Subject: Excellent work!
Author:
Posted on: 2014-11-20 13:06:00 UTC

Just one random paragraph break spotted:

Fire rained down on Dale. The building in front of Kaitlyn crashed down, and she yelped, throwing herself back. A spark caught in her beard, spreading rapidly, and she beat at it frantically before

the scene changed, and they were suddenly in the darkness of Bag End, watching Evelynn wake with a start. The fire was gone, but Kaitlyn still ran her fingers through her beard mournfully. "It's never going to be the same again," she said.


Anyway, I enjoyed this just as much as the others, if not more. This new mission format was interesting, and I was cracking up by the end when poor Kaitlyn was speaking in voices like overly-urple similes.

And the Andalite/Animorph mixup reminded me do much of my mom. She could never keep the two straight despite constant 'Animorph are animal morphers' reminders from me. So I found that extremely amusing.

Nice touch, having the Sue's passiveness becoming her downfall.

10/10 would read again.

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