A much-delayed review. by
PoorCynic
on 2014-04-16 02:48:00 UTC
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First off, let me take off my cap to you (pretend I'm wearing a cap for the purpose of this figure of speech). It's hard to break out of the formula of "snark at the Sue, rage, kill the Sue" that so prevalent in the PPC. But this mission did it in a way that didn't seem forced or out of place. So kudos to you.
I also liked the emphasis on the cartoon nature of the disguises. The scene where Doc gets clunked by the bombs and gets the little flock of books flying around his head is a good example. Very Who Framed Roger Rabbit. It's also nice to be reminded that the disguises are more than just hard light holograms (or whatever we said they were again).
Not too much I can say in regards to problems. I did think that Doc's Gollumesque reactions at the beginning and the end were a bit unrealistic considering what is happening, but that's just a matter of my own taste.
I look forward to seeing your next updates.
Nice work! by
Neshomeh
on 2014-04-04 18:46:00 UTC
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Various people have already mentioned the things I like most about it—the meta, the agents exploring their Toonish forms, the parallel between the choices offered in the game and Vania's decision at the end, the way Millie redeems herself by giving the Heart back. All very enjoyable. ^_^ I remember thinking Doc should have known better than to go investigate the bomb when it didn't go off, because cartoon bombs always wait to go off until the person who set them comes to see why they haven't, but it still made a good gag.
I was a little sad that they threw away the extra paintbrush, though. Probably a wise decision on the agents' part, but taking Sue artifacts as souvenirs is a fine old PPC tradition! I can't help but feel they missed an opportunity for some fun in HQ, or at least some good bartering.
Also, the Poison Joke problem didn't get resolved. Is that something that'll happen in the next interlude?
I caught a couple technical errors:
* "Once she saw Mickey, the two characters introduced each other" - Did you mean "introduced themselves"? Otherwise, Millie is introducing Mickey and vice versa, which doesn't make much sense. I wouldn't put it past the badfic, but I'd think such an odd thing would warrant full inclusion in the mission rather than glossing over it. {= )
* "[Um. No. We’re technically toons right now, thanks to the disguise generator.] She gave a meek grin. [We would have melted, too.]" - The underline continues between the two bits of speech, and that seems to be anomalous.
BTW, I think the argument challenge was probably one of hS's writing challenges. VM wrote a couple of Cafeteria stories for the same one, as I recall.
~Neshomeh
I had saves by
Tomash
on 2014-04-04 06:40:00 UTC
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Back last August, I archived the Board (in case we wanted to move to Tomash!Board and keep old posts). The archive goes to somewhere in June 2008. I grabbed the RP in question out of the archive and posted it at this beta instance of Board 1.49...
(If anyone has any other threads they want rescued from doom, let me know.)
Nice! by
Ailavyn Siniyash
on 2014-04-04 05:40:00 UTC
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I quite enjoyed it, even without knowledge of Epic Mickey. (The only thing I know about it is that there's a brush mechanic that may or may not be similar to Okami's.)
I think my favorite part was the rapid-pace time-skips and the way you handled them. I got very vivid mental images.
-Aila
Well done! by
eatpraylove
on 2014-04-04 03:52:00 UTC
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I liked the part where Millie apologized to Yen Sid and gave his Heart back. Very classic Disney; if only more Sues redeemed themselves like that. (Also, Doc calling his bookcase "The Precious" XD) Have you played Epic Mickey? I heard it was pretty good.
Are we going to see interludes featuring Millie and Olsen in the Nursery? I think that'd be really adorable ^_^
Nice mission by
Ozzielot
on 2014-04-04 01:34:00 UTC
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I've only seen bits of Epic Mickey and I haven't gotten around to playing it.
The Poison Jokes effects are amusing.
It's great when you describe the settings and the minis. I've only been recently reading missions on continuum I have very little knowledge of (now that I have read some, I got to read some funny ones), so it's great to not feel lost when reading it.
Nice Job by
sjosten
on 2014-04-03 18:49:00 UTC
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I know you said that you're unsure of this one, but I thought it was a well done little mission. Probably a bit shorter than normal, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Plus, it's nice to see some Epic Mickey stuff.
Good mission! by
Herr Wozzeck
on 2014-04-03 15:41:00 UTC
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Doc and Vania had fun conversations this time around, and it was fun to watch them try to get used to their weirdly-altered states and all that. I also like that you didn't kill the Sue this time: Vania's reasoning is actually pretty correct, and I could see why she thought of recruiting her to the PPC. It's always nice to remind people that killing a Sue isn't the only option, you know?
I do think you're right that this doesn't feel as strong as, say, your Fahrenheit 451 mission. I think the main issue is actually something that's not entirely your fault: I think said issue is that the fic being sporked just doesn't have enough material to sustain a PPC mission like this. Its only real sin is that it seems to read like an especially bad synopsis of a prospective fic, and I think that might've restricted the amount you could do with it. Most notably for me, I think that this could have led to the Ostown part of the mission being a hair too long, though take that with a grain of salt since you do manage to get quite a bit to do there regardless.
Other than that one thing, though, it was a good mission, and it's been too damn long since the last one.
And on a side note... I can't be the only one that was thinking of this every time I read Millie's name: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SdyCkZpMBlM
Neat! by
EileenAlphabet
on 2014-04-03 10:01:00 UTC
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I've heard about Epic Mickey and it looks really cool, but sadly I've never gotten around to playing it, since I don't own a Wii.
But from your mission you give a really good impression of the game. I like the part about how in the game, you can chose between a quick "evil" solution or a more difficult "good" one (reminds me a bit of Mass Effect) and how it ends up tying into your agents' decision. And much as I love to hate the truly horrible Stus and Sues, it's nice to see one every once in a while who is not truly, irredeemable bad. So it was a good choice of fic to go with that canon.
Uh. Um. That's not good. by
Huinesoron
on 2014-04-03 06:58:00 UTC
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I'll get onto the people at YourWebApps and find out what's going on. Hopefully we can at least get the history restored long enough to take a backup (if we can find a way to do that) - though, actually, didn't Tomash do that once already? I hope so; it would save a good deal of trouble.
hS