1. Misadventures in Middle Earth
   Summary: My OC end up in the Lotr world. I suck at summary's so if a sarcastic twit ending up in the Lotr world and bringing chaos wherever he goes *And quite a few scratches* Is your cup of tea then by all means enjoy. Otherwise you can read somethin
   
   
   Krisp didn't quite understand what happened. One moment he was chatting with South and Whatev, and the next, he was there. He didn't know where, apart from the fact it looked like a fantasy world. South would have told him which one, but he wasn't there. Well, Krisp would have to find out by himself.
   He was currently into some woods, with, well, random trees and other various plants he couldn't tell which they were because he wasn't a botany geek. Well, in any case he would have been screwed. Nobody in the Infernal Trio was a botany geek.
   Krisp walked a bit around and stumbled on some underground city, full of funky people with pointed ears. Vulcans, maybe. OK, so they were Vulcans. He would teach them how to have fun. It was clever of him to keep the lighter and the aerosol bomb.
   Krisp wandered around until he found a place full of people. He then lit his lighter and sprayed the aerosol bomb on it. He shouted 'SURPRISE, HAHAHAHAHA' and ran toward the crowd. The Vulcans were a little bit more emotional than expected, but they managed quite well to evacuate. Krisp chased them in the corridors, almost burned himself on several occasions and still managed to make some people panic.
   Then he ended up in a small gray room, where two other guys were shouting at him.
   "Krisp, will you stop this? Oh my glod, you went flamethrower-crazy!"
   "Where have you been?"
   "Oh, sorry, guys, I just arrived... I was in some funky place full of weird Vulcans, I was having a little fun, and I didn't realize I was back here..."
   "And you got FLAMETHROWER-CRAZY on the people there??? You have strange ways of filling your time, Krisp."

I have to add a disclaimer to this, I do not own LotR nor to I own Bold Font, though she is a good friend. Sorry for any and all spelling mistakes, I have no spell check right now.



Leto and Milask were sitting in the PPC General Store during a very odd quiet time. The minis were stocking the shelves with latest barterings from the agents, one notable thing to come in recently was a box from the Who verse. No not a Tardis, but it relied on many of the same principles.

Milask is humanoid cat standing about 150cm (5 feet), was lounging in the back room when his fur stood on end. "What is happening out there Leto?"

Leto, a young (dare I say it) man called back, "what do you mean?"

"I am getting this creapy fealing that something has come up that needs emergency repair," Milask yelled back. "Just when I was about to nod off, too."

"What ever it is, we will just send it to HQ. They owe us enough..." Leto finished with a mutter.

Milask tried to go back to that semi vegitative state that he loves to assume when he got the chance. It wasn`t often, specially when his best friend`s wife was a dragon. Literally. She could transform into any form and size that she wanted, due to the ability to share L-space. Currently she was in her lab trying to make some new concotions to sell. Her form was that of a 14 year old Japanese girl. Milask would call her jail bait if he wasn`t affraid of getting his head bitten off figuatively by Leto and litterally by the dragon herself. Life is interesting, not necessarily safe.

Milask couldn`t get to sleep, the pressure to his sixth sence was starting to get uncomfortable. Like when someone scratching in one place constantly for about an hour.

"Are you sure nothing is happening out there?" Milask yelled out to Leto. There was no reply. "What? You trying to be funny now?" Milask jumped to his feet and went to the door that lead to the store proper. Something was telling him that he was not going to like what he would see on the other side.

Instead of yanking the door open like he was origionally planning he cautiously opened the door a small amount. Only to have the door punch him in the gut when Smeagul, the mini-balrog, pushed it forcefully from the other side. Smeagul was not happy. Now Milask`s curriosity was truly stilled. There is truth in the maxim `curriosity killed the cat` and Milask had already lost a couple. It was times like this where he didn`t know if he is glade or not about the minis ablity to speak. All he knew was the Smeagul what mad.

"Calm down, I`m sure that we can fix what ever is out there. Is Leto still out there?" When Smeagul shook his head, Milask knew he was in for Interesting Times.

"Don`t worry, I am sure that we can get your toy back," Leto hated when Milask refered to him as Smeagul`s plaything. But being a cat, Milask didn`t care.

Going back to the door, Milask opened it fully. Smeagul got out, so there couldn`t be anything dangerous in the immidiate vacinity.　What he saw was the black box in the middle of the floor, crap.

Taking his time, Milask went to the shelves and graped a portal generator, a couple of disguse kits and a emergency kit. The only place where he would blend in would be the Rifts continuum and the later age of Dr Who. Not a very broad range.

Then he touched the box.

****************

Milask woke up in a place that could only be described as downtown Brooklyn. Leto was beside him in his shop clothes.

"`Bout time you got here," Leto said to him. "Unfortunatly, the portal generator doesn`t work and for once it isn`t because you landed on it and brock it."

It is common knowledge that no matter where you packed the generator. Be it in its own hard case or in the middle of a backpack, you will fall on it and it will break. Depending on how you packed it, that call be a very painful fall. The experienced agent will just carry it in his or her back pocket and have repair tools as part of his kit.

"I don`t think that this is a regular mission," Leto commented. "I mean, this world is fully formed and real. I almost got hit by a taxi after waking up. Wonder what is happening."

"Well we better find out fast, this disguse itches," Milask complained. Never mind that the disguses only bent light, Milask said that he could feal it.

Leto rolled his eyes at him and started looking around. Some music was comming from an open window. "Wonder what that is..." Milask started walking over to the window.

Inside was a girl sitting at a computer with the lable IGNIS in bold letters across the top of the moniter and a LotR game playing. "Daddy Sauron, can you get me some water please, I am at a difficult part of the war and I am thirsty!"

"Okay, that was strange.." Suddenly a tugging fealing at their navel caught them both and the scene went blank, they both passed out.

******************

The woke to find themselves in a desert. Now being of the variety of being that is covered in fur and dark fur at that, the sun was uncomfortable.

"Hey, aren`t those the Blue Mountains over there," Leto said pointing. "What are we doing in ME?"

"Don`t know, but what is with this desert?" Milask replied, "I thought this area was forests."

"That would put up in Elven territory then, we better change our disguses then," Leto muttered. He fiddled on the dial on Milask`s and his own disgise generator changed them to elf.

At this point a group of young women crested a dune not that far away. Their bickering started to get heated (pun intended). One was crying and one was rolling her eyes at everything. "And where are you precious elves." Was heard by the two men.

At that point, one of the girls saw them. The squwee must have been heard by the dogs in the southern deserts.

"HOT ELVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Leto never saw this in his life, but this girl was now in the middle of a flying glomp, and Milask was the target.

Milask side stepped yelled back, "Yes, I am a hot elf. The heat is killing me." To the girl that was now rolling down rest of the dune. "Are you responsible...." The tugging sensation came again and the two men passed out again.

**********************


When the revied again Leto started to get the fealing that he has done this before, but couldn`t remember where, or how he got out of it.

This time they found themselves in more of a Rohan type area. "Guess we will have to go back to human."

"Could you say that with a little less disgust, I am human you know," Leto said.

"You aren`t the one who has to make sure that your tail doesn`t exit the field," Milask shot back.

Suddenly, Jane, Leto`s wife, popped into exsistance. She didn`t look happy.

"What. Am. I. Doing. Here?" she accused the men.

"Love, I have no idea. We just found ourselves here ourselves." Leto said. "We just start to figure out what is going on, then we find ourselves somewhere else."

"Oh crap. We are in a Fill-the-Plothole." Jane said, she only looked fourteen currently, if you found out her true age, she would have to kill you. Not even Leto knew how old his wife was. But he did hear a funny story about Rome in its hayday that sounded...

The fealing clicked in Leto. "Great, we have have to get through these, then we can leave. that is why the portal generator isn`t working."

"You two maybe, but as soon as this scene is finished, I am out of here. Someone has to look after the hatchlings while you are here," Jane said. "Oh, and don`t waste time. You know how the minis get when you leave them alone for too long." Jane said with an evil grin.

From out of nowhere a battle started.

"Did you bring any weapons?" Leto asked Milask.

"No," came the rueful replie. "I thought that we could portal right out of here as soon as I found you."

"Then, RUN."

The three of them took off in different directions, soon they lost eachother. Que tugging sensation.

**********************

Milask and Leto awoke to find themselves in a chaotic area. The land was not keeping still. Now that the boys figued out what was happening, they just let it go on.

Soon they cam uppon a man that was spewing a strange aura.

"I thought that Bold Font kept him locked away in her sub conciousness." Leto said. "Nothing good can come of this..."

Thankfully that was when the tugging sensation came.

***********************

They woke to find themselves in a wilderland, and it was wilderous.

"What is that?" Milask asked. It looked like there was an elf floating by. "Wait, I thought that we were in ME. There is no flying elves in ME."

"Well, only if they are being flown somewhere by eagles," Leto replied. "Those things are huge."

A huge pressure come over the whole area, it felt like the pressure of logic. Just when it seamed as if there eyes where about to pop out, and eagle can into existance under the elf and they flew away.

"Guess that solves that..."

TUG *********************

They were woken by music. Leto`s musical education was not that good, but he knew a bad chord when he heard one. And this song had one.

"Hey, isn`t this Mirkwood?" Milask asked.

"You know, I think you are right," Leto replied.

After wandering around for a bit, something shifted in Milask`s vision and building poped into view. "Wowww, I think that we beter get out of here."

Milask lead them to along a path that seemed to leave to area. Luckly they were still in elven disgises. Soon they came uppon an whining sound. Since that seemed to be the only thing happening, Milask followed it and found a fighting erik.

There was what looked like a crying elf in the sand and one holding a practice sword standing nearby talking to another elf.

"I only got one strike to the head in and then he started crying like he did when he first came her as a child. I have no idea what went wrong." The one with the sword said.

"Give him another strick to the head, that may fix it," said the other elf. "I have seen this once before a couple of hundred years ago, that was what fixed it for me."

The man approached the black haired elf gave him a good thawk to the head. After the one on the ground came to himself again, 20 minutes later. "Oww, my splitting head. What happened?"

"I got a lucky strick in my lord, your lord father came at once when you passed out," said the elf holding the sword. "How are you fealing now, other than the headacke?"

"Like I just want to put my childhood behind me, I don`t know why..." Legolas said.

Tug ********************

They woke to find themselves sitting in the back of a classroom while the class was in full swing.

"What the hell," Milask muttered.

The teacher in the front of the room was looking at the black board with a `oblivious gavze`.

"What are we doing here?" Leto asked.

There was a scratching of a pencil near by when where was no one else writing. They were busy trying to figure out what a `gavze` and if it will be on the next test.

Finally, Milask could not stand it anymore and stood up and walked over the writting student. "Hey Leto," Milask called out. "I think we have out culprit right here."

Milask pulled the pencil out of the student`s fingures and the tugging sensation came back.

***************************

When they woke, they found themselves at a zoo. This was not an orginary zoo, it was a zoo in Middle Earth. They knew this because they were looking at two great big oliphants.

Above the cage were the signs Erestor and Glorfindel. Now normally when you have two males of any spcies together they will drive the other one off. That didn`t seem to be the case here.

"What is happening here," Milask asked. "Wait, they aren`t going to... No, NOOOOOO."

At this point the tugging sensation came and not a moment too soon.

***********************

"Well I hope you have had your fun boys." Jane said when they came too. "The hatchlings need to be fed. There is a cow to be quartered in the back, just give them a chunk of that. I have to go to HQ and get that box dealt with."

"Love you too, dear," Leto replied and went to find his children. "Man, I have a headacke. And don`t you dare say anything, anything at all..."

Milask just laughed and went back to the staff room.







Hope you liked that! I tried to add logic to all the stories. Leto

hS, are you on giggle juice at the moment? You seem incredibly determined to make people laugh just now.

1. The Best Maths Class EVER!
   This was actually written during Maths under the oblivious gavze of our wonderful Teacher. We hope you like it.
   
   Jen and Cassie did their best to stifle a giggle as they swapped the piece of paper between desks. It was Maths Class, but through a (in their eyes) wacky trail of 'coincidences' involving a certain movie, teenage hormones, teenage boredom and general teenage silliness, it was quickly developing into something else entirely.
   
   The best part was probably that they looked completely innocent doing it. Writing on a piece of paper in the middle of a class of people writing on pieces of paper? Completely innocent, clearly! The Teacher even smiled at them as it did it's cursory gavze of the classroom. They smiled back, careful to keep what they were actually doing well hidden beneath the textbook. Jen had forgotten hers, leaving her to share with Cassie and leading to their current enterprise. The Teacher trundled past to lock on to a pair of boys in the back spending their time in a more obviously unproductive way.
   
   Cassie had scribbled something in the margin. "goin 2 put this on ff?"
   Jen grinned. "yep!! XD"
   "awesome!"
   "this is the best story eva!"
   "lol XD!"
   Jen sniggered and reviewed what they'd written so far, ignoring the whirring and screaming as the Teacher converted to Combat Mode against the boys at the back. It had Leggy and Aragorn in, who wouldn't love it?
   The two girls looked at each other and grinned. This was the best Maths Class EVER!

5.) A Tale From the Wilderland.

"Legolas! Stop poring over those moldy old tomes and go hunting with me. It's Spring!"

"Yes, ada. I'm just reading the last lines of the Narn before I go."

"Well, hurry up! The others are all expecting some venison along with Dorwinion wine tonight!"

"Very well." Legolas finished quickly, and begean putting on his hunting gear. Once he finished, he went to the stables, where his horse was waiting for him. Then, he joined his father and the rest of the hunting party just outside the gate.

--Several Hours later--

"It was a good hunt, wasn't it?"

"Yes, Legolas. I quite liked the way you brought down a wild boar from fifty paces. You've improved."

"Only because I had a great teac-"

Suddenly, a scream came from a stand of woods up ahead. The hunting pary rode the scene, and found an elven warrior, who had a deep gash on his side.

"What happened?"

"My Lord, A party of orcs has crossed over the border and is attacking a nearby village! Please, come quckly!"

Is that enough for a first try?

3. friendship over no bounds
three friends end up in middle earth seperated and have to fight in the war for the rings disclaimer i do not own anything from the tolkiverse

Max blinked and looked around. He'd just been smoking pot down behind the changing rooms on the park with his best mates, and now he was in this whole other place. There were men in armour rushing all over the place, and people were yelling in a strange language and everyone was carrying absolutely lethal looking swords.

Determined to find out what was going on, Max went up to one of the men yelling orders. Before he could say anything the man turned and glared at Max, before grabbing his arm and dragging him towards one of the buildings that men were coming from.

Half an hour later, Max was wearing the same armour as everyone else, with a white tree emblazoned on his chest and a sword at his side that he had no idea how to use.

--

Tim sat uncomfortably on the horse he'd been given, shifting slightly to try and ease muscles sore from several days of riding. It'd been years since he was last on a horse, but he still remembered some of the basics, which was all to the good since he didn't think any of the men surrounding him were about to give lessons to a beginner. Not that he would understand them at any rate, since none of the bastards seemed to speak English. He'd been conscripted into an army whose language he didn't speak and whose weapons he couldn't use, to fight a war that he didn't even know the meaning of.

'If I was gonna slip through the Rift or whatever, why couldn't I have ended up in the Napoleonic era or later. Somewhere with guns,' he thought, 'not swords and spears and shit that doesn't even make a decent noise when you use it.'

A horn sounded and the column of horses unfolded into a line. Tim found himself near one of the ends, but not so near that he could slip away unnoticed. He knew what would come next now that a line had been formed, and for all his bravado normally, he didn't want to kill a man for a reason that he wasn't sure of. He didn't think that the other side would give him a choice though.

--

Stuck in the middle of a marching column of armed men, James felt like he was going to die. When he'd been found by the side of the road, alone and dazed, he'd been given a sword and shoved into the column. Everywhere he looked the men were as dark-skinned, or darker, than he was. There wasn't a white person in sight, and James was starting to get the bad feeling that white people would be the enemy.

Ahead, lying limp in the still air, he could see a red flag with a black serpent on it, all the way at the front of the soldiers. It was heavily guarded, the spear points of the men around it gleaming in the sun, and James quickly decided to stay away from anything that required that much protection. Between that and the monster elephants at the very back, James reckoned he'd be lucky to survive his 'own side', let alone the enemy.

Never played it before, but I did read some of the past ones. *grins* Now I just need to pick...

And hS.... *bursts out laughing* "Not even"! Not even"! *giggles*

Oh, I am in a silly mood today. :D