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...It's hard to believe he's dead. He just sort of felt like a fact, you know?

He'll live on for many years indeed.

“There are three deaths. The first is when the body ceases to function. The second is when the body is consigned to the grave. The third is that moment, sometime in the future, when your name is spoken for the last time.”

http://abcnews.go.com/International/nobel-prize-winning-scientist-stephen-hawking-dies-76/story?id=53729818

Nobel Prize-winning physicist Stephen Hawking died early Wednesday morning, a family spokesman told ABC News. He was 76.

Hawking, who wrote several influential books including "A Brief History of Time," was diagnosed with motor neurone disease in 1962.

The family did not disclose the cause of death, but said he “died peacefully” at his home in Cambridge, England.

“We are deeply saddened that our beloved father passed away today. He was a great scientist and an extraordinary man whose work and legacy will live on for many years," the family said in a statement.

"His courage and persistence with his brilliance and humor inspired people across the world. He once said, ‘It would not be much of a universe if it wasn’t home to the people you love.’ We will miss him forever,” it added.

He leaves behind a wife, Lucy, and two sons, Robert and Tim.

...but what I put in there was "Can I kiss you?" and "You're so perfect."

Now I'm sort of wishing I'd put in ridiculous things, like "Do you like cheeseburgers?" and "Anteaters are ballerinas."

... Although I've got to ask, can I get a somewhat-official translation of the last few lines? All I'm getting are weird synonyms.

Iximaz rocked back on her heels nervously, pink blushes spreading on her cheeks. "I was just wondering..."

"What is it, Ixi-kun?" Delta Juliette slowly turned around in her aerials hoop, silky purple hair splayed around her like a halo.

Iximaz felt her nose start to bleed and she fell over, feet in the air. "N-nothing, Delta-senpai! I just wanted to tell you your form is perfect! Aaa! It's too perfect! I can't help myself!"

Delta laughed and turned right side up. "Oh, Ixi-kun, you're so kawaii," Delta said, batting her eyelashes. "Watashi wa, anata o aishiteimasu!"

Iximaz sat up, holding her hands over her nose. "Anata ga yaru?"

"Mochiron!" Delta dropped gracefully down from her hoop and approached Iximaz, grabbing her hands. "Kisu shite kuremasu ka?"

Iximaz nodded and leaned in. "Anata wa totemo kanpekidesu," she whispered when they broke apart.

Delta smiled. "I know."

Genderbent Voyd (yes, Dahlia is what I usually call her) always has a purple streak in her hair, by the by.

No construction or anything like that.

I also have absolutely no intention of ever going to college. It is literally a gamble; you're giving them thousands and thousands of dollars in the hopes that you get a good job that can pay well, when the odds are about as good as your average slot machine. I'm not doing something like that if I don't have an absolute certainty that it'll pay off.

This is solidly on-meter (I'm probably using that term right), but more importantly is one of the funniest shipfest stories so far by a country mile.

And yes, a performance of this would be funny as all hell.

It's incredibly fun to see Hamilton filks, I must say. Are you perchance planning any more?

~Z

((The below may be best viewed on a mobile or a narrowed browser window. And it probably works better if you know the song.))

[Neshomeh:]
Listen, let's all calm down.
I'm sure we can talk this out.
Why don't I put on a pot of tea and-
Wait. Why is this conversation in script format?

[Kaitlyn:]
You say

[Neshomeh:]
Oh no.

[Kaitlyn:]
The price of my love's not a price that you're willing to pay.
You cry

[Neshomeh:]
Not singing.

[Kaitlyn:]
In my tea--

[Phobos:]
--which you brewed from the set that I bought for my wife.
Why so sad?

[Neshomeh:]
I bet I'm sadder than her.

[Phobos:]
Shouldn't you be with your husband?--

[Kaitlyn:]
--He's gone on a trip
Yeah, I know that it's bad.
But I find you so hard to resist--

[Phobos:]
--Wait! I've got this…

[Neshomeh:]
Something tells me it's not going to be--

[Phobos:]
Why… not… share?

[Neshomeh:]
What.

[Kaitlyn:]
Ooh, why not?
Yes, I think maybe it's worth a shot.

[Phobos:]
You're quite hot,
So's my wife.

[Kaitlyn:]
So let's keep us both here in your life!

[Phobos:]
E-motions rise--

[Kaitlyn:]
--Bound'ries fall!
Let's just stay together, have a ball

[Phobos:]
And when push
Comes to shove
I'm quite sure we can convince my Neshy--

[Kaitlyn:]
--to accept our mutual love!

[Neshomeh:]
Okay, listen.
This has gone too far.
I was willing to overlook a small amount of shipping,
But all this talk of sharing has gotten me really-

[Kaitlyn:]
You say you're feeling jealous and you want me gone~!

[Neshomeh:]
That's not exactly what-

[Phobos:]
You say you can't stand list'ning to what I want~!

[Neshomeh:]
Stop making me sound unreasonable!

[Phobos:]
No! Don't change the subject!

[Kaitlyn:]
'Cos you're our favourite subject!

[Phobos:]
Our precious, luscious subject!

[Kaitlyn:]
Our flawless, hottest subject!
For ever--

[Phobos:]
--and ever--

[Kaitlyn:]
--and ever and ever and ever…

[Neshomeh:]
Oh, you guys,
Stop this talk
You've said your piece, now walk the walk!
Kaitlyn's hot,
Phobos strong,
Look, you've even got me singing along!
E-motions rise--

[Phobos:]
--Inhibitions fall!

[Neshomeh:]
There's a bedroom just along the hall!

[Kaitlyn:]
And when push--

[Phobos:]
--comes to shove...

[Neshomeh:]
We'll be staying up till midnight…
... and keep singing of our love!

[All three:]
Da da da dat da!
Dat da da da da ya da…

---

^_^ Well, I couldn't let the Shipfest end without at least one NeshBosh fic... even if they don't get any time to themselves in this one.

hS

I've just gone through the Wiki page and added links to everything I can find, including no less than six stories from the very first Shipfest! :D :D :D

If anyone happens to have any shipfics from 2004-2007 that they've saved, by the way, I'd appreciate having them sent my way. I'll try to scrounge up my Odder and Oddest Days, but I'm not even sure I still have them...

hS

I think this is the most in-character I've ever been in the Shipfest. (And no I'm not going to go over previous Shipfests to see. I'm not. I have no time for that, dammit!)

~Neshomeh

Kaitlyn frowned, tapping her pencil on her clipboard. "Do you know what this Shipfest is missing?"

"Leather trousers," Zingenmir said. "It's just not the same without them."

Neshomeh shook her head. "I'm sure I've seen hS wearing them. Or not wearing them, as the case may be."

Twistey raised a hand hesitantly. "Er… is it memes?"

"No," Kaitlyn said, smiling at her, "but feel free to introduce them. I meant-"

"Corsets," Scapegrace muttered from her chair. "I keep trying to fit them in, but I just can't make it work."

Kaitlyn flushed slightly and coughed. "Not what I was thinking of. What we're missing… is femslash."

The others considered this, and then Twistey raised her hand again. "There was that thing with me and Calliope…"

Scapegrace nodded along. "And there's lots of slash-slash. Some of it involving fictional characters."

"Or sandwiches," Zingenmir added. "Or was the sandwich female?"

Neshomeh cleared her throat and adjusted her glasses. "She has a point," she said. "Femslash is a tradition here."

Kaitlyn nodded firmly. "It's where it all started. The very first ships were girl-girl."

"Um." Twistey's hand rose again. "I thought the first ship was you and hS."

Kaitlyn flicked a hand. "Details, sliated."

"Which is a reference to TOS," Neshomeh murmured. "I can probably look up the-"

"Bjam/BiD," Kaitlyn said hurriedly. "Andy/Saphie. Jay/Acacia."

"Kaitlyn/Thalia Weaver?" Neshomeh suggested.

Flushing again, Kaitlyn shook her head. "I don't think that ever… the point is, femslash: we need it."

"I mean, I'm not objecting," Scapegrace said, "but if I can't even manage to get corsets in, how are you going to organise this?"

There was a Pop! of displaced air, and Voyd appeared on the table. "I can help!" he exclaimed as the plotters variously yelped (Kaitlyn), rolled their eyes (Scapegrace), or fell out of their chairs (Twistey).

"Ah, Voyd," Neshomeh said, "we're talking about femslash. With ladies."

"The clue is in the name," Zingenmir put in.

"That's right!" Voyd scrambled to his feet and patted his (her?) chest. "I've been genderbent, see? So I can help!"

Kaitlyn frowned. "Wait, are we talking gender or sex, here?"

"And does it even matter?" Scapegrace asked. "I vote no."

"I can look into the question," Neshomeh suggested. "I've got a survey I can adapt for the purpose."

"Let's… maybe we could stick to people who were female before the shipfest," Zingenmir said. "You know, for the sake of simplicity."

"Aww." Voyd pouted. "Fine. But see if I ever get myself genderbent for you again." With another Pop!, he was gone.

"So if not Voyd," Twistey said after a moment, "who are we going to fem, uh, ship?"

The others looked at each other. Then, one by one, they turned their gazes on Twistey.

The relative newbie's face slowly coloured, reddening to the tips of her ears. "Oh. No. Well… no. No. Um. Weeeeeell…"

---

Because it is traditional, dagnabbit.

(Obviously this fic does absolutely nothing to address the issue. ^_^)

hS

You either drift away, or live long enough to see yourself become famous. ~Albert Einstein Sun Tzu Spock, probably

hS

Construction also has a worker shortage, so you can get hired pretty easily.

Electricians and plumbers get paid really well in first-world countries.

Construction can be pretty decent blue-collar labour if you don't mind the physical labour, and employees are treated better than chain shops do.

You might also want to look into becoming a plumber, electrician, etc, etc once you've got a day job and some money for trade school/an apprenticeship/whatever's the norm. They pay well and there's a lack of people to fill the jobs.

I actually do really like this fic. :-). Like, seriously, it was a lot of fun. The issue I had with the filk was just that the meter seemed to be a bit off. Then again, I would assume that accent may change that, as hS does not have mine.

Sorry for the ambiguity, I continue to be Bad At This Communicating Thing.

Chain retail places don't want to keep anybody around so long that they get promoted into earning benefits or a living wage, heaven forbid, and Wal-Mart has a reputation for not treating its employees very well on balance. I'd say you were well shut of it, but I know how much job-hunting sucks, and I'm sorry. It makes everyone feel like scum.

Try a Starbucks, if you've got one. (They're almost everywhere, but I don't know where you are, so I'unno.) The CEO actually believes in using his power for good, and helping store employees go to school and stuff.

... I was gonna say something in my signature, but it got too long, so: A few years ago, I wanted to work at Teavana, or Adagio Teas, or Argo Tea, because those were cruddy retail jobs I thought I could actually get into. I love tea. But somehow, despite having all the enthusiasm in the world and being an intelligent, educated, fairly personable individual, I couldn't convince any of them to take me. Now, thanks to a rec from a church choir friend, I'm the receptionist at a small acupuncture clinic in one of the nice suburbs. I'm not getting paid a ton, but it's a great place to be, the people are awesome, getting there is easier than getting to the technically-closer pizza place I was at before, and it's opened up other opportunities, too.

(And if I have time, I make tea when I get in, and offer it to the clients. They usually want their own thing, though, rather than whatever I've got in the kettle. Sigh.)

Life isn't fair. This is a good thing. Yeah, it means you have to work hard for the good stuff, but it also means you probably don't deserve the crap that happens to you, and you never know when you might luck into something you never imagined.

~Neshomeh

I think they just fire people at random, from what I've heard.

Thoth smiled softly as he pulled Granz close, hugging him gently as he fitted his head neatly to the other man’s shoulder. “You are amazing,” he whispered into Granz’s skin.

Granz blushed and hugged his lover back. “Thank you, darling,” he murmured. “You’re pretty wonderful yourself, you know.”

Thoth chuckled, a low noise rather unlike his normal laugh. “And you’re better.”

“Lies. You.”

“Nope. You.”

“You.”

“You.”

“It’s you.”

“No, it’s you, pup.”

Granz smiled at the childish argument. “Hey, if I’m a puppy, you’re a chick.”

Thoth all but choked on a laugh at that. Once he recovered, he argued, “That’s just for chickens.”

Granz pressed a kiss to the top of Thoth’s head, smiling a little wider and more than a little more mischievously. “Wanna bet on that, Birdie?”

Thoth nuzzled the shoulder he rested on. “Five bucks says I’m right.”

“I’ll take that. Five says I’m the one who’s right.” The ice-cream-loving Boarder pulled his little bird closer still. “But we can check later.”

The programmer smiled and pulled his head away from Granz’s shoulder to give him a soft kiss. “Yeah. Cuddles now.”

---

Two hours later, Thoth was five bucks poorer and one nickname richer.