My work really sucks out my ability to English sometimes. (No, really, I've been watching Gravity Falls in Japanese.)

From what I've read so far, I'm really enjoying Moira's time in the RC and a good look at life in HQ from an agent's spouse/family. It's not something I've read very much about but I do commiserate with the frequent eating of ramen, haha. I'll ask on Discord about some timeline-related stuff when I finish reading.

Happy (belated) Re-Boardiversary! Have some more lemming repellent.

Have some rose-colored glasses! Happy Boardiversary again!

I like Moira’s style of narration! She seems like such a sweet character (which hopefully will last; I haven’t read about a lot of sweet characters in the PPC!). Aw, what, no throwing the newbie into a super tough badfic for their first mission XD? Poor Moira though, she’s trying so hard to be kind to Blank and the Sue. And wow, that is a terrible Sue.

• The beginning, including what Moria's up to and the bits about doughnuts and instant noodles, are very nice setup!
• I wonder if Moira does actually need to talk to someone. (Update: she probably does)
• Autumn has a point about Blank not needing to go alone.
• Mellon is a cute crow.
• I like Blank and Autumn's relationship.
• Poor Mellon, having to stay behind.
• Apostrophe catastrophe. Heh.
• Neat description of Snape's flickering face.
• "Not Rose" ... you have a point
• Moira is right - there could be an interesting premise there
• I like what a story being abandoned for a long time does to the world
• ... and the bit with Monky
• The unformatted chapter is an oof
• The scene with the orc line is an understandable reaction we don't see too often
• And I liked the attempt to help and the kill scene
• ... I was not expecting Buddy to be a thing

Overall, this was a really nice take on a PPC mission with some neat stuff I haven't seen before (that I can remember)! I enjoyed reading

• Tomash

Oooooh, I really like the opening scenes here! All those books open and bookmarked really shows all the studying that's been going on, and is a much more dynamic image than just saying the RC has books on the shelves. And the details about what food is easier to prepare between missions, and Autumn both caring for and admonishing Blank after her mission, are such a down-to-earth and domestic look at PPC life that I'm just not used to seeing . . . I really like it! It's so much deeper than the usual "agents are hanging out/sleeping and then a mission happens" that I'm used to! (Food is especially tricky for me to think of in any interactive way like that, because I don't really enjoy eating in RL, and I tend to stick with stuff that heats quickly with little prep time so i can spend more time on fiction and getting ready for work . . . actually, that feels pretty RC life, now that I type it out!)

I love that Moira shows her background as a fic character by sort of trying to fantasy football her way through the mission, trying to edit it into something better as she goes, Nando v. Movies-style. It makes for a great contrast with Blank's more straightforward work ethic, which makes sense for her, since Sparklee never let her enter a story. And best of all, neither approach will be 100% right all the time, even though Blank had the correct diagnosis on this particular story. Speaking of which, your dialogue for Amalthea early on, where she seems to just be making vapid observations, was hilarious, and really had me going along with Moira's desire to avoid assassinating Althea. Once you actually let Althea go full Suvian, she became absolutely terrifying, made even worse by establishing her empty, thoughtless voice tone from earlier. It's interesting that Moira sensed how deeply wrong the world was on multiple occasions, but because of her imagined solidarity with Althea, she ignored her own instincts, only to immediately be turned against the second Althea learned her name and was able to weave it into the narration. As Autumn said, "a perfect teaching moment" indeed!

So, uh, Buddy?!!? What a shock! I love the description of his human body, with all the attributes of crow skin and feathers still recognizable in the new form . . . but like, what? Did he fly into a reality room and win the lottery to go more human than crow? Or was he something like Beorn all along, with a crow form rather than bear? (Feel free to ignore if you're answering these in a later story; I just like to speculate!)

And a couple minor things I liked: I love the C-Cad scanning the canon itself and giving a phone app-style forecast. And you found the perfect mini, and you wrote her perfectly. That is all.

—doctorlit thinks the "unicorn fiasco" is that Quirrell-Voldemort goes into the Forbidden Forest to drink that unicorn blood, but the unicorns are like, "Yo, most of the magic is sucked out of the universe for some reason, we don't have to take this crap from these dark wizards." So they all go marching through the forest singing a beautiful, acapella rendition of Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It" until they find Quirrell-Voldemort, and they just shank them. Shank them with all their horns. And then later the Hogwarts staff get the body to the hospital wing, and Madame Pomfrey is just like, "This is a weird tumor, on the back of Quirrell's head. Guys? Guys, come look at this exceedingly weird tumor. Is that not just the weirdest tumor you've ever seen?" And the scar doesn't pain Harry for blah blah years, all is well, etc.

I loved the opening - I actually read it aloud to Kaitlyn - and everything with Autumn was adorable. I totally feel for Moira in her desire to say that it could be decent, done properly - Agent Kaitlyn would agree! (But equally, I enjoy the payoff in the finale - very well played.)

I also really enjoy the point you (/Blank) made about Bellatrix's knife and Gryffindor's Sword. I don't think I've seen a mission make a plot point out of the limited nature of canon resources before; it's nice, interesting.

And thanks for the hat-tip at the top! I don't actually remember translating the names, but the style screams 2020s-Huinesoron, so I believe it. ^_^

I'm so glad you came back. :) Happy ReBoardiversary, and a jolly merry birthday!

hS

This was a fun read. I like your characters, especially Moira, and how she thinks about being an ex-Sue. I especially like the part where she narrowly escapes being discovered while she's in the house-elf disguise.

I really, really love Moira and Blank's interactions, and I'm seconding Linstar's thoughts on the 'trying-to-recruit-the-Sue thing.' Awesome mission!

Wow. Just wow.

I really, really, love Moira. She’s the best, very awkward and endearing. I like the trying-to-recruit-the-Sue thing (I want to do a similar thing with one of my Agents) and that helped me see how such a thing could go wrong. Amalthea’s not a fun Sue.

I liked Blank’s grumpiness.

And, um...I can’t think of anything to provide concrit on. Really good job!

-Ls, who is mentally adding Moira to his list of favorite Agents.

I read a little bit of the new mission so far and my only thought is, "Wait, I was supposed to do an easy mission with newbies?!"

-kA, who likes the mission so far, but has a head cold and can't think the clearest atm.