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Come join the afterparty here!

I really like the way you weave together a bunch of different strands - the agents' fleeting encounters in two separate violent events becomes an actual theme, not just a coincidence. And it's always nice to see a depiction of the Cafeteria which really captures the feel of the place.

hS

Ajax was following close behind. "I didn't now you've seen that show."

"Well it was a while ago, Never really seen anything past season 3," Matthew answered. They both took a seat.

Agent Nameless Admin is part of Special Interdepartmental Elven Languages Unit.
Their main fandoms are Percy Jackson and the Olympians/Heroes of Olympus, Stargate, and Transformers, but they keep getting missions into RWBY.
A rubber chicken is their preferred weapon.
Critical reasoning is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Nameless Admin is infamous for accidentally getting dyed blue for a month.
They are considered mostly lucid.

Dyed blue? Nameless Admin is Al's Waiter and/or Vemi. You heard it here first.

hS

(PS: Is the Admin the only person besides me in SIELU? That amuses me no end.)

Please have a pot of black-hole coffee. I also hope you're in for a permanent return. Speaking of that, do you have any intention of returning to your OFU?

Oh, and my agents are all open for aSimilation (doctorlit had a really good idea here)!

Despite being high on glittery sugar, she was holding a big tray of cookies, and a tall glass of purple foamy drink. She grinned. "Having fun?"

"Only you would be still happy about that much wrongness, kiddo," said William with a stein of beer in hand. He glanced at the dark-haired practitioner and smiled faintly. "Hey, Mari."

A bit of a shame, I like psionics. Oh well, I'll go for a elf magus for my character then. Main idea was rather a fighter/'mage' class, and magus do this really well.

"Well, that was for a really interesting thing to do," Richard Legard said, eating his beef bourguignon. "As far as I know, mass exorcisms are really rare. And first time going around Equestria too. Although I guess we'll end up there again someday. Or at Canterlot High... "

"That wasn't so exceptional, just doing an exorcism with a lot of people in a forest trying to attack us," Marina said, who was...devouring a couscous. "The opportunity of trying this form of magic was interesting however, even if it was brief." She also poured herself a large cup of coffee, before drinking it as fast as possible. "Ugh, I think I can still feel the taste of sugar in my mouth. I want to kill this Sue again."

"Yes. I never saw that much urple prose..."

First, my agents.

Agent Richard Legard is part of the Department of Character Protective Services.
Their main fandoms are Yu Yu Hakusho, CLAMP, and A Song of Ice and Fire, but they keep getting missions into Firefly.
Critical reasoning is their preferred weapon.
A giant spork is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Richard Legard is infamous for reading bad fiction from the 1600s aloud through the corridors.
They are considered not all there.

Now, I can iagine him in this department, reading ASoIaF, a bit CLAMP... But no knowledge of the two others. Lie the weapon and th surprise, and the rest of the trivia is adequate.

Agent Marina Nicodelli is part of Building Maintenance.
Their main fandoms are The Inheritance Cycle, Babylon 5, and The Phantom of the Opera, but they keep getting missions into Tokyo Mew Mew.
A longsword is their preferred weapon.
A katana is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Marina Nicodelli is infamous for telling people pollen is plant sperm.
They are considered a little crazy for the PPC.

Hum, I've got a massive nothing here about Marina. Maybe other could see her as crazy, but for the rest... I'd totally like these weapons for me, though

And after that, results for my Boarder pseudo and real name!

Agent Richard redacted is part of the Division of Cool and Unusual Punishment.
Their main fandoms are Kingdom Hearts, Dragon Ball, and The Legend of Zelda, but they keep getting missions into The Phantom of the Opera.
A lightsaber is their preferred weapon.
A chainsaw is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Richard is infamous for getting too heated about whether a certain fanfiction was a Mary Sue fic or not and ending it with a duel.
They are considered boringly sane.

Alright, I can see me in this department, and I read DB, but my knowledge about the other ones... Like the lightsabeer, ut I don't have the build for a chainsaw. Besides, Zombie Survival Guide explains well why it's a bad idea. The duel, verbal perhaps, but I'm pretty sure I don't fit the boringly sane bill at all.

Agent Hardric is part of the Department of Bad Slash.
Their main fandoms are Young Wizards, Battlestar Galactica, and The Legend of Zelda, but they keep getting missions into Young Wizards.
A knife is their preferred weapon.
A shovel is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Hardric is infamous for accidentally preventing themselves from being born in one universe.
They are considered normal for the PPC.

Hahaha, no. I'm not going near Bad Slash if I can avoid it, even with a pretty long pole. Once again, blank with the fandoms, although I'll have to give Young Wizards a try someday. Knife and shovel? Why not. Normal PPCer, I can see that, and, well, I think I could be light-headed enough to provoke this...

Agent doctorlit is part of the Bad Role-play Department.
Their main fandoms are Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Harry Potter, and Battlestar Galactica, but they keep getting missions into Protectors of the Plot Continuum (wait, what?).
A pen usually is their preferred weapon.
A giant spork is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent doctorlit is infamous for giving safe *** lectures to Luxury.
They are considered boringly sane.

DMFF would have been most appropriate, but I would be okay with BRD. I've never watched Battlestar, but the other two fandoms are correct. And yes: I am a frequent user of pens, and boringly sane. I doubt Lux needs that lecture, though, considering she's managed not to get pregnant in thirteen years now.

Agent Doc is part of the Department of Temporal Offenses.
Their main fandoms are The Phantom of the Opera, Discworld, and The Inheritance Cycle, but they keep getting missions into The Phantom of the Opera.
Critical reasoning is their preferred weapon.
A very heavy book is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Doc is infamous for the Great Biting Incident of 2010.
They are considered completely stark raving mad.

. . .
You somehow engineered my agent to get the Bite, didn't you? Because I asked about it in the interlude? Yeah, you totally did. Well, the book and the reasoning are accurate, the department is funny considering my most recent published mission involved temporal distortion. Only Phantom is correct as a fandom, though.

Agent Vania Tolluk is part of FicPsych.
Their main fandoms are Percy Jackson and the Olympians/Heroes of Olympus, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Mass Effect, but they keep getting missions into Star Trek.
A whip is their preferred weapon.
A giant spork is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Vania Tolluk is infamous for balloon sword-fights on wheeled chairs through the corridors.
They are considered a pyromaniac but otherwise sane.

Vania needs FicPsych herself; I don't think she would do as a nurse there. I suspect she would spend most of her "work" time doing the wheeled sword-fight thing. Mass Effect would hypothetically be a fandom for her, though I haven't had a chance to play it yet.

Agent Séverine is part of the Department of Personnel.
Their main fandoms are Avatar, Animorphs, and Kingdom Hearts, but they keep getting missions into My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic.
A longsword is their preferred weapon.
A rolled-up newspaper is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Séverine is infamous for propositioning one of the Flowers.
They are considered not all there.

Only thing appropriate here is the rolled-up newspaper, considering her partner is part dog.

Agent Yoof is part of the Division of Mpreg.
Their main fandoms are Inuyasha, Protectors of the Plot Continuum (wait, what?), and Star Trek, but they keep getting missions into My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic.
Fire is their preferred weapon.
A gun is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Yoof is infamous for telling lewd jokes to the Flowers until everyone present gets flustered.
They are considered mostly lucid.

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno.

I'll just do my two main Nursery kids, at least for now. Let's see one possible future for them!

Agent Mollie is part of the Department of Geographical Aberrations.
Their main fandoms are World of Warcraft, Star Trek, and Firefly, but they keep getting missions into The Phantom of the Opera.
Sharp words are their preferred weapon.
A lightsaber is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Mollie is infamous for propositioning one of the Time Lords-in-Exile.
They are considered mostly lucid.

She comes far from her Disney roots. At least she gets a lightsaber—that's Disney, right?

Agent Ollie is part of the All-Purpose Department.
Their main fandoms are One Piece, Good Omens, and RWBY, but they keep getting missions into Twilight.
Logic is their preferred weapon.
A gun is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Ollie is infamous for accidentally doing a strip-tease for the wrong person.
They are considered not all there.

Man. Four separate APD Divisions? Unheard of!

Agent Miss MacKinnon is part of the Department of Personnel.
Their main fandoms are Yu Yu Hakusho, Sherlock Holmes, and Star Trek, but they keep getting missions into Stargate.
A wand is their preferred weapon.
A giant spork is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Miss MacKinnon is infamous for finding Ms. Frizzle in the middle of HQ one day.
They are considered completely stark raving mad.

Oh my glod I am writing that someday nobody else touch I have dibs now.

Who else do I have . . .

Agent Who is part of the Department of Misplaced Flora and Fauna.
Their main fandoms are Kingdom Hearts, Inuyasha, and Halo, but they keep getting missions into A Song of Ice and Fire.
Fire is their preferred weapon.
A knife is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Who is infamous for completing a mission in reverse.
They are considered mostly lucid.

Agent Paul is part of the Department of Technical Errors.
Their main fandoms are Tokyo Mew Mew, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Inuyasha, but they keep getting missions into Sherlock Holmes.
A pen usually is their preferred weapon.
A rolled-up newspaper is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Paul is infamous for propositioning one of the Flowers.
They are considered flamethrower-crazy.

Agent Fr’sst is part of the Department of Angst.
Their main fandoms are World of Warcraft, Dragon Ball, and Transformers, but they keep getting missions into comics.
A mace is their preferred weapon.
A chainsaw is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Fr’sst is infamous for finding Carmen Sandiego in the middle of HQ one day.
They are considered weirdly normal.

Yeah, that prompt is also happening. Dibs.

And some non-PPC characters?

Agent Marilena del Rena is part of the Eclectic Subdivision of Advanced Species.
Their main fandoms are comics, One Piece, and RWBY, but they keep getting missions into Babylon 5.
A boomerang is their preferred weapon.
A katana is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Marilena del Rena is infamous for accidentally making one of the dead authors spin in their grave so hard that Headquarters experienced a power surge.
They are considered weirdly normal.

Agent Aster Holt is part of Intelligence.
Their main fandoms are The Lord of the Rings, Stargate, and Les Misérables, but they keep getting missions into comics.
A mace is their preferred weapon.
Cafeteria food is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Aster Holt is infamous for catching a phoenix on fire.
They are considered actually insane.

And my real name:
Agent [] is part of Building Maintenance.
Their main fandoms are comics, One Piece, and RWBY, but they keep getting missions into Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha.
Sharp words are their preferred weapon.
A rubber chicken is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent [] is infamous for reading bad fanfiction written from inside canon universes.
They are considered boringly sane.

Ugh, animes, no. I like sharp words. And the line about in-universe fics is extremely apt, considering my view of the multiverse; plus, that was part of the premise of my second mission.

I need to head to work soon, but I think I'll drop the rest of my Nursery kids in here later.

—and doctorlit has a lot of Nursery kids concepted

The Aviator, Zeb, and Alex pushed open the doors to Rudi's, stomachs rumbling.

"You guys go grab a table, I'll get our food," the Aviator said, squeezing her way through the crowded pub to the bar.

I HAVE GLAMOROUS SEAL CLOWN LADY AND I AM FEELING ENTIRELY FRIGGIN VINDICATED! =oD

POP POP M8

My agents are certainly available for aSimilation!

—doctorlit isn't sorry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ciqAkdXQ9dw

[SCREAMS]

>Mega Evolutions are back

[SCREAMS EVEN LOUDER]

Agent SC (censoring just in case) is part of the Department of Mary Sues.
Their main fandoms are Stargate, comics, and Kingdom Hearts, but they keep getting missions into Doctor Who.
A giant spork is their preferred weapon.
A heavy purse is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent SC is infamous for letting a Ypur loose in the Sorting Room.
They are considered a pyromaniac but otherwise sane.

...What??

My alias' results are also interesting. (By which I mean, "off-base but also amusing")
Agent eatpraylove is part of the Division of Multiple Offenses.
Their main fandoms are Protectors of the Plot Continuum (wait, what?), Doctor Who, and Star Trek, but they keep getting missions into Harry Potter.
A giant spork is their preferred weapon.
Cafeteria food is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent eatpraylove is infamous for attempting to recreate Burning Man (with actual burning people).
They are considered boringly sane.

Agent Mattman The Comet is part of the Department of Temporal Offenses.
Their main fandoms are Supernatural, comics, and Redwall, but they keep getting missions into The Phantom of the Opera.
A pen usually is their preferred weapon.
A rubber chicken is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Mattman The Comet is infamous for finding Ms. Frizzle in the middle of HQ one day.
They are considered a pyromaniac but otherwise sane..

...Wut

Now for the real me!

Agent Matthew Walsh is part of Intelligence.
Their main fandoms are The Chronicles of Narnia, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, and Animorphs, but they keep getting missions into Transformers.
A whip is their preferred weapon.
A rubber chicken is something they are known for using to unexpected results.
Agent Matthew Walsh is infamous for challenging someone else to a tea duel.
They are considered boringly sane.

...More wut

I'm sorry, but psionics are off-limits. I've tried reading them, but couldn't wrap my head around their mechanics. Go with occult classes instead, if you want psychic spells.

Though I did catch the mini yu pointed out in number two...

Zeb's fear of fire comes from Little Miss Mary.

Your gifts get weirder everyday.

and brushed off his clean, unobtrusive business suit with the kind of conventionality that would have fit right in with the apron-equipped housewife of a 1950s American suburban household.
While John Clamp, the protagonist of his favourite fandom, CLAMP, had spent the last fourteen pages of badfic brutalising passing puppies, winking at nearby schoolgirls, and generally acting nothing like his (ever famous) canon self, Larfen knew better than to overreact, or add some kind of rude, critical commentary to the situation.
No. Larfen always said: 'A negative attitude leads to a negative mission!' amongst 'Practice makes perfect!' and 'Slow and steady wins the race!' and other statements he was sure were very meaningful and intelligent, and made his higher-ups think he was a very meaningful and intelligent person. He was a professional, who knew all the ins and outs of being a proper PPC agent. He had won employee of the week over four times, so far, and couldn't even count how many times he had been called a 'star player'. He spent all his free time by the local water cooler, chatting about things like the weather, the game, cars, mortgages, accounting, and other such burning topics.

It had been three weeks since he had entered the fic, and Larfen had finally decided his charge list was of suitable length. He spent more time collecting it into his bag, added the classic 'Angering agents!' to the end of it with a flourish of his pen and a quaint chuckle and, five weeks and three days into his mission, he made for the kill.
'John Clamp, or replacement thereof,'
John Clamp or replacement thereof spun around like a dog caught in the middle of browsing through inappropriate websites, urple hair swishing and whooshing through the air.
'What?'
'You are hereby charged for, section one: Character Disruptions, division oh point one: causing canon characters to be, subsection one: token lecherous jerks, subsection two: token homophobic jerks, subsection three: and/or woobies when they otherwise...'
An hour rolled by.
'Division four point five, subsection four: having a speshul name, subsection four point fifty eight: having an improbable appearance, subsection five: creating...'
The earth rotated. Plants grew. People were born. Some people died. The ones in between were, respectively, very happy and very sad. The sun went down. The sun went up.
'Section kli-alpha: subsection fifty: trivialisation of triple homocide, subsection nine and a half: misuse of the colour blue, particularly within the context of...'
Needless to say, it was very easy to assassinate a replacement when they had lapsed into bored unconsciousness.

'It's as I always say: a positive attitude makes for a positive mission.' Larfen chuckled aristocratically at his clever wordplay. The mission had gone splendidly, as they always did. The CLAMP continuum was safer than a block of wood in a complex mechanism designed to keep it still when being worked on.
'So, how's the wife?' He asked, winking a wink that was drenched in mischievous camaraderie (Larfen was never above the famous 'whacky hijinks' of his fellow agents.)
Larfen never found out how the wife was, of course. Everybody who hadn't gone the John Clamp replacement route and dropped into sleep on the spot had gone out in search of more interesting entertainment. The local wet paint and growing grass had never received such enraptured attention.
Larfen was more than happy with this - it was not interrelational connection that drove his existence, rather, the joy of a job well done and the dangling carrot that was the possibility of promotion.
And a job well done it had been. And a carrot well dangled it was.