would happen. And it did.

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