Subject: It's brave of you to come forward. Thanks.
Author:
Posted on: 2022-10-02 22:22:30 UTC

Seeing as you're an actual known member, I believe you had good intentions, and like I said above, I do agree that Linstar had a right to know the exact details of what was going on. Having seen the conversation myself, though, I thought in this instance that the issue(s) could best be resolved by getting the involved parties talking to each other rather than for people to continue talking around each other.

I confess I don't understand worrying about people talking behind my back—it's just not something I can personally be bothered to spend precious energy on—but it certainly isn't something we want to tolerate in our community.

In general, I think the best way to handle it if you see people gossiping about someone else is just to tell them to stop. If there's something they need to discuss with the subject of the gossip, you can encourage them to do that, and even offer to mediate if you feel up for it. If they're just being nasty, that should definitely be raised with the mods—but I hasten to add I haven't seen anything really nasty take place. Most of what I've seen is socially anxious teenagers and young adults being bad at expressing negative feelings constructively. It takes practice. {= )

It's always okay to hold off on taking any action until you're in a good headspace.

Cheers,

~Neshomeh

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