Subject: The Emperor's Plan
Author:
Posted on: 2018-12-15 09:03:00 UTC

Dear Diary,

Today on the way back from C'Tan wrestling (great workout!), I stumbled onto the fact that the Empyrean is inhabited by four malevolent beings of 'godlike' power, along with countless hordes of what I'm going to name 'daemons' (classical reference, diary - look it up!). How did I miss that?! Being basically omni-potent/niscient/awesome, I immediately came up with three plans for dealing with this problem.

Plan Ne-Shomeh

'The Warp is what it eats'. If that's so, maybe I can feed it... something better? Let's run through the four 'gods':

-Subject K is all about war and slaughter. Plan: transition it over to honour and glory. Could create an order of honour-focussed superwarriors to pull this off.

-Subject T is all about change and betrayal. How about art? Could make some kind of order of artists (idea: send them out with the supersoldiers??); alternately, could convert it to focus on bureaucratic infighting.

-Subject N, plague. Need something else that spreads memetically across civilisations - religion? Bit of a blow to rationalism, but if it works...

-Subject S loves murderous excess. How about switching it to simple rich decadence? Could create a feudal, strongly heirarchical society for that.

Plan pH.Obos

Fighting is good, right? But these 'gods' are all squirrelled away in the Warp, not really available for wrestling. I'm sure if they or their daemons came out more, they'd be a cinch to kill.

So how about a Trojan Horse scenario? Send in some soldiers (maybe those superwarriors from last plan?) to convert to their side and change them from within. Rather than hiding inside, get them going on crusades out into the material world, where they can be fought.

Ultimate goal: bring the four entities out in person. Might need some sort of host bodies? Perhaps some kind of super-superwarrior?

Plan Huine's Oron

The Fall of the Eldar shows that it's possible to make a new 'god' in the warp. What if the new one was a God of... Order?! Would need to dedicate an entire galaxy-spanning society to authoritarianism, but eventually would build up enough believe in me Subject E to transform him into something that can impose rules and commands on the population of the Warp.

~

Problems with these plans: they're all going to take a while, call it ten millennia or so, and they're going to make for a rubbish galaxy while they're ongoing. What if the Eldar decide to try and 'improve' situation for humanity (stranger things have happened!)? For safety's sake, will probably need to wipe out all Xenos races along the way.

Hmm... and I will have those handy superwarriors to work with...

~The Emperor of Mankind

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