Subject: Re: Interlude
Author:
Posted on: 2012-05-04 15:07:00 UTC

Once again, excellent work with Xericka's lack-of-emotions. I like that she's still able to show concern for her partner, and move out of her comfort zone in order to make Gremlin feel better, while still remaining a believable Nobody (and, I think, acting much like a true Organization XIII member in that regard).

I loved the line, "Mother or not, I will slap you so hard that Tetsuya Nomura will feel it."

Also, I would love to read that non-human edition of the adoptive handbook. I imagine it's very unintentionally funny for humans to read (especially if the author is actually the Marquis, though probably not).

Errors!
"For all your foibles, you are a relative center of stability and reliability in the middle of a unpredictable badfic tempest."
"a" should be "an"

"Gremlin was only able to managed a few noncommittal syllables."
"managed" should be "manage"

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