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Imagine the anthropomorphic personification of a disinterested sigh. Now give it thick, wavy hair the colour of a dying field mouse and a frankly embarrassing pot belly. You are now in possession of an Scapegrace. Use it wisely, because Lord knows I don't. =]

As for recs, PhobohS and Ixomeh are always good ideas. Also corsets. Corsets work. =]

I have made some minor edits to help clear all that up:

~~

“Thoth, how did you get your name?” Tom asked the question seemingly apropos of nothing.

Thoth sighed, not looking up from his book. His partner’s occasional and seemingly random enquiries resulted in discussions that were either mildly interesting or extremely irritating. Explanations of his personal history, to his mind, tended toward tiresome. “‘Thoth’ was the name I took after my legion’s egress from the Imperium. It was the name of an ancient Terran god of knowledge, although many details regarding this god have been long forgotten. It is an arrogant name, perhaps, but it is better to appear pretentious than to show a lack of confidence. In most cases, at least.”

“You know, I’ve been reading about Thoth of late,” said Tom. “While it may be half-forgotten in your continuum, in World One knowledge of Egyptian mythology is still very much alive. It’s quite fascinating.”

Thoth looked up, at once intensely focused. “Might you provide me with such information?”

“Certainly!” Tom grinned, almost laughing. “Take the book. I’ve just been reading about Thoth’s origins, so that’s where the bookmark is.” He tossed a moderate-sized tome over to the Space Marine.

Thoth caught the book and began to read rapidly.

“Well?”

Thoth nodded. “Fascinating. I appreciate it.”

“You’re not going to—”

“No. The fact that you continue attempting to jab at me is more bothersome than the jabs themselves.”

Tom gave his most winning smile. “Well, I’m glad you enjoy the book at any rate, headchild.”

“Tom…” Thoth sighed. “Cease. It is pointless, and I am reading.”

Tom turned to his monitor. Sooner or later, he’d manage to get a reaction. And although he recognized this might be a bad idea, he found it amusing nonetheless.

If it helps, in his verse, "senior professor" and "old wizard" are occasionally the same person.

What about the pheromones that spehs mahrines give off? Those would help with shipping.

(This is not an actual thing.)

No limits. None. I'd prefer if you're going to ship me if you'd use they/them, because, well, they're my pronouns.

I am tall, with dirty blond hair (No longer green, sadly.) I'm sort-of skinny and below average weight, and have blue eyes. Nothing unusual, honestly.

Thoth or 'Plith or anyone who knows what I look like, if you think this is off feel free to correct me, I am not to good at describing myself.

I am a gangly, almost six foot,(Maybe I am exactly six feet tall? Idk) guy with short "European hair" and have been told I have either a British or Australian accent. I am white, with a "traditionally noble" that is fairly large. I am not very fit, but have some muscle on me. Uhh... I have been told I have "Slenderlimbs" and some others have said I have a hansom face, but I am not sure how accurate these statements are. I have what looks like horizontal scars on my lower back as a result of growing. I have one of those bodies that make it hard to find pants that fit well.
I think that is it, but again, if you know what I look like, feel free to pitch in. Sorry if it wasn't very helpful.

I would love to see what people come up with, just don't ship me with Thoth. Other than that, go for it! I look forwards to seeing what pairings get made!

If you actually care to bother with accurate descriptions in something this silly, have the Bath 2009 Gathering (Among Others) Report. It's a fun read and I haven't changed much. {= )

~Neshomeh

I had a great idea for a way
To update jokes in that soliloquy
In Náriel, a farce (in the Musée,
For Númenórë sank into the sea).
I'd ref'rences that many Agents know,
And might through laughter help them to unwind.
One Gabby/Capper lemon later, though
I found the Bleeprin drove them from my mind!
This is a lesson learned; I need to write
Ideas down while still fresh in my brain.
Or else, if I must bleach my brain, I might
Unable be to bring them up again.
I wish I could recall the gags and see
If they were funny as they seemed to be.

Also a Sindarin must-not-leave-PPC-territory dub of World 1's animated reconstruction of i-Vellas e-Dalechoth*!

Hopefully I'm not creating a mini-Reaper here. According to my sources, "Dalec" should not be affected by the mixed mutation. I created the mini-Reaper Talek last year by neglecting the soft mutation.

* "The Power (lit. 'Might') of the Daleks"

Tall, scrawny, brown hair, lots of tattoos and piercings.

May I also submit (should Nesh opt in) Neshomeh/Thoth in recognition of their first mission together?

Right! Uh... as for limits, please don't ship me with Horvat or Grundleplith. Beyond that, I'm open to anything. Not a TON of suggestions, I'm interested to see what you guys come up with.

As for descriptions, IRL I'm a somewhat overweight guy of average height. I have brown hair of varying degrees of curliness and a consistently high level of messiness. I should probably shave more, because the beginnings of what might someday be a beard are growing. I have brown eyes, and sometimes wear glasses.

As is traditional, feel free to totally ignore this, and give me long flowing blond hair or whatever.

If you want suggestions for completely inaccurate descriptions of me to use, I actually can help you there too! Some people like to depict me as a human with a bird head (as it is supposed to be for the god I named myself as). Some people also like to give me wings. I dunno how that started.

Also, Tomash suggested depicting me as a Space Marine a while back, so that's an option as well. Obviously, since it's the shipfest, you may want to ignore various more inconvenient aspects of this.

Cheers!

Happy March, everyone! This day means a few things to me, but the only one presently relevant (subject to change) is that this marks me being able to make this.

Shipfest Sign-Ups!

For anyone who wasn't here last year, this is the thread where you opt-in for being shipped (and if you do not want to be shipped and are worried about it happening anyways, you'll be happy to know about that) and post your desired ships, the ones that do not include yourself unless you've talked it over with the other member/members of said ship - otherwise, it could be Pretty Creepy(tm) - and definitely any limits you have on being shipped, such as "not with men/women" or "not this particular thing" or "use THESE pronouns". You're also welcome to add suggestions, like saying you get stressed a lot so there's plenty of potential for Hurt/Comfort.
It would also be really, really handy to provide an actual description of yourself.

Cheers, all!

I forgot to post on my actual Boardiversary, February 1st, and only remembered yesterday. But, anyway, I've been here for a year! Which is... just crazy. I still feel like a newbie.

Thanks for doing so much for me, PPC, even though I haven't really done much in return as far as community goes. I've learned quite a few life lessons, made some very dear friends, and this place has helped me through some hard times. I do hope I've matured since my introduction post, though (seriously, it was really embarrassing and I blush just thinking about it).

Also, I'm changing my name to AC. Everyone calls me that on the Discord already, and... well, my original one is pretty dumb and narcissistic.

Ah, this one got me good. I only saw the first Kingsman movie soundless over someone's shoulder on an airplane, so I didn't recognize what was going on at all as this story opened. I was thinking it was an original story, until the disguise change and charge list moment. Looking back, I probably should have picked up on the Sueish traits in the Stormy character, especially some of his descriptions, but again, I didn't know the canon, so I didn't know what was "acceptable." All in all, a very excellent bait-and-switch.

I was also quite amused by the conversation between Cassie and Em while Stormy is breaking down the door. Em just going on and on with her "compliments" obliviously. Hee. And it leads into a nice, sweet ending.

Just want to point out, in this one line:
"'. . . you are charged with bending the Kingsman canon into an n-dimensional pretzel . . .'"
Kingsman should be italicized since it's being used as the title of the universe, rather being used in-universe as the organization.

—doctorlit currently views Kingsman as a silent film, but talkies are overrated, eh?

I don't know God!Thoth's origin either (and don't really feel like looking it up, if it's NSFW), but it's still kind of a cute scene, even if there is an element of pranking on Tom's end of it.

That said, I don't understand why Thoth feels that Tom's newest question is "approaching tiresome" when Tom has literally only asked a one-sentence question at that point. Especially since he ends up getting interested in the conversation a couple of paragraphs later.

Some typos:
"' . . . it is better to appear pretentious then to show a lack of confidence.'"

"'The fact that you continue attempt to jab at me is . . .'"

—doctorlit

Wow, that was an age ago, it was fun! Came back, got a MSc, now back on the job hunt market....

Is it acceptable to decorate the feather with wire, beads and gems?

The spikes go to the minis, they will know what to do with them.