Subject: Agh, Hagrid, my man . . .
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Posted on: 2022-11-28 04:17:01 UTC

I appreciate his excellent, calm bedside manner with animals, but he has a penchant for putting himself in unsafe situations, so I just can't give him the Zookeeper Seal of Approval™. Alas!

I was initially amused by McGonagall's false assumption of what Harry and Hermione were doing in the Astronomy Tower, because it made for such an easy out to avoid revealing Hagrid's dragon, and because the weird Pureblood enthusiasts basically set the alibi up themselves. But then, it dawned on me: the fact that this culture places so much emphasis on underage kids "courting" each other, that even McGonagall thinks two eleven-year-olds sneaking out in the middle of the night for a make-out session is a perfectly plausible thing to happen is pretty (please insert several lines of internal screaming, I'm too tired to type it all out). And then the rest of the school has the same reaction, and Lavender brings up the whole Maiden's Kiss thing and assumes Harry and Hermione are definitely getting married in the future based on eleven-year-old feelings, and (more screaming here please). It's like this entire society are all mutually roleplaying that they're in a soulmate AU, without any fanfic writer actually writing it onto them!

Okay, Professor Greengrass is way more complex than I gave her credit for last chapter. Maybe she really is in love with Quirrell! Either way, and in spite of how cruel and authoritarian she is, I hope she does manage to get her hands on some Un-ceinte and escape from Gaunt, or whoever her actual Bond person is. No one deserves to be tortured like that . . . It was interesting to see that even Malfoy, as brainwashed into the bonding system as he is, was visibly sickened by Greengrass's treatment as well. Whether Gaunt or not, her partner is some real trash, even by this society's standards!

I hate to nitpick this, because it's an 11-out-of-10 joke, but you've got the lyrics reversed: it's ♪Istanbul, not Constantinople♪

—doctorlit had kind of forgotten what a disastrous concept the House Points system is from canon, and how easily it lends itself to students bullying their classmates in retaliation for losing points

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