Subject: Run-on sentences.
Author:
Posted on: 2013-06-02 14:55:00 UTC
I have found an Angel Beats fic composed ENTIRELY of them.
(WARNING: It's rated M, I should probably let you know that.)
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9317940/1/Angel-Beats-Kanades-Allies
Each paragraph seems to consist of just one incredibly long sentence. And he's kept it going for 12 chapters and 24k words. ._.
It's 20,000 words but only one chapter. Suspicious already, and then you discover that he put ther whole story - which is multiple chapters - into a single chapter.
And he still had the gall to MARK each chapter.
Half of it is bad grammar and bad plot, a fourth of it is a villain Stu with a really dumb name, and the other fourth is run-on sentences.
I've been running an MST of it for a while now, since there's plenty to say of it.
The story summary... How can a story be both canon AND non-canon?
It's painful to read. The run-on sentences do not seem to be intentional, because even the Author's Notes seem to have them.
Imagine a person trying to narrate that. Even with the pauses in between due to the commas, they will still run out of breath quickly.