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"Weird, the way we do this sort of thing, innit?" Deryn took a sip of her drink and grimaced. "No, thanks, think this is enough alcohol for me for now."

"I might have one, if that's all right," Leas said. "Cheers."

"Poppies is more traditional," she remarked. "Or rosemary."

Apart from anything else (including logistical difficulties with reaching her fingers to break them, given the distance between our countries of residence), how is she supposed to cowrite with me if I break her fingers?

But I personally have no opinion. *shrug*

I was reading the prologue to the Department of Bad Parody (regrettably, the only DBP story that exists), and it mentioned a Head of Department called the Kelp. He doesn't seem to head up any department that I know of, but there are three Divisions that lack heads: DAVD Intelligence, DAVD Medical, and DTO, Historical Inaccuracies Division. Should we decide which of those he heads?

I mean, have you seen GLADOS's recipe?

Your computer has merely become infatuated with another operating system: GLaDOS. No worries, however.

Please ensure that your computer does not have access to portal technology, and so long as you do that, you will be fine.

If however, your computer does have access to portal technology, you will need to dismantle it piece by piece and to make sure successful dismantling has taken place, destroy those pieces in fire. It does not need to be the lava of Mt Doom, but it can help.

And if you do spy any cake, remember, moist and delicious though it may be, it is still a lie.

(-JulyFlame)

"YAY!" said Krisp. "We're here!"
The Infernal Trio approached and took a glass each. It wasn't time yet to borrow an entire bottle for them three. Just kidding.

'Hey guys,' said the Bad Slasher, smiling round the room. She perched on the edge of a set of shelves, sniffer-dog settling down beside her. 'Happy Anniversary, I guess.' She pulled a bottle of champagne and a dog-eared cardboard box of champagne flutes from her Bag. 'Who fancies a celebratory one of these?'

I think my computer really is under the control of GLADOS, because it just listed these ingredients:
one 18.25 ounce chocolate cake mix
one can prepared coconut pecan frosting
3/4 cup vegetable oil
4 large eggs
one cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
3/4 cup butter or margarine
1 2/3 cup granulated sugar
2 cups all purpose flower
don't forget garnishes such as:
fish shaped crackers
fish shaped candies
fish shaped solid waste
fish shaped dirt
fish shaped Ethel benzine
pull n' peel licorice
fish shaped volatile organic compounds
and sediment shaped sediment
candy coated peanut butter pieces; shaped like fish
one cup lemon juice
alpha resins
unsaturated polyester resin
fiberglass surface resins
volatile malted milk impoundments
9 large egg yokes
12 medium geosynthetic membranes
one cup granulated sugar
an entry called: "How To Kill Someone With Your Bare-Hands"
2 cups rhubarb; sliced
2/3 granulated rhubarb
1 Tbsp all-purpose rhubarb
1 tsp grated orange rhubarb
3 Tbsp rhubarb; on fire
1 Large rhubarb
1 cross Bohr hole electromagnetic imaging rhubarb
2 Tbsp rhubarb juice
adjustable aluminum head positioned
slaughter electric needle injector
cordless electric needle injector
injector needle driver
injector needle gun
cranial caps
and it contains proven preservatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and oder control chemical's that will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.


I believe that if I did make this cake, it would explode in the oven. Or kill me if I ate it.

drowning IT in Bleepka. Whatever.

Meanwhile, the Infernal Trio tried to forget the incident by drowning in Bleepka, Bleepsinthe, Bleepnapps and Bleepquila. Krisp was busy socializing with everybody he could find, especially if they were female or if they were sitting alone in a corner.
South and Whatev mingled in the conversations. The Trio was enjoying itself. It was almost like the old days with the other tall ships.

First were Cassie and Nat, accompanied by Kelvin as usual. Although the two girls couldn't really say they knew anybody from the Invasion last year, they'd taken the opportunity to meet people and have a couple of drinks - and pay their respects to the Agents whom they knew had to have died. They snagged a Bleepka cocktail each and mingled with the crowd, with Kelvin trailing behind them sipping at a glass of wine. For some reason, the Elf got nervous in crowded places and preferred to stick to the company of people he knew.

Not far behind them came two people who seemed to give off the impression that they didn't want to be associated. The taller of the two, a solidly-built man in his mid-thirties with auburn hair and an eyepatch who went by the name of Luke Celinus, looked a little serious as he entered. However, once he was able to mingle with the crowd he began to relax and flirt somewhat with the majority of the female Agents he met.

The smaller Agent, a woman coming up for thirty with red hair and the name of Jessie Lancaster, rolled her eyes and headed in a completely different direction, intending to actually commemmorate the sad events of last year.

Finally, a Japanese man wearing the DAVD flashpatch and glasses came in. Quietly sneaking over to the drinks table, he lifted a glass in memory of his teenage partner, who had died in the catastrophe, and downed it. "Here's to you, Reece," he murmured.

and i know it is obsessed because of this:

GLADOS is an acronym for Genetic Lifeform And Disk Operating System

"Well, I'll take the white ones. Sorry, Krisp is being unstable today, I don't know what happened. Krisp, are you OK?" What' took three white roses and gave one each to South and Krisprolls.
"Well, I feel a bit better now. Thanks, What' and South."

"Why not," said Whatever. "Krisp, South, you can take some too."
They did.
"And Krisp, if you could avoid saying something stupid this time."
"Like what? 'If only I'd been there,' for example? Like being there mattered! It didn't last time! You kept saying that, but it didn't! I was there and..."
"Krisp, I wasn't thinking about that!"
"Krisp, are you OK?"
"Uh, well, yes, I guess so, well, doesn't matter, I'm OK now."

OOC: Krisp remembers winessing his mother's death. What' wasn't there and kept blaming himself for a while.

Maybe the Axis of Confectionary infected it through the crack in its screen. Random cake cravings are a sure sign of posession by the Pineapples.
...
Wait, how do you know it wants cake? Are you communicating with it through code embedded in multiple punctuation marks? -gasp- YOU'RE A SPY!!! You're working for THEM!
...
Oh, and if I'm wrong about the spy thing, I blame my subconscious for creating the whole conspiracy theory in the first place.

Anyway, Jane said: Would you like some cloth-and-plastic roses to commemorate the fallen? They're free, even the black and Anti-Lustin ones. We also have other cloth-and-plastic flowers, if you'd like...

They're free,

It should be 'He told himself to enjoy it while he can', rather than 'He told himself to enjoy himself while he can'. Especially as he is within the sight of curious Agents...

Agents began coming in large numbers, ready to commemorate their desceased friends and companions. Since he was the one who suggested that his store should be the site for said commemeoration, it was not unexpected. He made himself ready to welcome them.

Lol. My brain seems to be obsessed with tall ships.

Sorry! Anyway...

Being Genre Savvy, he didn't inquire about the cause of this fortunate turn of events. Best not to catch the Ironic Overpower's attention, he tought. He told himself to enjoy himself while he can, because like all things, it woudn't last for long. He began to wash the counter, humming to himself as he did so.

My computer seems to have become obsessed with cake. I am not sure why. Does anybody have any idea as to the cause of this?

Leto Haven, owner of the PPC General Store;was having an unanticipated good day. The flow of Agents was more tranquil (if it can be called that) than it had been in recent years. He had also managed to scrape out more time for his beloved wife and children.