Subject: What the...? What in the name of all that is holy...?!
Author:
Posted on: 2015-02-17 20:47:00 UTC

Just... WTF?!?!?

Did the Suethor even think about what is actually plausible?! WHY did she decide to shoehorn ninja skills in; isn't being a wizard Speshul enough?!
And riddle me this, Suethor:
How could Rose possibly have learned ninja skills; the Dursleys would not have let her!
If Rose is a ninja, then why is she staying with the Dursleys? She could, for example, survive in the forest! (And that would only serve to increase how formidable of a person she is.)
And why does Dudley even bully her, since bullies only pick on those who cannot fight back!

And that's just the first few paragraphs!

*breathes hard*

Iximaz, I salute your high tolerance for BS.

Ugh, what could possess someone to even write this?!
*headwall*

Query, though: Am I misreading, or am I to assume that Rose goes everywhere in the buff?

Good luck with the rest of the series. Let's hope that Agent Rina, unable as she is to indulge in any Bleep, doesn't become indisposed soon after!

*offers Full Restore for Zeb and Butterbeer for Rina.*
Here. You'll need it.

A few errors:
1) Zeb’s keen ears still caught what she said.

“Damn rookie…”


You should replace that period after "she said" with a colon.

2) Polkiesses
Mini-Aragog. Remove that first E; it should be "Polkisses".

3) reigning in the electricity
Homophone error. Remove the G; it should be "reining in".

4) It’s to show how calm and collected she in in the face of danger!
I believe you meant to say "how calm and collected she is in the face of danger"?

5) Zeb, his eyes watering and wishing desperately he could burn his nose off to be rid of the smell, just nodded.
Zeb's eyes were wishing? Some rewording might be needed here. Consider this: "Zeb just nodded as his eyes watered; he was desperately wishing that he could burn his nose off to be rid of the smell."

6) mass neutralization
I believe you meant to say "mass neuralyzation"?

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