Oh, I've a solution for that.

Subject: Oh, I've a solution for that.
Author: Granz the Ice Cream Monarch
Posted on: 2019-07-19 00:36:00 UTC

All you have to do is have somebody go to Fate and find the First Hassan, maybe contrive a way to contract with him so he can stick around for However Long, and because his Noble Phantasm can kill even the immortal, you've got your way out if you ever need it. ... On an unrelated note, assuming we could get an infinite wellspring of the immortality stuff, we could theoretically attempt to combat entropy via bleeding a lot.

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Suppose you found a portal thingy by Tomash on 2019-07-18 03:59:00 UTC Reply

However, it's one of the restricted portal thingys - one portal to anywhere in the multiverse and, when (if) you activate it again, a trip back.

Where would you go, what might you get up to, and how long would you hang around?

(I haven't fully made up my mind, because picking is hard, but I'm at least considering swinging by the Culture - if nothing else, they've got ridiculous medical tech and it'd probably be a fun time.)

- Tomash

Gallifrey by Aegis on 2019-07-24 22:11:00 UTC Reply

I know Ix mentioned it a while back, and the idea of immortality sounds great and all, but thinking on this more and more I come to realize that any other option I think of is all subject to "Can I use that to get to the Whoniverse?"

I just... If I could find some way to just work on a TARDIS or-- dare I think it, badfic-y as it sounds-- use some kind of weird Time Lord version of CRISPR tech to let me pilot a TARDIS? Man, I'd give anything.
As far into the queer posthuman self-replicating future... by Delta Juliette on 2019-07-21 19:30:00 UTC Reply

...I mean, surprise.

I would find me a nice queer posthuman future, stay long enough to recover from capitalism and learn how to bootstrap the future, and then bring it (and an awesome post-human body or three) back with me to start here.

Which sense of self-replicating? by Tomash on 2019-07-21 19:37:00 UTC Reply

Self-replicating in that you can bring it back with you and replicate it, or in that you can self-replicate?

... probably both. Both sounds good.

- Tomash

Piggybacking on doctorlitÂ’s idea: by Iximaz on 2019-07-21 00:15:00 UTC Reply

I’ll portal to the DC universe, 50,000 BC, and soak up some of that meteorite radiation that Vandal Savage was exposed to. Hello immortality, enhanced healing and durability, increased intellect, and superhuman strength, speed, and endurance.

Can I come along? by Granz the Ice Cream Monarch on 2019-07-21 01:05:00 UTC Reply

If so, I will gladly share my portal to wherever I decide to go. ... Granted, I'll share anyways, but that sounds like a pretty sweet deal, so if I can get in on it without spending my portal I'd love to.

Heck yeah, weÂ’ll make a holiday of it! (nm) by Iximaz on 2019-07-21 01:43:00 UTC Reply

You know, at this point... by Granz the Ice Cream Monarch on 2019-07-21 04:42:00 UTC Reply

I'm thinking there needs to be a sub-thread or something in here about how, exactly, we would use our portals if the each member of the PPC got access to one and any number of us could use any given portal, since it's very different from the calculations one runs when deciding on a single journey for oneself.

Different calculations, indeed. by Neshomeh on 2019-07-21 05:28:00 UTC Reply

See, my first thought here is that hS and I would obviously be sharing our portals, since I'd also love to see Middle-earth and I know hS would also love to see Pern... but both of our plans involved digging in and staying in one place long enough to learn a bunch of complex stuff. So maybe we have to tag along for the immortality trip first. Then it's not a problem. ^_^

Also, is anyone planning on visiting the Potterverse yet? Because that should be on the itinerary.

~Neshomeh

The PPC inter-universe tour sounds fun! by Tomash on 2019-07-21 06:55:00 UTC Reply

I'm in!

Also, where do we start? London? Chicago? Seattle? Somewhere in Oheo?

- Tomash

Danny the Street! by Larfen J. Stocke, esq. on 2019-07-20 13:19:00 UTC Reply

or any of his varying versions, Dannyland, Danny the Planet (not the ones where he's damaged and everyone's like dead, though).

He's a sentient travelling crossdressing street (he's covered in masculine stores selling guns and sports and such, but decorated in frills and so on) who's just, an absolute top bloke. He accepts in various outcasts and such and basically everyone is really nice, including of course Danny himself.

I just want everyone to be nice to me, man. Including the urban infrastructure.

That's a cool concept by Tomash on 2019-07-20 18:01:00 UTC Reply

You planning to write more about this guy?

Whoops, should've mentioned by Larfen J. Stocke, esq. on 2019-07-20 22:23:00 UTC Reply

I certainly wish I could've come up with Danny the Street, but he's from DC, mostly sticking around stories involving the Doom Patrol and the Teen Titans once I think.

But you know I guess I could write more about him anyway. That's part of the point of this community.

Field trip! by OpinionedAngel on 2019-07-19 15:44:00 UTC Reply

I would love to go to Jurassic World (before everyone went bad, obviously). Seeing real live dinosaurs has been a dream of mine since I was little.
Lyra's world from His Dark Materials by Snowblaze on 2019-07-19 14:01:00 UTC Reply

I'd stay a couple of weeks - long enough to get my own dæmon!

Daemons can be a thing in this universe by Tomash on 2019-07-20 06:13:00 UTC Reply

I should know, I've gotten to know mine.

Ok, now that I've done the clickbait, I should probably explain what I'm on about. (The below is all caveated with an "in my experience")

Basically, you can use the concept of daemons as a useful (and fun) brain thing. The overall idea (or at least how I think of it) is you personify the part of/voice in your head that's responsible for more rational perspectives on things, sudden insights, and so on as your daemon.

The advantages here are that mentally talking to your daemon becomes a good way to get a more detached reading on situations, start pulling yourself out of thought loops, and getting reminded you should do the thing. It's also just neat because you can have richer conversations with yourself (which make for good distractions on top of being fun).

Initially to the thing, you intentionally think at the daemon-y bit of yourself and notice what it thinks back. You then want to ask for a name, and might be able to picture a form of some sort (though that second part might take a bit). Eventually, you might start imagining your daemon being present beside you some of the time or things like that if you want to do that.

Since I might've not explained this too coherently, here's the very 90s website I got linked to when I was told aobut this stuff. You can probably ignore all the parts about how daemon forms are meaningful or whatever (I very much did), but it gives some good introductions to the concept.

Anyhow, I'm willing to take questions (or ask them of Ariel, my daemon)

- Tomash

I will definitely be trying this out! :D by Snowblaze on 2019-07-20 12:55:00 UTC Reply

(I mean, I'd still want to get myself a physical daemon if I could, but a mental one sounds fun as well!)

I hope this works out well for you too! (nm) by Tomash on 2019-07-20 21:20:00 UTC Reply

Elite Dangerous by Crazy Minh on 2019-07-19 06:56:00 UTC Reply

Go there, get a pilot's license, buy a ship, and set off among the stars. God I miss playing that game. I got a month's worth of one of the absolute best games I've ever had the pleasure of playing...and then they dropped Mac support. I loved that game, and I would have kept playing for sure. Problem is that I can't transfer my progress to a console version, and I'm kinda strapped for cash at the moment to get a PC. Well, another one, since my old one burned with my apartment.

Space definitely sounds like a good time by Tomash on 2019-07-19 18:32:00 UTC Reply

Sorry to hear about your apartment, though.

Hopefully there's some insurance that'll come through eventually?

The fire was two years ago or something like that. by Crazy Minh on 2019-07-20 07:23:00 UTC Reply

See above. I did sort out the insurance, but I'm still trying to save enough to buy the components for a proper desktop. I could probably afford a mid-end laptop (of the non-gaming variety), but my Macbook works perfectly fine for now, and last time I purchased a full desktop, stuff happened and I'm without one again. I can tell you that 'stuff' involved me losing yet another gaming PC.

I think you can see my luck isn't really all that good. Things keep happening, and have done so for the last three or so years.

Whatever world Super Smash Bros. takes place in. by SkarmorySilver on 2019-07-18 21:22:00 UTC Reply

I mean, come on, it's the crossroads of a number of my all-time favorite franchises! I'd get to meet a lot of my Nintendo heroes in person and it'd be wonderful, at least until I start to miss home of course. Sure, I might end up becoming a spirit thanks to Galeem, but if it means I can be equipped to Pit and help him against the World of Light, I'll take my chances. :D

Honorable mentions include popping into the world of The Incredibles for a week, if only for a chance to interact with Violet without my own messed-up author desires warping her OOC, and visiting Jurassic World, though I'd rather not stick around that one for long because as much as I love dinosaurs and such, I'd probably die like anyone else would once the inevitable breakout happens. :P

Seriously, this is a wonderful idea, and I hope you don't mind me asking this same question to other online communities I'm in! It'd be fascinating to see which worlds the people I know would want to be in, if only for a day. :)

Heh heh heh... by Neo Skater on 2019-07-19 03:40:00 UTC Reply

SkarmorySilver
Ace Rank
Sword Primary
Stats: Offense is higher than Defense, but both are decent.
Skill: Sword Attack UP

Main Puppet Fighter: Metal Ridley

Special Rules:
- The enemy is metal
- The enemy starts the battle with a Killing Edge
- The enemy's melee weapon attacks are stronger

I approve! by SkarmorySilver on 2019-07-20 06:23:00 UTC Reply

I'd have made Defense higher than Offense rather than the reverse, though. Just sayin'. Metal Ridley as the fighter choice is genius, though!

Steal away! (nm) by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:31:00 UTC Reply

Oh, gosh. by Neshomeh on 2019-07-18 20:02:00 UTC Reply

I think I'd have to go to Pern. Post-Thread, if you please. Not just because Thread is dangerous, but because I'm curious to see how the world is getting on after a few generations or so after AIVAS.

I might try to join the Harper Hall (in whatever form it evolves into), I might be able to swing a dragon-ride pretty easily if some of them are career couriers now, and I would definitely stay however long it would take to Impress a fire-lizard. {= D

... Man, the more I think about it, the more I want to see and do and learn. This is a great idea. ^_^

~Neshomeh

So once (if) you're back... by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:30:00 UTC Reply

... you'll be a musician with a fresh new style and a shockingly realistic "pet fire-lizard"?

- Tomash

Fresh old style, maybe. {= ) by Neshomeh on 2019-07-20 15:34:00 UTC Reply

I just want to finally learn to play guitar. Oh, and recorder. Maybe harp, too, if I can push my manual coordination that far. Assuming the requirements across multiple musical disciplines are still the same, I dunno if my hands are good enough to do everything I'd need them to do to make journeyman... but at least I know I can sing in key and pick up new music quickly, even if my breath control has always been iffy. And I'd be good at anything that needs doing in an archival capacity. And I do have one good song lyric to my credit, and I've dabbled in noting down little bits of music that come into my head in dreams. If I can make journeyman with that as a starting point, I'll be pretty proud of myself. ^_^

~Neshomeh

The Hanger Lane Gyratory System. (nm) by Scapegrace on 2019-07-18 17:01:00 UTC Reply

The Stairfoot Barnsley Dutch Turbo Roundabout (nm) by Scapegrace on 2019-07-18 17:02:00 UTC Reply

The Swindon Magic Roundabout (nm) by Scapegrace on 2019-07-18 17:03:00 UTC Reply

The Churchbridge Modified Magic Gyrator (nm) by Scapegrace on 2019-07-18 17:05:00 UTC Reply

I have not made any of these up. (nm) by Scapegrace on 2019-07-18 17:05:00 UTC Reply

I'm pretty sure you can just drive to these places? by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:05:00 UTC Reply

Why waste a portal shot?

Well, for starters, I don't drive. =] by Scapegrace on 2019-07-18 23:51:00 UTC Reply

And I don't think anyone I know who does drive is going to cart me up the length and breadth of Britain's road network so I can geek out about the silly names in this sceptred isle's civic architecture.

But that's not the real reason. It's more that... well, you never knew they were there until I told you, right? There's no Earthly reason you would. Hell, I only know about the Swindon Magic Roundabout because it features so heavily in the British popular consciousness as an example of something universally loathed. There's so much I don't know, so much that there is to find out in just one island on one planet in one universe. I could go to Hogwarts or the deck of the Galactica or the dark side of the Moon or anywhere, really... but why do I have to go somewhere far away or made up to enjoy a trip?

Can't the Stairfoot Barnsley Six-Lane Dutch Turbo Roundabout be enough for someone as demonstrably boring and useless as me?

I see your points by Tomash on 2019-07-19 00:56:00 UTC Reply

Using a portal thingy to explore something interesting around here you wouldn't usually be able to see makes a lot of sense.

(I do, however, take issue with the idea that you're boring or useless.)

- Tomash

Portal! by Cicada on 2019-07-18 16:45:00 UTC Reply

Assuming you have the requisite magic and such, I'm heading to Garth Nix's Old Kingdom. Learn Charter Magic and swordfighting, possibly become a sworn sword-hand of either Sabriel or Lirael, defend the world against Free Magic and the Dead! And even if I died, I'd be able to find out what lay beyond Death and the starry sky, which I've wanted to know ever since I learned about it in Abhorsen.
Then when I come home, I can impress everyone with my wicked swordfighting skills. There's no quicker way to learn than life-or-death, amiright?
And if I could, I'd bring my best friend. I'd love to go on an adventure with her, especially since she introduced me to those books.

Your plan sounds dangerous, but fun by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:27:00 UTC Reply

Mostly because wicked swordfighting, let alone messing around with Death, leaves you at a pretty good risk of dying.

And if you bring your friend ... try not to get separated.

Re: Your plan sounds dangerous, but fun by Cicada on 2019-07-19 02:12:00 UTC Reply

Oh yeah for sure, like chain our wrists together levels of not getting separated. But I've always had a problem with risking my well-being to try and Do The Right Thing, and helping keep the Dead down seems like a pretty good cause.

I suppose one of the important questions... by Granz the Ice Cream Monarch on 2019-07-18 16:12:00 UTC Reply

... is how you interact with the existing systems. Can you be assumed to have all the requisite paperwork and have it filed and such so that you, for example, are treated essentially as a recent, legal arrival in the area? Do you speak the language? If the setting is magical, do you possess such magic? For example, could you go into the Fate universe and participate in a Holy Grail War? If so, will your magic return with you? What financial resources do you have access to when you visit this other plane of existence? What influence can you wield? Do you, by visiting, gain knowledge of cultural norms enough that you can at least seem like somebody who comes from the same planet, even if you must have been hiding under a rock for most of your life?

Hey, we don't need realism around here! :P by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:10:00 UTC Reply

This is a fun excuse to fantasize about wandering off to places where all the tricky complexities involved in actually doing so are massively handwaved by plotholes!

More seriously, those are good questions, and you're welcome to answer them as you see fit. (For example, if you tossed in a language and cultural barrier, which would probably be an issue realistically, you'd have an interesting contact story like that one "girl falls into Middle Earth" goodfic whose name I can't remember at the moment.)

- Tomash

There is exactly one correct answer. by doctorlit on 2019-07-18 13:27:00 UTC Reply
1. Portal to the river from Tuck Everlasting.
  
  2. Spend roughly five seconds drinking from said river.
  
  3. Return home.
  
  4. Stories everlasting, zookeeper everlasting, doctorlit everlasting. Forever.
  
  —doctorlit is still supremely obsessed with living forever, if that wasn't clear

Immortality by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:14:00 UTC Reply

This is also why I was considering the Culture. They've got the medical tech for arbitrarily long life (and, while you're there, the ability to keep mind-state backups so you don't have to worry too much about your body getting into a bad state).

On the more general point, if I were picking up immortality (of the nice, no aging etc. sort), I'd want "arbitrarily long" and not "forever" Because it's at least possible that, at some point, I might want to be done with life, and that's an option worth keeping on the table for once I'm past 500 or so.

- Tomash

The Tuck Everlasting water . . . by doctorlit on 2019-07-19 13:32:00 UTC Reply

. . . prevents all wounds immediately as they happen. Can't find the particular passage at the moment; it's literally been decades since I read TE for school.

Anyway, "forever" is just fine with me. There's so much to do in the world, and such an endless supply of stories to feed on, I can't bear the thought that I'll be obligated to stop at any point. Hence my obsession with the topic.

—doctorlit everlasting
Oh, I've a solution for that. by Granz the Ice Cream Monarch on 2019-07-19 00:36:00 UTC Reply

All you have to do is have somebody go to Fate and find the First Hassan, maybe contrive a way to contract with him so he can stick around for However Long, and because his Noble Phantasm can kill even the immortal, you've got your way out if you ever need it. ... On an unrelated note, assuming we could get an infinite wellspring of the immortality stuff, we could theoretically attempt to combat entropy via bleeding a lot.

I was gonna say Gallifrey, but can I come with you? (nm) by Iximaz on 2019-07-18 15:21:00 UTC Reply

Aaaw yeeaah PPC everlasting! (nm) by doctorlit on 2019-07-18 20:56:00 UTC Reply

While I like the immortality plan... by Granz the Ice Cream Monarch on 2019-07-18 22:21:00 UTC Reply

... Does everyone who wants in have to go? Couldn't one person go and just find a way to bring the entire river back, or at least a truly massive container?

I have often wondered . . . by doctorlit on 2019-07-19 13:19:00 UTC Reply

. . . what minimum amount of water is required to gain the immortality. Would a drop do it? A deep breath of the water vapor evaporating over the stream? Because then keeping a small amount frozen could last a ridiculously long time, for a ridiculously large number of friends.

—doctorlit recognizes that the physical properties of the water aren't the point of the story (the point being "You shouldn't want immortality"), but doctorlit still wants immortality

Not to mention, it's a finite resource. by Iximaz on 2019-07-19 16:22:00 UTC Reply

In the book, the characters had to keep drinking the magic water every ten years or else they'd wither away to nothing and die.

Eaueauaueuargh noooooo by doctorlit on 2019-07-20 13:01:00 UTC Reply

nooooo how can you do this to me? I can't believe I forgot this detail. This canon has been my go-to immortality dream for decades!

What's the back-up plan? Indiana Jones-verse Holy Grail? That knight was super-old, but in pretty good shape for being in his ~700s. Plus, who's to say he wasn't already elderly before he drank from the Grail? Maybe the other knights were like, "Fred's on his way out soon, let's have him become the immortal Grail guard. Fred's a good guy!"

—doctorlit, co-opting religious artifacts for his personal benefit

Pretty sure he was stuck in the cave. by Iximaz on 2019-07-20 14:19:00 UTC Reply

The grail wouldn’t make you permanently immortal, just keep you alive for the time being (see: Indy’s dad, who was healed with it, but he’s definitely not immortal as we see in the unmentionable fourth movie). But you can’t take the grail across the seal in the cave, because that caused the cave to collapse and the grail to lose its magic.

If I might suggest something, the Time Lords have ways of extending even human lifespans—Leela was made essentially ageless so she could marry Andred. So with that in mind, I think that’s where I’ll head. (Gasp, shock, Iximaz wants to visit Gallifrey after all!)

It would be easier to get your hands on a Mire chip and implant that, and it would keep you alive and young to the end of the universe, but you’d also be stuck with a limited human memory and you’d eventually forget even your own name. That sounds significantly less fun.

Someone, somewhere... by Huinesoron on 2019-07-20 14:32:00 UTC Reply

... must have put together a chart of options for immortality. Probably with ratings out of 10.

Middle-earth is kind of useless for this; your options are 'be Tuor' or 'be a cursed, wrung-out shade to one degree or another'.

The Potterverse is a bit better; I forget how the Philosopher's Stone works, but I'm sure Flamel was like 700 years old. Don't take the Horcrux approach, though - it doesn't end well.

Discworld? ... to be honest the closest I can think of is being abducted by Elves. You get to travel forward in time, but don't actually get any extra subjective time. (Alternately, once you die you can hang out in one of many afterlives... not sure that counts, though.) (Oh, or there's always vampirism...)

hS

Hmmm... by Granz the Ice Cream Monarch on 2019-07-20 19:16:00 UTC Reply

Well, while examples of life after a Servant's departure are relatively limited, especially as three of the examples I'm aware of relate to King Arthur, it's possible that if a Servant has something that lets them bestow immortality, their master will continue to possess it even if the Servant dies. So, for example, I believe that Medea has elixirs that grant a form of immortality, and Paracelsus von Hohenheim can create Philosopher's Stones that grant a form of immortality, so you have options, although most, if not all, will be Casters. Alternatively, you could really put some effort into winning that Grail War in the name of eternal life - if you wanted, you could probably wish for immortality, and as long as you weren't an idiot about it, I think it's within the Grail's power to grant that.
Peter and the Starcatchers, perhaps? by Iximaz on 2019-07-20 16:12:00 UTC Reply

If you handle starstuff for too long, you’ll get some sort of permanent superpower, and apparently immortality and flight is the most common combo. If you concentrate, you can manipulate it to grant you other abilities as well.

Only downside is there’s a chance you could die if you handle the raw stuff for too long.
You could become a sparklepire. by Neshomeh on 2019-07-20 15:17:00 UTC Reply

There's virtually no downside to this if you don't mind subsisting exclusively on pig blood for the rest of forever. {= )

~Neshomeh

I have a downside. by Iximaz on 2019-07-20 16:10:00 UTC Reply

Even after the sparklepires have fed, their throats still feel like they’re on fire. It’s muted compared to when they’re hungry, but a never-ending sore throat sounds like a nightmare to me. Sore throats are the worst and I turn into a huge whiny baby when I’m sick with one.

I asked Kaitlyn this... by Huinesoron on 2019-07-18 11:04:00 UTC Reply

... and she immediately said 'bank vault'. I don't think she's planning on staying long. ^~

For myself, I would head to Nargothrond, the city that stood at the pinnacle of Noldorin culture in Middle-earth. I'd go sometime between the arrival of Men in Beleriand in 311, and the Dagor Bragollach in 455 (because no-one wants to hang around for the war). I'd stick around for long enough to learn conversational Sindarin; not sure how long that would be.

As for what I'd do... I'd explore. I'd talk. I'd find out all the things that Tolkien never recorded. I'd spend a lot of time in the library. ^^ I'd sneak in a camera and get pictures of all the art.

(I would consider visiting Valinor in the time of the Trees, too, except I'm pretty sure that would be harrowingly bad for a mortal body. Alas.)

hS

"Bank vault" is clever by Tomash on 2019-07-18 23:23:00 UTC Reply

And that definitely sounds like you'd have a good time.

I'm imagining you'd publish a thick multi-volume encyclopedia once you got back.

Re: Suppose you found a portal thingy by Jacob175 on 2019-07-18 04:15:00 UTC Reply

I'd have to say the Mushroom Kingdom, for at least a month. Take in all the sights, ride a Yoshi, partake in a Mario Party, do a little kart racing, try and figure out how the desert world is usually so close to the ice world and such.