“The only bad writing is unwritten writing. However, there are many bad readers.”
—lolkittyking33
Welcome, fans of the Protectors of the Plot Continuum and supporters of the Canon Protection Initiative! If you've got a story to plug, an opinion to share, or a discussion you want to join in, this is the place!
If you're looking for PPC stories to read, why not start with The Original Series – the missions of the famous assassins Jay and Acacia, the very first stories in PPC history. Once you've finished them, check out the list of Killed Badfic to find a mission you like the look of, or The Complete List of PPC Fiction to look up specific agents or departments.
Before you join the fun, there are some important links you should know about. Being familiar with these will save you a lot of hassle!
This list is also available as a Atom/RSS feed
“The only bad writing is unwritten writing. However, there are many bad readers.”
—lolkittyking33
So... I'm not sure I'm actually going to take part in the Games myself (I'm... not sure I actually ever did aside from commenting!), but I wanted to clarify that, despite the fact I don't really have much in the way of active agents ATM, I still qualify as active so my characters are actually all available! Even those from TWWA.
Sure, Sergio and Nikki retired ages ago. Ami was never an agent. But what kind of self-respecting badfic author cares about continuity? If you want to use them, do your worst. Just stay clear of Kathleen, Faith and Virgilia - those characters are actually Aelit's, not mine.
“Mary Sue” is just a term jealous sexists use to criticize those brave enough to write! I’m sure Ellie Mae is great!
The Sues that the PPC hunts are completely different! They’re just silly monsters.
—lolkittyking33
In the fic they already seemed to be starting to have an arc about what's expected of them (both as a member of a long line of yanderes and of surprise British royalty) vs what they actually want, and I feel like continuing that would be interesting. Their relative lack of emotions could also give some great comedy and I think they'd fit in interestingly if/when I and some of the other discord folk get around to sporking the PAL series proper, what with their relation to the sue and the series. Also I've put her through a bunch of scenarios in the incorrect quotes generator with my other agent ideas and want to have an excuse to draw some of them.
Thankfully no one’s gonna slap badfic quotes on a t-shirt as a way to catch art thieves
Which, now that I’ve said that, gives me a very silly idea for a crackfic
Like omigod Im so happy I can do this again!!!!!1 I have lots of new storys for u guys!!!! I think I like finally got these hackers of my account so I can right in peace witout being bullied. I don’t write Mary Sues!!! Ellie Mae Rosebud is not a Sue so f right off if u think she is!1 I tots like wirting about romance (and like smut teehee) and fantasfical andvengures!!: like teh lord of teh rings!
It plagiarized me! Look! Though I do like what it did with Dafid. ;)
—lol
So does anyone remember me? I was here back when FanficVerse was FanficLand—ah, the good old days! Anyway, I wrote Stangest Love back 2004. I’d like to think I’ve improved since then lol. Here’s my recent Glooming (it’s by a PPC writer!!) fic, the glooming rise of edward. More PPC stuff soon!
Remember, the only bad writing is unwritten writing!!!
—lolkittyking33
((Does not melt in despair
Yay! Badfic games! —Ls))
It vill destroy you all! Mwa hahahahaha!
—ZELL
((I think Anti-hS is more right-wing than I. Go figure.))
If you’re writing, I must read!
Wait, what about a Usual Ten-PPC crossover—
—Ls
iff youv'e been paying atetnion to me yu shuold know taht Ihave been PLAYJERRISED by an AYE-AYE atl east thast what Lililith saed. I tink we need to sohw that strepsirrhine primate native to Madagascar with rodent-like teeth that perpetually grow[3] and a special thin middle finger WHAST' WHAT. Sow it hoe TRUU PPC FANSS WRIGHT.
sO every2 geto ver to fanficVERSE adn wright all teh ORSOME PpC FISC you can TIHNK OF!!1! TAht'll show it!
-JayBird
PZ: RED MY FICSS mu girflend betes them noww.
(Because Linstar would probably have melted in despair if I didn't get this up, and the [checks] playjerrising aye-aye was a good opening.)
Welcome to the PPC Badfic Game! Ripping off the previous intro post because that seems to be a tradition now...
What is this? This is the thread where we let our inner badfic writers have free rein. All PPC stories are technically fanfics of the Original Series - but they're all goodfics. That's clearly unreasonable - most fanfic of anything is terrible. So this is your chance to write the baddest of the badfics. Go nuts!
Who can I write about? Any agents currently in the PPC are open for you to mutilate. There's a Creativity Shield around ffV, so everything here is emphatically uncanon. Try to avoid using abandoned agents whose creators have left, and if someone asks in this thread that their agents not be used, please respect that.
Where do I post? In this thread, please. An increasing number of previous games are on fanficVERSE, but it's not a live site; I'll archive stuff When I Get Round To It (TM).
What name should I post under? You should come up with the badficauthorest name you can, of course! Take a look at some of our previous examples. (Note: there's no need to make a new account, just edit your name when you post.)
What sort of story should I write? A bad one! Obviously. But also one that's fun to read. Try not to overdo it on the illegible typos, and remember that you're trying to be funny, not offensive.
Can I leave reviews? Emphatically yes - that's half the fun of the game! But do remember to leave them in character - and equally, remember that the flames you receive are not real flames. They're a game. Don't get upset.
Do I need a beta? Hahahahahahahaha. Don't be ridiculous. ^-^ What sort of badfic writer has a beta?
Do I need Permission? Again, what sort of badfic writer asks permission? (No. No you don't.)
Why are we doing this? Because it's fun! And traditional!
hS/JayBird/fanficVERSE Admin
((I don't even remember JayBird's last story existing... I'll have to, gulp, read it and see if it should continue.))
The PolitScales site has been down for the past day or so, but luckily I found a backup version here. I raced through the questions as anti-Huinesoron, and then pasted Scape's results across so I could work on them.
FROM: Huinesoronic Ground Command
TO: Kaitlyn Ground Control
Heeeey lovely, hear you're having some Scapegrace issues. What did they do, splash down and then take that mountain overlooking your base. That's rotten, especially now they've deployed those laser drones of theirs.
I've got to admit, I figured the Scapegraces would be more devoted to the Great Regulation, but from the messages we've intercepted it sounds like they're more aligned with the Lilies and Neshomeh. It's just a blessing they're so anarchic, otherwise we'd really be in trouble.
We've got no idea what's going on out east. There seems to be an armed standoff around Yuki's island; we're feeding defensive tech to the Yuki forces to disrupt the Let-It-Bes, but they're hardly an ally. The Bookworms appear to be trying to build an actual settlement - on a radioactive coastline, no less! - and the Linstars are working on something underwater. Given the circumstances of their retreat from the Neshomeh-Winterwood coast, we can only assume it's some crazed mana-powered doomsday device.
I was surprised by the number of scales on which Kaitlyn is more extreme than Scapegrace. Working in a little of the implied story from Linstar and Bookworm's posts here, but basically Huinesoronic Command is focussed on the west right now.
I've been working on interpreting the URL coding for the results, and I've just about got it all pinned down. It's changed quite a lot since 2018, but with a bit of prodding I can once again provide:
The (colour-rotated) American Monarchist flag
(Stickers no longer have a percentage associated, so Monarchy/white is an on/off switch: either you get both of them, or neither, and white will always be the primary colour. I can do a slightly off-white 13 colonies flag though!)
hS
Ben's boss is not a sentient flower. At least... to my knowledge. Okay, I double-checked, they're definitely not. But I could make a joke about it at some point, thanks for that idea!
Thank you for reading and commenting!
That really explains a lot (and was an interesting dive into how sparse was the PPC before the Board and the Wiki)
About the "every department kills Suvians anyways"... I don't actually see it as so weird. Since Suvians are often what causes the problems of the fic in the first place, I've always seen the choice of department to which the badfic is sorted (in theory, of course!) to as more of a "department best suited to fix the damage" than "department speciaized in the kind of threat" anyways.
I think the flow is something like this:
A "run of the mill" Suvian will get sent primarily to the DMS, with Floaters catching the overflow (and then other departments with free hands when inevitably the overflow fills up also the Floaters' capacity) If the Suvian caused also bad things to the geography of a fic, DOGA it is. If the Suvian is some kind of weird, difficult to deal with or uncanonical species, ESAS. If the Suvian is the connecting point of a nonsensical crossover, then Implausible Crossover will get it. And so on.
In fact, pardon me if I use my own works as an example, but the two collaboration missions I did with Firemagic/Karrin Blue are a good example of that, especially the second one. We had a Suvian that pretty much was the nexus of a big crossover with a lot of powerful magic users and a spaceship with a powerful cannon at hand, so for the Flowers selecting a combined team of Implausible Crossovers (for disentangling the canons) and SpecOps (for damage control) was a no brainer.
In fact, this might be a great help for me, as some of my Ideas involve writing a mission, but I am not into sporking actual badfics anymore. This generator is an excellent way to give myself an outline (and possibly quotable excepts) while not making up the entirety of the fake badfic's plot by myself - and thus keeping the "how I can use this cleverly" challenge.
I’m sure Lily’s description is much more accurate than mine.
The government decides what industries get more funding and what regulations the industries abide by. It’s just got some capitalist elements because individuals can make their own companies under those blanket regulations, and they can get funding for it from the state.
To be more accurate, China is one party authoritarian socialism trying to do capitalist cosplay because the last time it implemented full state control of everything it lacked the infrastructure needed to support everyone, and lots of people died/starved.
~Lily, who is Not Mad and doesn’t want to start another reply chain, but is Chinese and has been back to China in… oh, January 2020.