Subject: groan
Author:
Posted on: 2009-01-31 22:35:00 UTC
Naomi goraned, "He's my partner. And..." she gasped as she noticed something... "WHERES THE DORKS!!!!!!"
she quickly snapped at the others, "Please, no killing him until we can sort this out, okay?"
"I gave it to some agent, don;t know who. some funny male."
You can thank Laburnum for inspiring this thread and hS for its title. Let's do some genderbending. *eg* To start, here are my main three agents as the opposite sex, as done with the TekTek Dream Avatar thing.
Jenni:
Ilraen:
Nume:
I think Ilraen and Jenni are having the most fun. Jenni has been genderbent before, so she had a much easier time adjusting. {= ) Nume is just how Nume is.
~Neshomeh
In case anyone's wondering why Agents Trojie and Pads have been curiously absent from the genderbending fiasco, fear not. It's because we have Plans.
With a capital P. Mwahahaha.
...if you don't have Permission yet, but do have Agent characters thought out, can you still do this? I like insanity.
On-Board events like this are usually considered open to everyone, regardless of Permission status. {= )
~Neshomeh
"What did you press?" Risa muttered, knowing that his partner wasn't exactly listening to him at that time. "I told you to stay away from the console after last time."
"Didn't press nothing," Ansela grinned and stretched, ignoring the ripping sound as his clothes finally gave up on conforming to his new, larger body shape.
"You must have pressed something. People do not just change gender on a whim."
"Sure they do. I know this guy back in my home continuum who can change your gender if you give him enough money. Hell, sometimes he changes his own gender for shits and giggles."
"I take it you have availed yourself of his services in the past," Risa sighed as Ansela nodded eagerly, rubbing at his forehead to try and stave off the impending migraine. "And this would be why you are so unperturbed by this turn of events."
"Yup. I'm going to the cafeteria, see if there's anyone who knows what's going on," Ansela opened the door and grinned at Risa. "Want me to get you anything?"
"I would appreciate it if you would find some clothing that does not look like it will fall off as soon as you do so much as breath deeply."
Ansela nodded. "Will do."
Fun times~
I know. I don't use TekTek. I'm so nonconformist. =P
Samuel, who is not too pleased and may or may not have raided the Armory;
and Kat, who seriously could care less, only the lack of cramps might be nice.
Because I really prefer the look of the human avatars from Subeta.net -- virtual pet site. Neo for 13+ with pretty arts. =)
http://subetahq.com/wardrobe/
I use that generator for most of my generating needs.
The Subeta thing has no HTML code thing.
right click on the pic to get the image location.
[img src="paste image location"]
replace the [] with
I've noticed SHQ has a bad habit of screwing up the bases when you use the code directly from the image, else that'd be perfect.
But if you click and drag to the desktop, upload to tinypic, and then delete the image when you're through...
Why is it, that in just about every fandom or such-like that I have looked into, gender-bending has cropped up?
Not that I mind, since, thanks to a certain trope associated with genderbending, the results are usually pleasing to the eye.
It doesn't hurt that I hold a passing interest in genderbending myself, but who's paying attention to that?
Here's the nine main agents that have appeared in my missions:
Now I really want to write a gender-switched universe for my agents.
Not sure when it'd be set because the mission I've just done was around November 2007, so it'd be either then or present day. Without getting too spoilery, Laburnum and Drake are going to keep genderbending on occasion when off-duty for a while - she out of curiosity and because she wants to spend some time being someone else (because she has unresolved self-loathing issues left over from buggering up the Nighthunt fiasco), he because he has a creepy transformation fixation - so we could work on it somehow.
Alex Warren.
May I copy the whole thing and paste it to the_ppc or something? Just so it doesn't get eaten by the board....
Perhaps Makes-Things never got around to fixing the recovered portal from that mission. Perhaps someone tries integrating it into the current system, but it's still Sue-infected and it sends a signal to everyone's disguise generators. Or something like that.
Would that count as a PPC Crisis? It's not very crisis-like. It would really mess up the graph of PPC Crises if we did count it as one.
Anyway, I think it would be a good RP scenario. *g*
~Neshomeh
Although PPC RPs are great fun, I don't think they need to be as common as they are. Wouldn't it be more interesting -- and easier to keep track of afterwards, since RP transcripts tend to be very difficult to write up -- to let people write their own stories about the events and link them all from a central page? Then anyone who wanted to collaborate, either by writing a story together or by writing two that interacted with one another, could do so, and anyone who just wanted to write their own story could do that, too.
Just a suggestion, obviously, but...
hS
Or will it be on the Wiki? Or what?
... on whether anyone actually posts anything except in posts on the Board. :P But I will if any stories appear, yes.
hS
that makes much sense. and could do it. although, which agent shoudl be the one who triggers the mass thing? It can be drake, if you wish.
... I totally didn't just respond in-character to your first post on this thread. >.>
~Neshomeh
... I've already come up with an excuse that will allow me to reply, and it is this:
A /two person/ roleplay is just a collaborative story done in real-time. The problem is when dozens of people try to work together, it gets messy.
Ergo, I'm fully consistant if I allow myself to respond. :P
hS
abotu teh lux thing. couldn;t help myself. i apologize.
I was looking for an excuse to get them out of there anyway.
hS
was just curious. this is not PPC canon, right?
There's no reason it can't be canon... I'll be saving the story up until my two wandered off, but whether it ever sees the light of day again depends on how everyone feels about it. At the least I wouldn't post it without you, Neshomeh and Laburnum agreeing it was canon, since you participated in making it.
hS
I'd be interested in expanding the event, actually, and making the solution a little more difficult to achieve. Maybe the DORKS isn't the cause of the problem after all, or something. I don't know. For me, it's an excuse to develop Nume's character and possibly reveal some things I might not be able to otherwise simply because I can't think of a normal situation in which he'd ever let them come up. For that reason, it's better to have him (her) interacting with people other than Ilraen. That's my motivation.
'Course, I also think it would be fun to learn Dafydd and Constance's reason(s) for being back in HQ just in time for this. And to see some genderbent fire lizards. *g*
~Neshomeh
They left their home and came to HQ with swords because /somehow/ the effect reached them way out in [location deleted].
hS
That explains the very high level of homicidal-ness, then.
So... would you be interested in some kind of off-Board collaboration, then? At least to determine the cause and solution of the incident? Four-way collab... could be interesting.
~Neshomeh
Of course, in this case we have a ready-built location to discuss things without clogging up the board: Emergency Board for teh win!. But if it were to continue I would be forced, forced I say, to drag some more of my hapless Agents into it (muahaha). Dafydd and Constance aren't coming back.
hS
All in the past, extenuating circumstances, third parties, and, and... I'm better now? And if all else fails we can quite possibly arrange to do something about it when I'm actually in the same country as you this spring? ^_^;
Anyway, I have a plan this time. The plan is to go make a plan so we know where we're going before anyone starts writing anything.
Aww... no genderbent fire lizards, then? Shame.
I may also have to bring in my as-yet-unrevealed DMS team for a cameo. And we can probably work in other agents.
~Neshomeh
And I don't know... when the thing's getting sorted they might send Ilwi and Hera to see what's going on...
hS
http://disc.yourwebapps.com/discussion.cgi?disc=241484;article=1579;title=PPC%20Message%20Board
Let us discuss. {= )
~Neshomeh
The sue is carrying sue cooties. the orignal genderbending portal was caused by a prototype console that was corrupted by a sue in a fic. so it is sue technology, and thus odd. and old PPC technology, so it might have locked onto the flash badges of the agents, and modifiyed the SEPF gendertors somehow. so while the DORKS was the original cause, the returning everyone ot normal might take longer.
stormsong has the DORKS now. drake was a tricky little fox. looks like the dorks was given back. he has put two and two together and realized that people don't like Lux. although, for him, two adn two come out to many. (yes, discworld troll joke)
Speak for yourself. The Assassins may be wary of someone so tactile, but the Bad Slashers get on fine with her, so long as she keeps her hands to herself.
As I'm working with time constraints, I was effectively out as soon as people stopped taking turns. We can just assume my two gave up and slammed the door on the whole mess. ... Except not really slam, because it's a Star Trek sliding door. {= P
~Neshomeh
Nyx and Dassie
"How do they expect us to work like this?" Nyx demanded. She -- or rather, he -- waved his sword vaguely. "My muscles are all wrong!"
Dassie sipped her cup of coffee. "Well, the Plot Continuum still needs protecting," she said vaguely. "And Agents still need patching up. They can't really afford to give us a break, especially with so many of our colleagues transformed too."
Nyx wasn't listening. "Didn't we save their hides during the Invasion?" he ranted. "And the Reorganisation. The least they could do, the absolute least..."
Dassie leant back in her chair. This sounded like it would take a while.
Louise and Narto
"... Lou," Narto said in a strangely high voice.
"Yes, Nar?"
"Why am I a girl?"
Louise looked round at her. "For giggles," he said, grinning. "I was bored."
"You were bored," Narto repeated flatly. "And when you're bored, you..."
"Hop across to a comic I know and steal some cool tech, yes," Lou finished for her. "Isn't it fun?"
"I have curves in all the wrong places," Narto muttered. "And what if someone comes over?"
"We'll just have to be busy," Lou said dismissively, and held out a hand. "Ms. Telyan, will you join me in the hot tub?"
Narto stared at him for a moment, and then laughed. "Certainly I will, sir," she said, and off they went.
Constance and Dafydd
"Dafydd, please put the sword down."
Dafydd swung around to look at Constance. "They can't get away with this!" she exclaimed. "Elves may be girly, but I'm not female!"
"You are now," Constance said, eying her amusedly. "Come on, it's not that bad. I'm not having any trouble."
Dafydd scowled at him. "Says you," she muttered darkly. "But come on, Connie, they can't get away with this."
"Probably not," Constance agreed cheerfully. Reaching into a closet, he pulled out a sword. Dafydd blinked.
"Um."
"Yeeeees?"
"Your... er, your sword is on fire?"
Constance looked at it startledly. "Why, so it is! How clever of you to notice." He beamed.
"... right, then." Dafydd looked around. "Tanfin's asleep?"
"He is," Constance agreed. "Unless it's she by now." He swung his sword experimentally. "So shall we go and knock on the doors of HQ?"
Dafydd grinned. "Let's get knocking," she said, and headed for the door.
~
hS
At the knock on the door, two things happened. A female voice shouted "No, don't--!", and the door was opened. The opener was a purplish-furred female Andalite.
<Hello,> said she.
"Dammit, Ilraen," grumbled the first voice, which belonged to a tall, thin, angry-looking woman who stood with her arms crossed awkwardly over her breasts. "Well, who is it? What do they want?"
<Please excuse my partner,> said Ilraen. <We are not usually... um... like this. He--she--Agent Supernumerary is not very happy about it.> Beat. <Er, do you know that your sword is on fire?>
~Neshomeh
"Um. Er." Dafydd looked distinctly nonplussed. Beside her, Constance grinned.
"Yes, it is," he said. "Full marks for observation, fuzzy horse thing." He looked at his... er... husband? Wife? His spouse and muttered, "Come on, elf, say your thing."
"... oh, right." Dafydd brandished her own sword. "Blah blah blah dramatic and threatening speech," she said, "but seriously, either you two tell us who's responsible for genderbending us, or we start breaking things."
"We're very good at that," Constance said, although his sword hardly needed any further comment.
hS
Ilraen suddenly felt very naked without her larger male tail-blade, but she instinctively raised the one she had at the moment. <Um... I do not think that would be productive.>
"We didn't do it," Nume said. "We don't know who did, either."
<Perhaps we could assist you in locating the responsible party as an alternative to pointless violence?>
~Neshomeh
"Oh, it wouldn't be pointless violence," Constance said with a lethal-looking grin, lifting his sword, but Dafydd nudged him with an elbow.
"Connie," she muttered, "you're acting look... I don't know, like a human male or something."
Constance poked his tongue out at her. "Probably all the testosterone," he admitted. "But come on, they're asking for it."
Dafydd rubbed her temples wearily. "Seriously, guys," she said, "you don't know what this is like. It's insane."
hS
"Tch," scoffed Nume, pushing her way forward to stand by Ilraen's flank. "'Guys,' she says. Look, whatever this is, it got us, too. You think I want to be like this? It's all..." She gestured hopelessly at her modified body. "Things are internal where they should be external and, and protruding where they shouldn't be. I know how insane it is."
Ilraen nodded. <This is my first experience of a female of my species. It is very strange.>
~Neshomeh, running off for a bit now.
Drake goes rushing by the door, in full harem girl outfit, giggling as she dashes by.
She is holding a rubber chicken, which changes to a teddy bear in a tutu as she runs be, followed by a male agent, wielding a backpack. “Come back here DRAKE!!! You’ve gone too far.”
"DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!"
A large male stoat, bristling with anger and carrying a rapier with clear intent to use it, stalked around the corner, followed by a small slender weasel jill with a lute strapped to her back.
"I did NOT need this to happen again!" the stoat snarled. "I don't know how you did this, and I don't care! Just turn us back!"
A small fuzzy whirlwind appeared around the other corner and screeched to a halt, revealing itself to be a small ferret. "Hi, New Mama! Hi, Uncle Stormy! The nursery lady started screaming about summink and dropped me ..." He sniffed. "You look funny. Should I call you Daddy now, Mama?"
The mustelids looked at each other. "Well, at least one of us doth seem to be coping," the weasel said wryly.
"She's a Dibbun, you can hardly tell the difference anyway."
Naomi gasped and ran back, then stared.
"Wait, you too?"
She asked, totally confused, then looked in through the open door, looking at the four agents inside, then gulping.
"Errrrrr, I take it that you got gender bent too? I swear, I have no clue what my partner did, but I remember that DORKS. Drake had it on a mission where he came back wearing very funny cloths. Makes Things said something about sue cooties or something, I don;t think he managed OT fix it before he died. We got it back, but apparently it still has problems."
Dafydd looked at Constance. "Hmm."
Constance nodded. "Hmm indeed," he said.
Looking at the new arrival, Dafydd raised an eyebrow. "So... it's your partner's doing, then?" she asked. At her side, Constance raised his (still-on-fire) sword and grinned.
hS
She gulped, looking at the sword, and clearly guessing the intent.
"Errrr, i think so. I have no clue what happened to that DORKS!!!"
she spoots Storm and SKy, or what she assumes are them, and Molly too.
"Say, Storm, Sky? what happened on that mission? What woudl cause a DORKS to genderbend agents? "
she asks, then looks back.
"Please, let's figure out why this could have happened before we declare open fox season on my partner, okay?"
Nume's wrath had now carried her all the way out into the hallway. "I have a better idea. Let's figure out if this can un-happen. If that requires a fox-hunt, I'm all for it."
Ilraen, who was by this time Earth-savvy enough to understand the reference, eyed her partner suspiciously. Coming from three of four eyes, this was nothing to sneeze at. <You are not riding me again,> she said. <That was a very singular occasion, and in any case, I cannot be certain this new body is quite strong enough. It feels more... dainty.>
Nume stared in utter horror. "Ilraen, if you ever use that word again, I'm going to have to hurt you."
Ilraen was the absolute picture of wounded innocence. <You would injure a female?>
Her partner turned in desperation to Dafydd and Constance. "Can we kill the fox now?"
~Neshomeh
Constance's eyes lit up, possibly because he was holding a burning sword in front of them. "Oh, let's," he said, gleefully.
Dafydd rolled her eyes. "All right, so it's tempting," she admitted. "But murder is rarely the answer, Connie. Unless the question is a 'Sue."
"She's kind of Sueish," Constance said reasonably. "I mean, talking animals are pretty unusual, right?"
"They were," Dafydd corrected. "We've been gone long enough that they might be common now." She glanced at the Agents referred to as Storm and Sky meaningfully.
"Nevertheless," Constance said, frowning, "I propose we kill her. Has it crossed your mind that this might have affected Hera and Ilwion?"
His spouse winced at the thought of genderbent fire lizards. "All right, I'm convinced," she said. "Murder it is."
hS
Stormsong ducked forwards and stood in front of Drake. "'Twould not be a good idea to slay the one who caused this. After all, if he caused it, he must know how to change it back."
Drake grinned. "Aww, I knew there was a reason I like you."
"The no-touching rule is still in place, Drake."
((... when she realised no one was chasing her any more.
hS))
she most likely did. although, she is pretty smart at times.
"A huntm, right? Lux tuaght me this game, or tried ot explain bu meany naomi interrupted."
that said, DRake giggled, than ran off again, giggling fleeing down the corridor.
Naomi sighed. "Look, can we instead of killing him, just injure him instead? he is my partner, after all...."
Dafydd drummed her fingers on her sword handle. "If we just injure her -- or him, or whatever..." She shook her head. "I'll be so glad to go back to normal. If we just injure her -- sorry, what was your name? -- can you make sure she doesn't do this again?"
"Nooooo," Constance protested, waving his sword around. "Come on, friend of horsey-thing-person, you're with me on this, aren't you? She totally needs killing!"
((... Constance is starting to disturb me))
hS
Naomi sighed. "Look, i'm just worried that if you kill him, my next partner will be LUX!!!!!"
She turned bacl to S&S . "you still haven;t answered me. What happened on the mission? any reason why the DORKS woudl genderbend people? We have to know, please...." she begged.
"I don't know, I'm not a technician," Skyfire said, shrugging. "He must have done something pretty impressive to it to make it transform everyone in HQ, and that suggests that he must have enlisted expert help ... Do any of Lux's flings work in the tech department? Strikes me as something she would approve of, and so would anyone demented enough to like her."
Ansela yelled as he came round the corner, dragging Drake behind him. "Crazy bitch ran into me, giggling like a sugar-high Sue and waving a DORKS around like a mad thing. Almost put an arrow through her chest before she yelled that she was an Agent."
Naomi goraned, "He's my partner. And..." she gasped as she noticed something... "WHERES THE DORKS!!!!!!"
she quickly snapped at the others, "Please, no killing him until we can sort this out, okay?"
"I gave it to some agent, don;t know who. some funny male."
OOC: Dunno if I should post this here or in a different subthread, but I'll just post my Agents' responses. This is set after my Agents' latest, in-progress mission(#3 OOC, #6 IC).
There was a low pitched humming noise as a glowing portal appeared in the middle of RC-1138B. A dull thump quickly followed as an exhausted, soot-covered Alex Warren fell through it and landed heavily on the sofa. Hugging a cushion with one arm, he massaged his temple with the other. "Never, never again..." he groaned into the cushion. He looked up from the sofa as an equally battered but still standing Drental stepped through, holding a backpack that was bulging slightly at the seams. Alex's eyes narrowed as he saw glitter stains seeping through his bag.
"Drental, you didn't put the Sue's scalp in my bag, did you?"
The Mandalorian Agent shrugged, causing Alex to start spluttering.
"Drental, all my stuff's in there!"
Drental shrugged again.
"It's not like a little glitter will damage it."
Right on cue, the Overpower caused the Suvian blood to start burning a hole in Alex's prized ROTS novelization. It then waited for Alex to give it its next cue.
Alex opened and closed his mouth several times, then closed it when he couldn't think of a good counterargument. A moment of silence later, he sat up and looked at his partner.
"Seriously though, that thing was a nightmare. Grievous, droids, and a regenerating Sue at the same time. Why the hell didn't they list that on the report?"
"The writer went mad and thinks he's a rubber duck now, remember?" Drental replied dryly.
"And the first person and body change...Honestly, I hope that never happens to us again."
Pop.
Alex sighed, looking down at herself for a moment before going back to her previous position on the sofa. Drental, meanwhile, simply shrugged and continued taking off his now somewhat uncomfortable armour.
"You'd think I would have learned to keep my mouth shut by now," Alex mused. There were shouts from outside, and Alex blinked.
"Looks like we're not the only ones..."
Skyfire shook his head. "Oh no. Please, Drake, tell me you did not potentially give that thing to Lux."
"Okay, I did not give it to Lux, potentially."
Naomi looked at drake.
"Aer you telling the truth?"
"Not really, but she did ask me to tell her tha...."
Naomi had snapped and smacked drake with teh backpack.
"CRAZY FOX!!!!!!"
All we have to do is ask her, him, for it back, right? It's not that..." Ansela trailed off as the others looked at him incredulously. "What? Lux can be reasonable."
"..." Constance lowered his sword at last and looked across at Dafydd. "Lux is in control of our bodies," he said flatly.
Dafydd looked around at the assembled Agents. "You think they can handle it?" she asked dubiously.
"I certainly hope so," Constance replied, "because I'm not going to. Not against Lux."
"Me either," Dafydd said grimly. "She's -- he's -- too much."
"Time to go, then?" her spouse asked. Dafydd nodded, and looked at the group again.
"Well, it's been fun," she said, "but we'll be going home now. If you decide to burn the place down, do let us know."
"Not that you know where we live, thank goodness," Constance added. He shot a look at Drake. "And if this doesn't get sorted out, we'll be back. With two irate fire lizards in tow."
Dafydd grinned wryly. "Who needs fear of God?" she asked the air above her. "Come on, Connie, let's go home." And with that, the pair walked away. Again.
hS
DRake gigle d and squiremed free, adn dropped a ocutpuis jar in Stormsons's arms, kissed him, then dashed off.
Naomi was about to chase when teh jar phrapped and morphed into a doll.
"That sneaky son of a vixen. He had it all alone.... Or else he got it back."
Stormsong fumbled the object and narrowly avoided dropping it. "So, ah, should we take this back to the technicians? I have no idea what to do with the cursed object ..."
"Sure. let's head to the way. Although, Storm, did you want to just mess with it instead, see if we can fix this withotu the techinicans?"
"Drake, I shall be cruel to be kind," explained the weasel, grinning ominously. "On a scale of bad ideas, the idea of 'messing' with this thing would be somewhere between walking around an OFU with one's sex changed without telling anyone and trying to store a poisonous snake in one's pocket. Thou hast already done the former. Please do not move further along the scale."
naomi looed oddly at Stormsong, and smacked herself.
"DRake's long gone. I asked that. I think that was due to this body. Being male seems to make me want ot take odd risks, no offense to your gender Stormie."
"Still. Bad move." Stormsong handed over the device. "We should take this to the technical department."
In the DoSAT, they waited as the machine was examined.
"Bad news," said the tech, looking up from the workbench. "I don't know what you've done to this thing, but basically it's completely screwed up. I can fix it, but it'll take me a while."
"How long?" asked Skyfire.
"... Twenty-four hours, or thereabouts."
Mulhoon looked down at her black dress. Her hair was tied up in a severe bun, and she appeared rather impassive about the whole business.
Appearances, however, can be deceptive. In a voice as calm as the eye of a hurricane, she said, "Someone is going to die."
Render grinned at her. "Lighten up," the younger woman said. "This is kinda fun."
Mulhoon ignored her, pausing only to strap on her revolver before stalking out of the response centre to find the being responsible and make them suffer.
(( *is being horribly tempted by this thread* ))
Alex poked her head out of the RC's doorway, looking from side to side. As she watched, a scantily clad fox holding a box of ramen noodles ran past followed by a group of very angry Agents yelling at the top of their lungs. Shaking her head, Alex stepped back inside. A moment later, a flaming frisbee whistled past the doorway where her head had been a moment earlier and she hastily closed the door. Drental watched all this with some amusement from the console chair.
"Going somewhere?"
Alex shook her head.
"Chances are Medical's clogged up, and it'll get cleared up eventually. Besides," Alex said, a smile spreading across her face. "it's not like we'll get a mission until this is over."
"True."
Walking over to a table standing next to the bathroom door, Alex picked up one of several stacks of books piled up on it. Glancing at his partner, Drental noted titles such as "Your Mind Makes It Real: How To Use Generic Substance", "Dalek: A Complete History" and "100 Ways To Kill a Warrior! Sue". Falling heavily onto the sofa, Alex opened up the first book and began reading, dead to the world.
As soon as he opens the book, there is a knock at the door. If he opens it, there is noone ot be scene at normal height. A small vixen does streak into the room once the door is opened though.
And L&F's OFUR forms, just for fun:
It's Drake's expression of utter glee that really makes them, I think. :P
hS
Drake likes transforming juuuuuust a little more than most agents do.
(I don't entirely get the appeal, but I see nothing wrong with it, and if it's voluntary and/or reversible and/or meant to be funny I'm fine with using it for fanservice myself.)
especailly drake. Love the large railgun. and i do think that it is as large as she is. makes thigns was right to be nervous.
and love naomi as well.
(He's a hare.)
THIS should be the right one:
Why?
...Oh, wait. This is the PPC. Insanity. I forgot. :P
It's fun torturing our characters. By which I mean it's an interesting mental exercise, thinking about just how different they might be if they were the opposite sex. How would they be treated differently? How would a different brain organization/different hormones affect them? How would they feel about it?
That's my take, anyway. {= )
~Neshomeh