There is one tense shift:
The turian caught the RA, nodding as he walked to the portal. “Thanks,” he says.

HG

There's a slight shift to first-person in the DIC interlude: “I have a PS3 in one of my bags,” I comment. “You want to play Persona 3 FES with me?”

...I really loved this. It was really warm, tender and sweet (especially the Cindy-Ilraen moment!), it was quite touching really. I hope you write more of these interludes in the future!

~Autumn

Hieronymus Graubart already pointed out a lot of the mechanical stuff I noticed in the RC 1810 interlude, so I'll just add a reminder to watch out for redundancies and overuse of adverbs and other modifiers in your writing. Hopefully you know the kinds of things I'm talking about by now, so I won't get into it. {= )

In response to the piece itself, I have to say my overall impression is that of awkwardness. This is not a bad thing! I like that you take the time to deal with how out of place Zerenze feels in the whole situation: alien body, alien world, alien language, alien courtship... I'd complain if it wasn't awkward for him. Also, I can totally relate to having no idea what the hell you're doing, but wanting to see it through anyway just in case it turns out to be awesome (which, as my shiny wedding ring attests, it did!).

I would like to know even more of his thoughts and feelings in all this, though. Seeing as it is so bizarre, not just for him personally but for Sangheili as a race, what is it about Eusabius that makes him worth it for Zerenze to stick his neck out so far, and what is it about Zerenze that allows him to? Are Sangheili capable of physical intimacy in the way we understand it, but just generally choose not to engage in it? Is Zerenze somehow different from other members of his species if he's capable of this kind of relationship? If so, why? How? I know I'm speaking from deep ignorance since I'm not familiar with the canon, Zerenze's origins, or how this relationship got started, but it's an important set of questions. I don't want to declare this is happening just because the plot says so, since I haven't done my homework, but when you point out that it's not typical and proceed to do it anyway, one must wonder.

I'd also like to know more about the Sangheili side of things, just out of regular curiosity. If they're not big on physical intimacy, how do they go about having relations? Maybe this could be grounds for another interlude, where Zerenze gets to take Eusabius out on an Elite-style date. Turnabout is fair play, right? {= D

A question: does Maria la O routinely let gay couples meet at her place, like a clandestine service she provides, or is it just because she's friends with Eusabius? Maybe I missed the explanation of this in the Spanish... I'm afraid mine's not great, though some of it did come back to me trying to read the Spanish dialogue here. I guess it just felt a little odd to me personally, especially since she hung around for a while to play records and hand out cigars. If I were trying to have a safe, private tryst with a new lover, I'd be really weirded out by even a really good friend hanging around watching us have cute bonding moments on her balcony. Like, thanks, really appreciate the safe space, but go away now? O.o;

A point that could be clarified: I think I recall you saying somewhere (maybe the mission I looked at?) that Zerenze and Eusabius don't actually have any kind of intercourse at this time, but between the way Eusabius talks up his big plans and the fact that we jump to them mostly naked in bed together, it's not at all clear. You miiight wanna do something about that, because based on their date, I do think that would be moving way too fast for poor Z. ^^;

Oh, I enjoyed getting some of Eusabius' backstory in this. It's not a lot of information, but it's just enough to imagine the broad strokes of what his life was like for a while, and I admire his coping skills. He seems like the kind of person who always manages to land on his feet and seems to sail along like nothing can touch him, even if you know he has to be tied up in knots on the inside. He's a pretty cool guy.

---

For the other one, I can't believe I missed this, but it appears that Annie is wearing nothing but a bathrobe during the whole visit. ^^; I mean, theoretically we can assume she changes in the scene break between when she invites Xanthus to stay and the post-dinner bit, but it strikes me that she might want to do that before she starts making dinner.

Otherwise, I think the whole "Relocation" interlude works really well, even if they don't actually relocate physically. There's nice symmetry with the agents furiously packing and then furiously-in-a-totally-different-sense unpacking (darn Flowers!), and the two parts tie into each other well, what with Cindy and Anneli talking about Ilraen getting Xanthus thinking about visiting Annie. It's a solid little piece, and I'm happy to have been a part of it. {= )

~Neshomeh

I didn’t expect that I would enjoy slash, but this was lovely. Aila said it already better than I can do.

On the other hand: ouch!

Eusabius and Zerenze walked the streets of Havana, with Zerenze watching all the activity surrounding them. It was of course rather late at night, with Zerenze following Eusabius.
Both subordinate clauses starting with “with Zerenze” looks odd. Are you sure this is what you wanted to do?

Also, there are some temporary tense shifts:

“So…” Zerenze says. “This is a busy place.”

“You shall see, my dear Zerenze,” Eusabius replied. “For now, I believe we are getting close.” He nods.

Zerenze pointed at Maria. “You mean she knows,” he says. “About… well… you.”

Eusabius nods. “Just do not tell that to José or Ernesto,” says Eusabius.

“Z, in all honesty?” asks Eusabius.

“Hm… you know what this calls for,” says Maria.

Eusabius looked up at him. “I take it you have never danced to music before,” he says.

“I don’t know,” Florestan says.

“Aliens?” Florestan asks.

He shrugs.

“Yes,” says Eusabius.

And a case for the Repetitive Department of Repetition:
And immediately, one of the men seated at the table immediately stood up.
But with the third immediately I wonder whether this is intentional. Is there a joke I don’t get?

“Is that so?”I ask. Are you secretly Eusabius?

Eusabius then placed his head in this palm. There’s a “t” too much?

“Stranger for me,” I comment. So now you are secretly Zerenze?

“Of course,” Eusabius said as lightly tapped Zerenze’s bottom, smirking playfully. There’s a “he” missing?

“I have a PS3 in one of my bags,” I comment. Wave Crest? I’m beginning to see a system here. Now I wait for you secretly being Florestan.

I have to take a break before I dare to read the other interlude.

HG

The tender moments were wonderfully done, and the emotions were all so very real. It was touching and sweet, both of them, but it kept the humour that is so very PPC. Watching
Zerenze trying to figure out 1940's Havana and interacting with Eusabius is utterly adorable, and I definitely ship them. The Ilraen-Cindy conversation was also very sweet, as well as Xanthus going to check on Annie. I have to admit I don't know much about your agents' backstory, but I really didn't need to, which is a good thing.

Great interludes!

-Aila