Subject: Uh oh... its the Horrible Eragon Swordsmanship Rant!
Author:
Posted on: 2011-12-19 16:52:00 UTC
He somehow became better than Brom in the course of weeks fighting with sticks. I would like you to somehow become better than an actual sword fighting master in a few weeks, using sticks that aren't even analogous to how one would use a sword at all and claim that makes you actually good. Nowhere did I see him ever do drills, learn footwork, study technique... This is like saying he improves by LARPing for a few weeks against somebody with greater skill. It doesn't work that way.
And then he switched to actual swords. He sparred against his mentor with the actual weapon he would use to kill people like it was no big deal. Sure, Brom shielded the edge with magic, but he was still flailing around a heavy metal bar that 1) he is totally untrained in the use of, sticks discounted, 2) he does not know the weight of, or his own strength. He by all rights could break bones and seriously hurt a person. And his instructor is a so-called swordfighting expert? What kind of teacher would have completely NO knowledge about basic safety, or even that maybe Eragon should learn how to not hurt himself before he pretends his LARPing skills can serve him in an actual fight with dangerous steel weapons, sharp or otherwise?
My family reads buzz-books on principle, and is a fan of fantasy in general. So we all picked up a copy of Eragon and passed it down the line. My father, a blackbelt in aikido and quite proficient with the sword, threw down the book in disgust, absolutely mad that this kid had the gall to think he was good at any kind of martial art, when he'd practiced for only a few weeks, utterly disregarded safety, his mentor acted with total lack of knowledge, and somehow was superhuman enough to become good enough to BEST that skilled mentor with only a few weeks of effort that shouldn't have taught him anything in the first place.
I'm sorry. Eragon is bad. The way he treats learning new skills, the total lack of research, the sheer disregard and disrespect of those who actually had to spend time and effort developing said skills... he's bad. He's a Gary Stu, through and through. He is like the manifestation of all dweeby people flailing around their sticks and LARP swords and wishing that they could be MASTER SWORDSMEN!!!11one! with just a few weeks of 'practice,' and don't need discipline or applied study because they're special and amazing.
(No insult to LARPers. I am one, in fact, but the dweebs have seen... for every person who tries to study footwork and technique and improve, there is a guy who thinks flailing around like Star Wars Kid makes him a combat master)
I am sorry. I have read the books, but I'm so sorry. Eragon is terrible. I can really only see it as maybe somebody's guilty pleasure. It's just so totally entitled, disrespectful, and uninformed. Argh blargh blah.