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Now I have to wonder what would happen if this actually happened in canon - since in the Feline Wizards books, the idea is at least discussed a couple of times, along with the DAWN project at the New York Public Library (and the acronym CATNYP also comes up, though I forget what exactly it stands for...).

But yes, this sounds great! I like how making Earth astahfrith ends up a priority (since, in my unwritten crossover fic... that's also what I came up with. >.> Replacing some plot twists that may or may not have adhered to the Oath, too).

Have to wonder how (or if!) it would handle spam, though.

He'd changed out of his usual things into a black silk tunic and boots that weren't scuffed and dusty, and his hair was braided even more elaborately than usual. He spotted Jacques at one of the tables and waved, but decided to sit elsewhere. He and Jacques had seen each other plenty of times in the past; no need to hog his favorite partner at a speed dating event.

He took a seat and looked around interestedly.

((As for how my characters would react to Jacques:

The Aviator would flirt back with heavy sarcasm Zeb would be like "Oh, are we on another date? :D" Charlotte and Ix: Well, you know, Dax flirts back Lorson sits there stony-faced Farilan laughs derisively Alex just grins And Olivine gives him a puzzled look and goes "Hang on, are you flirting, Squishy?"

I know it's not a fire lizard, but this little smasher is Draco volans, a species of gliding lizard from Southeast Asia.

pls accept.

=]

To a first approximation, I think we'd see similar events to those of High Wizardry. The internet wouldn't have a planet of computronium to build stuff out of, but it would have access to all our networked machines. That gives it control over most modern cars, most satellites, a lot of factories... plus the entire global communications network, obviously.

I have to think Wizternet wouldn't much like what it sees. The Oath tells it to 'guard growth, ease pain', and protect life - but humanity as a whole is terrible at those things. And now the network which controls everything knows that...

Okay, so. What's its first priority? Let's check the leading causes of death in the world.

#1 through 7 are all diseases of various kinds. Most of them are treatable. Wizternet controls the factories for the treatments, but doesn't really have a way to get the treatments where they need to be. Wizardry? A hundred thousand tiny 'move this thing to that car' spells could go a long way here. It also has our medical records, so it can deliver boxes of medicines to everyone who needs them, free of charge.

Outside the developed world, things are a bit more tricky. Wizternet's observation is much patchier, and it doesn't have the resources available. On the other hand, the top causes of death are respiratory infections and diarrhoeal diseases, which are extremely treatable, since they mostly go away with food and water. So leave the medicines (for now) and divert all that food being shipped everywhere to where it's needed. This will also deal with malnutrition, and thus guard growth.

Moving on, the 8th cause of death is road injury... and Wizternet controls the most recentcars. They're being used horribly inefficiently - if people only had a car when they needed it, we could probably get by with a tenth of the number. So here's the plan:

-On every networked printer worldwide, print out simple instructions for how to call for a car. (Basically 'speak in any microphone'.)

-Take control of the networked cars. Use them to disable the non-networked ones. This may involve a lot of crashing into parked vehicles, though anything in a wirelessly-controlled garage can just be locked in.

-Run the networked cars as massive single-player Uber.

The rest of the top 10 is diseases, but there's also a whole bunch of shooting going on... plus a whole bunch of networked drones. Since this is direct, purposeless death and maiming, a huge violation of the Oath, Wizternet gets to take control of the drones and use them to steal or smash every weapon it finds. (Hunting weapons are not excepted - it doesn't say 'human life'...) This may involve injuring their wielders, if they're currently in active use - that's a shame, but within the limits of the Oath.

So: growth guarded, life protected. What are its next priorities?

-Self-protection. It needs to be able to keep itself online. It also needs more mobility, so it starts a rapid evolutionary robotics program across any suitable factories. It should only take a few days to come up with a primitive mobile.

-Bring wizardry safely into the open. Wizternet knows about Earth's other wizards, and also knows that quality of life is much better on planets where they operate openly. Human wizards can't make that change without causing widespread upheaval - but Wizternet is already doing that, and is ideally situated to keep a lid on things until it passes.

-Direct quality of life improvement. At this point Wizternet is going to run into a huge problem: its views of what humans (and indeed organics) like are coloured by what's uploaded to it, and a whole bunch of that is X-rated...

hS

(I’m new in this job and don’t know what to do.)

Like Zingenmir, I see a lot of potential and mostly like what I read. But I have an issue with Colonel Bradbury’s origin.

World One is just like Real Life, except that the PPC exists as a transdimensional organization. Worlds numbered 2 or higher are word worlds defined by their respective canon. World One and a Half (or 1.5) is just like World One except that Eusabius and Florestan somehow survived Robert Schumann’s death and became actual persons.

World 1.963 is just like World One except that some/many/most conspiracy theories are true (some must still be untrue, because otherwise certain aspects of this world would contradict each other). Minor issue: That’s probably what you mean, and I would buy it if I could find Archuelta Mesa on a map. Actually, the difference appears to be that in World 1.963, Archuelta Mesa and Dulce base exist, while the conspiracy theory about an alien base under Archuleta Mesa is still untrue. If this isn’t intentional, a typo in such a crucial point of your Draconian agent’s back story doesn’t bode well.

But in which way would World 1.567 repeating be different from World One? We can’t tell, because Bradbury, using the medical and cybernetic science of the 2050s, apparently comes from the future and we don’t know the future of World One. Thus, tacking an irrational number on his world of origin doesn’t work for me; he must be from some speculative work, even if it is unpublished original fiction.

Also, I don’t quite understand why Allen I. Nirvana immediately wants to recruit Colonel Bradbury. He says that he was working on something unrelated, so he is apparently aware that Bradbury is not a character of the fic Nirwana is investigating. Shouldn’t Nirwana ask some questions similar to what Bradbury asks him? Who are you? Where do you come from? What are you doing here? How did you get here? There is no implication that Nirwana watched Bradbury for some time and already found out some of the answers without asking. At least he figures that Bradbury can’t just leave and go home on his own, but did Bradbury show any signs of actually fitting into the PPC or not actually wanting to go home, or is the PPC so desperate for new recruits?

I like that Rasputin Gibbs is just sentenced to conscription into the PPC for making a nuisance and vigilante Sue killing. He obviously was under observation for some time, probably by several assassins who reported that he killed their Sue’s before they could get to them. What I don’t like so much is that it is a single paragraph tacked onto a different story. "We see both agents recruited" works better if both agents are recruited at the same time in the same place rather than in two unrelated chapters of a story that’s too short to have chapters. Perhaps you should have gone with the other option – "One agent tells the other how they were recruited" – where Gibbs could still chip in with some lines about his recruitment. But telling a story in dialogue may just not be your thing and I don’t nudge you to do that. Actually, my complaint here is more that it sets a bad example than that we don’t see enough of your second agent.

HG

Because you don't just require cheers on the big day itself. Have a black-hole chocolate cake, with optional red berries coating.

Also, quick question: In the interest of keeping the Pern flavor here, how would you like some shooter where you dispatch Threads, except there's... that bill written all over them?

"...So anyways, that's why systemd is the worst."

"Tom," said Talia, rolling her eyes, "you're acting like I don't know all of this already. Or like he cares."

"I don't", Dagger was quick to opine. "In case you thought I did." The surly Dragonborn trailed slightly, as if trying to distance himself.

"Fiiine... I'll just leave my fascinating technical trivia by the wayside, then." Tom sighed. "With my winning personality, I'm sure people will be throwing themselves at me..."

Talia grinned. "Oh, don't worry so much. I'm sure someone will want to hang with an absolute doofus."

"Well, I'm not that bad." Tom frowned. "No, my real question is, what the hell is Dagger doing here?"

"That's easy," said Dagger. "Free food. I got recruited out of college. Never broke the habit of not turning down a free meal."

((Yes, everyone but Thoth. I wanted to give them all a bit of time to shine, because he's the one who gets all the focus usually. :-(.

Anyways, responses to flirting:

Thoth - Depending on the mood, explain he's not interested, brush it off (possibly with a side of condescention), or find some way to mess with whoever's throwing it at him.

Tom - Seeing as we're talking about a guy, he's be horrifyingly embarrassed, awkward, and uncomfortable.

Talia - Go along with it. Possibly with some snark on the side. Unlikely to take it any further than that.

Dagger - Most likely, outright hostility, sarcasm, and general bitterness (contrast his usual apathetic grumpiness—wait, you haven't seen enough of him to do that yet). Even if he finds the guy attractive. Yes, he is into guys. Is this surprising? :-P))

I hope you'll have a good day, and some good food.

It seems like I'm good at warm fuzzies. Somehow. I dunno how.

I have a boring Nord because I'm boring. He was half-naked once (I installed SoS for the lulz. The removed it once the humor wore off). Now he is not.

Thing is, I've never played Skyrim before... like, a few months ago. I did play Daggerfall before. That is not an experience I would recommend.

Iloilo, the fabled "brown-out capital of the Philippines," has finally gotten 24-hour electricity thanks to new solar farms.

For both platonic and non-platonic intent, despite the name. All welcome (regardless of Permission status). Of my characters, Jacques Bonnefoy (who kind of spawned this whole thing) is quite available to talk to, by anyone who wishes to show up.

This RP is happening over at the T-Board! The link is here. Come check it out! A more complete explanation of both the RP setting and how it came about is there as well.

And one more thing: I'm interested in collecting, for the Badfic Games, descriptions of how agents would react to being flirted with by a wandering Jacques. A little more detail on that is on T-Board as well. If you'd like to potentially see your agents show up in a badfic to be flirted with, leave me a post! Unsuccessful reactions definitely welcome as well! My goal here is to get a sampling of HQ (and probably amuse us all with the responses in the process).

~Z

Because no, I couldn't think up a better title.

Anyway, onto the prompts for this fornight, in honour of Nesh's birthday post below and Matt Cipher's Ficlet Response (that I loved), the two prompts for this one are:

Prompt 1: It's your character's birthday.

Prompt 2: One of your characters is trying to cook something.

Hope you have fun with these.

Novastorme

He was dressed far more casually than usual, in dark jeans and a deep purple t-shirt of a soft fabric that clung pleasantly. His favored black military jacket was draped over the back of his chair.

He was glad this event was happening, even if not too many people had shown up yet. It felt nice, having a break from missions which was specifically set aside to talk to people. Who knew how many strangers would show up? He'd been an agent for five years, but that (unfortunately) didn't mean he'd managed to meet the whole of HQ's population. For one thing, HQ was big; for another, not everyone frequented the same places, or any places outside their own RCs. Moreover, new people were coming in all the time...

This was going to be fun. He could already tell. Who knew how many friends (and 'friends') he'd manage to make here? And he could get to know people he already knew a bit better--he could see a few of them in the room...

Yes, this was definitely going to be fun.

Because apparently watching Jacques Bonnefoy flirt with people in RP format is entertaining enough to spawn this!

Essentially: some mad brave soul has set up a speed-dating event in HQ. No, it was not Jacques, what are these lies. Everyone is welcome, whether they've wandered in for the free food and drinks or are actually looking to meet people (whether for platonic or non-platonic purposes. Hey, you can make friends in the strangest of places!)

At one of the tables is one Jacques Bonnefoy, ESAS. Being a former Jack Harkness character replacement, he's quite used to getting attention--and he loves it. He's here to make as many friends, acquaintances, and everything in between as possible, and will talk to absolutely anyone who cares to approach him.

--

Essentially, this started up when, in the middle of a Discord roleplay, I mentioned it would be amusing to write something for the badfic games about Jacques going around and trying to flirt with as many agents as he could find. Then it became 'well, it would be interesting to get lists of how all different agents would react and then write based on that...' which in turn became 'there could be a thread somewhere to get IC lists?' which Thoth then said should be a roleplay thread. So, after a bit of convincing, here we are.

(There was a speed-dating roleplay thread in the past. I have not tracked it down to check exactly how it worked, and am not the one who ran it. If anyone remembers something from it that would make this one run smoother, feel free to mention!)

While this did start because of Jacques and he is mentioned above, he's by no means the only person around! He's just the agent I'm immediately throwing out there, because, let's face it, this is exactly his scene. He will cheerfully flirt and/or make friends with anyone who's open to it.

Please do start many subthreads that have nothing to do with him. Multiple conversations with the same characters are quite fine as well--speed-dating is built for it!

And, as always, Permission is unnecessary for RP participation. All are welcome!

Enjoy, I hope?

~Z

PS: Should you wish to, perhaps, mention how even characters you don't want to actually throw in here would react to being flirted with by Jacques...well, you may see that (perhaps deliberately poorly) fictionalized come the next Badfic Games in September ;) The more amusing the better!

A fire-lizard and a Toothless plush now? Too many dorbs, can't handle. *ded*

Okay, better now!

Funny story: I was poking through my GDrive the other day, went "what the heck is this?", and opened up the copy of the fic we were gonna spork. And remembered that was a thing. ^_^;

"The Lost Blade," it is. Apparently I started making comments on it, but only got through the first few chapters. If you wanna go add your own, I find it helps for figuring out the direction of the story, picking what jokes to include, and deciding where to stop. It's shared with you, but I'll send the link again, since it's been so long. I don't really know how long.

And whenever is fine. I've got other stuff going on and I'm not going anywhere, so no rush.

~Neshomeh

Maybe wait to Wednesday, so it's been a week, if you're worried?

And while I'm at it, have a Night Fury plushie! I'm sure we could all use something to hug in times as troubled as this one. ^^;



(Also, sorry I haven't been able to get us started on our co-write. I've been so busy with so many other things and it may take a while longer for me to get them squared away. I'll see if I can send a starting document once I'm able though and we can start from there, mmmmmmaybe later this week if my schedule permits...?)