Subject: One of the marks of a good mission...
Author:
Posted on: 2011-09-18 11:22:00 UTC
...is that is can be both entertaining and enthralling to people who are unfamiliar with the canon involved. You've nailed that here. I know next to nothing about both Avatar and Nausicaä, but I still thoroughly enjoyed this mission. Your character interaction in particular was very good. Florestan and Eusabius have an excellent rapport, and throwing Zerenze into the mix was a nice choice.
My one issue is regarding how large the quotes from the original badfic can get. There are points, particularly closer to the end, where the sheer length of the excerpts was dragging down the pacing of the mission. Really long excerpts always smack a bit of 'telling' rather than 'showing.' I would suggest that you try to describe what is happening in the badfic rather than just resorting straight to direct quotes.
Looking forward to your next mission!