Subject: Finch stopped in his tracks.
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Posted on: 2016-04-24 03:04:00 UTC

He froze.

Electrons diverted. Fans spun. Numbers tumbled clumsily through his brainchip, resulting in a series of numbers of symbols.
His ocular gazed off into the distance as he observed the statistics.

Sarcasm: 23.4%
Sincerity: 73.65%
Verisimilitude: 33.241%
Sixty-six: 66%
Chanceofbakesale: 2.05%
Chance
of_fatality: 88394%

Bingle ignored Finch’s antisocial behaviour (he kept telling him that calculating in the middle of a conversation was rude, but the fellow just didn’t know where to stop,) and grinned at the group.
Their costumes, he thought, were also quite good, though he couldn’t quite shake the odd sense of weird racist undertones coming from them.
Surely putting the young woman with wings in a bird costume was just strengthening stereotypes? Implying that winged people ought to stay as winged people?
Bingle was certain that he was just imagining it, however.

‘You should have seen his last costume. He went as a refrigerator.’

Finch awoke from his coma, blinking.
A freezer, actually.

‘Welcome back, Finch.’

Finch stared directly at the eyes of the girl, briefly wondering if mind-control was possible through an artificial eye on an artificial brain.

At the very least, he had decided that she wasn’t insulting him, trying to kill him, trying to sell him, trying hack him, trying to mind-control him, or trying to sell disgustingly cheap baked goods to him.

Cheers. I really just stole a vending machine when no-one was looking, and stretched it out a bit,’ Finch admitted, glancing left to right.

‘Finch, you told me very specifically that you didn’t steal that.’

I didn-t tell you anything.

‘That was the very first thing you said when you entered the centre wearing that,’ Bingle said, folding his arms. ‘I recall it perfectly: “Hey, Bingle. It looks like I stole this, but I didn-t, I swear.”’

Nice voice job.

‘Thank you,’ Bingle said, turning his nose up.

Finch turned his attention back to the group he was embarrassing himself in front of.
What-re you all dressed as, anyway?
Finch had his suspicions, but he felt that ‘samurai-veterinarian and patients’ was a tad too specific and anachronistic for a group theme.

‘I know this,’ Bingle said, prepared to gain his reputation back. ‘They are all wearing costumes inspired by the French myth-‘

They-re not, Bingle.

Bingle turned his nose back up.

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