Subject: Oh, I'll try that. Thanks! (nm)
Author:
Posted on: 2022-06-23 23:33:44 UTC
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New mission + Interlude! by
on 2022-06-21 22:51:20 UTC
Edited
Writing
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Here's Mission Five, an on-and-off project I've had lying around for over a year. Featuring Excessive Capitalization, figures of speech taken far too literally, and the first mini I've recorded in two years. The canon is Disney's Frozen.
And here's a short interlude (as in, two pages and a singular joke) that took a lot less time to write. It's about milk.
Hope you enjoy!
(edit: links have been changed to their published versions)
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re: mission and interlude by
on 2022-07-02 12:48:07 UTC
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You know, I really, really like Charlie. They're just so very mellow, it almost makes the badfic weirdness more relaxing for me as I read. On another character, Charlie's nonchalance and lack of regard for Jiwon's discomfort, might come off as indifference, or even mockery, but with Charlie, it's so obvious that they really are innocently unperturbed by most of what happens around them, that it just comes off as wholesome. It helps that they always become supportive and caring towards Jiwon once he really starts getting overwhelmed. They make a great partnership!
You had some great badfic imagery in this mission. The big stand-outs were the moments when the canon characters were kind of flopping around in weird positions while trying to act out the scenes. It gave me a strong "Team Fortress mod crappost video" vibe, which looked especially weird, imagining it happen in a Disney CGI setting. The scene where Anna and Elsa were eating at a table with all the other characters standing silently around them like a collection of character models was quite creepy and weird to picture, as well. I also liked the extremely tall library (All that paper wasted on giant books with blank pages? Shameful!), and laughed out loud at the oil-and-chocolate wedding cake just sort of collapsing on itself on the table. It's a well done mission!
I suspect there's a joke I'm missing in the interlude (I have no idea how coffee is made), but I still enjoyed Charlie continuing to be wholesome!
One typo:
"'Got them in position?' Charlie asked, flipping opening the chargelist."
Either "flipping open" or just "opening," I reckon.
(I would also argue that "charge list" ought to be two separate words, but it can be a stylistic thing too, if you like it they way you have it.)—doctorlit, taking a break from PPC+20 to read actual contemporary missions
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Thanks for the review! by
on 2022-07-03 18:19:45 UTC
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I'll get to fixing the typo once I get the chance to. And I'm really glad you enjoyed Charlie in this mission!
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Good mission! (I haven't read the interlude yet) by
on 2022-06-27 21:44:33 UTC
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- I like the overall effects the words have on the word world, such as the capitals in every word making things very tall, and the canons acting like glitchy 3D models in a badly animated gmod video.
- I also like how the lack of description in some places, like the mess in the kitchen, made for an exaggerated scene.
- The scene where the characters in the fic turned into Olaf was appropriately creepy.
- "shredding tears", just makes me laugh!
- The exorcism was anticlimactic and I love it!
Overall, it's awesome!
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I read the interlude! by
on 2022-06-28 11:39:10 UTC
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It's pretty silly and fun!
What Charlie was doing to prepare the latte is a mystery...
--Ozzielot
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Glad you liked them! (nm) by
on 2022-06-28 13:28:31 UTC
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Oh yes, this. by
on 2022-06-24 23:56:55 UTC
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I’ll keep Els nice and
warmcold.—Ls
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Thoughts by
on 2022-06-24 03:39:08 UTC
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- The fast beginning works here, it seems like
- I like the effect of the capital letters
- It's neat that the mission starts by noting things aren't that bad
- Also, 'ice lord' :)
- I didn't quite follow why both agents had moments where they spaced out before the charge scene
- Over-capitalism is a fantastic charge even if it's not what was meant
- The thing with the imploding was a nice bit of contrast
- Re interlude: That was a nice little funny thing
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Sorry for the late reply, but thanks! (nm) by
on 2022-06-28 13:26:17 UTC
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Also, question about wiki links. by
on 2022-06-23 23:08:14 UTC
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I tried doing the 'publish to web' option on Google Docs and updating the links on the wiki, but none of them work now? Like, every single publish link gives a 'Sorry, unable to open the file at this time' message. Does anyone know how to fix it?
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Ah, I've spotted the problem. by
on 2022-06-23 23:24:48 UTC
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You've got periods at the end of your URLs. Those should not be there and will need to be removed.
When I just copy and paste the new links without the periods, they work fine. {= )
~Neshomeh
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Oh, I'll try that. Thanks! (nm) by
on 2022-06-23 23:33:44 UTC
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I enjoyed both of these! by
on 2022-06-21 23:55:47 UTC
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Jiwon and Charlie are such a cool team. Literally. They don't really do the outright bickering with one another thing that a lot of other agent partners do; they sorta just vibe together. It gives the feeling that they're veteran agents who aren't very fazed by this badfic at all, but still react to it in funny ways.
The fic itself reminds me of The Room, though that might be because of the line "Oh Hey Olaf".
"I did not freeze her! It's not true! It's bull s***! I did not freeze her! I did naaaaht. Oh hai, Olaf!"And also, it's about the same level of riveting slice-of-life as The Room, so there's that.
The interlude was short, but sweet! The pacing of the joke was excellent, so that last punchline made me laugh. Great job!
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Oh, thanks! by
on 2022-06-22 20:02:44 UTC
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Honestly, I've been worrying more about my actual character-writing recently, so it's nice to hear you enjoy them! And I'm glad you liked the interlude as well!